230 – When It’s Hard Being A Father - a podcast by Alf Herigstad

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When It’s Hard Being A Father…Be A better Man!
Hello Men!As I predicted a few weeks ago the summer schedule has been a little tough.  I have not been doing three episodes a week like many of you are used to.  There was no Monday or Wednesday episode this week.  Summers are always busy up here in the Pacific Northwest but this summer has been particularly so.  What I can guarantee is that you will be able to count on the Friday episodes every week.  As the weather changes heading into September I suspect things will return to normal though.
Because this is a Friday episode I am honor bound to tell you about the sponsor of this show, a company called Stump Town Kilts.  When a lot of people think of kilts they imagine plaid garments worn by men toting bagpipes and marching in a funeral or something.  While those are definitely traditional Tartan kilts…that is not what I’m talking about.  Stump Town Kilts makes modern kilts for the contemporary man and woman.  They are garments of comfort, designed with style and function in mind and suitable for everyday use.  I own three of these kilts and I have done literally everything wearing them from the dirty jobs to the fancy events.  They are durable and comfortable in the dirt, and they look fantastic when you are wanting to get noticed at a social event.  These kilts have several innovative features that their competitors do not possess like the adjustable sizes and snap on accessories for example.  They come in a variety of colors and even the rivets have options; you can get brass, gun metal, or chrome rivets. If you have ever thought of owning a kilt, or if you have an old dusty kilt you never wear because it doesn’t fit quite right anymore or it’s too much trouble making it hang right.  Then a kilt from Stump Town is the only kilt you should consider.  Listeners of this program can get a substantial discount simply by going to http://stumptownkilts.com (stumptownkilts.com) and entering the code:  betterman, at checkout.  all lower case, all one word.  Do that and you will receive your special discount.  Do yourself a favor and check out http://stumptownkilts.com (stumptownkilts.com) today._________________________________________

Ok guys today I want to talk about an aspect of fatherhood.  A lot of the things we talk about here can apply equally to anyone.  Many of the topics we deal with have to do with human character and people who are not a man can get something out of it as well, that’s why we have so many non-man listeners and I welcome them.  However, there are some things that are specific to being a man, and fatherhood is one of them.Within the realm of fatherhood there is an aspect of it, a phenomenon that is relatively new in human life and specific to the modern times we are living in.  What I’m talking about is when men are involuntarily separated from their children, as a direct result of relationship failure with the mother.
This can be a touchy, emotionally charged topic, but it’s also a fact of modern life and I feel like I need to talk about it a little bit.  This is something I have dealt with personally in my life.  Many, many men I know have also dealt with it.  My own son is still dealing with it right now and I just got a letter from a long time listener named Tom where he told me about the struggles he is going through regarding access to his children.  It’s a real thing, a heart wrenching thing, and as men we really need to think about from every angle.In my opinion, the highest calling any man has in life, the most profound, prestigious, important position he will ever hold is that of a father.  Becoming a father is a mans best opportunity to influence the future, to leave a legacy, to alter humanity in some way by passing on what he has become and lessons he has learned to the next generation. 
Sadly, there are many men who do not give fatherhood the

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