024 – Importance of Eye Contact - a podcast by Alf Herigstad

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Look them in the eye!Today I am going to talk about something that will pave the way for some future topics; Its really important that you start thinking about this first.  I’m talking about making eye contact.

You might be wondering what making eye contact has to do with Being A Better Man…I’m going to tell you. If you lived on a deserted island it wouldn’t be a big deal, you could be a better man every day and never worry about making eye contact…but the fact is, we live on a planet with 7 billion other people.  Eye contact is a huge deal wether you are talking to a girl, hanging out with your friends or going to a job interview.

Eye contact is one of those primal, subconscious things that we react to from deep in our brain stem.  It is a non-verbal form of communication that instills an immediate connection.Too much eye contact can be bad…too little can also be bad.  Too much eye contact can make another person feel like you are trying to dominate them, it can be threatening, rude and aggressive.

Too little, or no eye contact makes people not trust you, you appear shifty, uninterested, or simply lacking any self esteem.The right amount of eye contact conveys confidence, trustworthiness, mutual connection and likability.  So one reason this is part of the Being A Better Man equation is because we have a responsibility as men to make the people we come into contact with feel at ease.  Studies show that the perfect amount of eye contact is between 30 and 60 percent, depending on the situation. 

Aside from our responsibility to other people, there are great benefits to us as well.  Say you are going in to interview for a job.  When you meet your prospective employer you look him in the eye as you shake hands, during the interview you make eye contact with him whenever he is talking, and most of the time when you are talking.  You will appear interested, sincere, honest and evenmore intelligent.  Your chances of getting that job just increased by doing this one little thing.

The importance of making eye contact cannot be over-rated guys.  I have noticed, especially with younger guys that eye contact has become like a lost art…sometimes it is non-existant.
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