103 – A Female Perspective Of Manhood - a podcast by Alf Herigstad

from 2016-09-19T08:14:13

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A FEMALE PERSPECTIVE OF MANHOOD…
I’m going to get right in to today’s topic, this idea came to me from a listener, a young woman in Colorado.  Yes…women listen to Being A Better Man too.I’m really glad she sent me this idea, because it’s important to consider the female perspective.  Women comprise about half of the world population and their input and contribution is vital to the continuation of our species and our civilization.
Also…women provide us with a very important, very real perspective of manhood.  A perspective that we would probably never realize on our own because…we are men.  Our experience in the world is very different. This listener shared a perspective with me that I probably would not have come up with on my own, but after reading it, I could see the truth in it and I think it needs to be addressed.
This listener is a professional woman in her 20’s, a college graduate, and she contends that most women see two primary ways in which men try to assert their masculinity in the world.As I go over this try not to get activated…don’t try to judge the truth or accuracy of her position as it applies to you.  The thing is…its valid, because this is her perception, and if she see’s it this way then it’s likely a lot of other women do as well.  So lets learn what we can from this.
So here is what she said;  Type A is the smooth operator, the ladies man, the guy with “game”, sexual prowess, the guy that is all about hooking up and putting notches on his bedpost.  If this type A guy isn’t especially good looking, then he probably has a lot of money, and he uses it to entice women and effectively purchase his masculinity.Type B comes from a place of aggression rather than sex.  In her words;  he “spends endless hours doing upper-body workouts at the gym and getting into bar fights to show the other guys how “alpha” he is.”  We all know guys like this, they can be loud and over-bearing in social settings. 
She went on to say that aside from type A and B, there is also type C.  She said type C guys are the worst from her point of view.  She said, and I quote:  “this is the most terrifying and annoying group from a women’s perspective because these men act as though your refusing to go on a date, dance with them, or accept a drink is directly denying them of their natural “right” to manhood. When this feeling occurs, these guys will move on from the “sex” method of obtaining “manhood” to the next method, which is to become verbally, and sometimes physically or sexually violent.”I have heard of this before, though I can’t say I have personally witnessed it…good thing too because the guy would probably wind up in the hospital.  But I have heard of young women complaining that when they refuse the advances of a guy he immediately becomes abusive, calling her names or whatever.  As though there is a culture of men of a certain age who seem to think they are entitled to whatever woman they desire…as though simply the act of breathing should be enough to win a woman affections. 
I don’t know when or how this culture started happening, or what age of men practice this the most…but I do know it’s a horrible thing.  Behavior like this is the complete opposite of what it means to be a man in my opinion.  They are behaving more like animals.This listener then went on to describe yet another class of men…Type D.  These are the guys who don’t fall onto any of the other categories. They aren’t really good with women, or it’s not a priority… they aren’t physically intimidating or good at sports, they don’t make a lot of money, etc.
These type D guys are often called nerds, geeks, or losers, and regarded as“un-manly” by types A,B, and C.  I personally feel bad for these guys, I know the type, they feel invisible in the world, they have no confidence in social situations and I think many of them don’t even...

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