COMA radio : M - a podcast by fiv france

Tribute Playlist:

Moby - "Hotel Intro"
Moby - "God Moving Over The Face Of The Waters"
Philip Glass - "Koyaanisqatsi"
Moby - "Down Slow"
Tori Amos - "Toast"
Moby - "My Weakness"

Tori Amos "Toast" Lyrics:

I thought it was Easter time
The way the light rose
Rose that morning
Lately you've been on my mind
You showed me the rope
Ropes to climb
Over mountains
And to pull myself
Out of a landslide
Of a landslide

I thought it was harvest time
You always loved the smell of the wood burning
She with her honey hair
Dalhousie Castle
She would meet you there
In the winter
Butter yellow
The flames you stirred
Yes, you could stir

I raise a glass
Make a toast
A toast in your honor
I hear you laugh
And beg me not to dance
On your right standing by
Is Mr. Bojangles
With a toast he's telling me it's time
To raise a glass
Make a toast
A toast in your honor
I hear you laugh and beg me not to dance
On your right standing is
Mr. Bojangles
With a toast he's telling me it's time
To let you go
Let you go

I thought I'd see you again
You said you might do
Maybe in a carving
In a cathedral
Somewhere in Barcelona

4.9.07 : sad

Avoid it when it's most painful. I think it's what I do best. But just exactly how do you repress a year's worth of grief. How do you remember and honor a friend that's been nothing more than a memory. So much more than a memory. Nothing real to touch. It's the memory of the touch. No skin of the hand that pulled you in for those comfort-laced hugs. No sounds of the one-and-only laughter. I can hear that laugh. Her laugh. But it's been nothing more than strips of tape pulled from the recorder that's housed in my head. I'm selfish. I want more than memories and a chest full of love.

4.9.07 : silent

I know that you know. Why I'm having such a hard time saying anything to you. I feel like my voice is broken. So all I can do is write my message on a piece of paper. And set it on the corner of my desk and wait for you to come by and read it.

4.10.07 : stunned

And I don't know what the hell just happened during this 3:00a. But a woman, from I don't even know where, hit me with the hardest words that I could have ever received today. Today is M's day. A day of remembrance and recognition. All mixed with hours upon hours of a humbled heavy heart-washing. And yet. That's exactly who this woman came to my inbox speaking of. An inbox that's barely been tampered with 2-3 times. A complete stranger that has been infiltrated with the inspiration of my great friend Michelle. A stranger that had been brought to tears. Reading those received words on a day like today. Pulled the tears from me as well. Luring the full bulk of tears that I've been trying so damn hard to hold intact. To keep tightly looped within my heavy heart. Feeling like I've been stunned into a speechless sentimental here. I'm all over the place here. And I don't know how to control it. How do you keep your composure when a stranger knocked your lungs clear out into an unnanounced time-out. I am so overwhelmed. All I can say is thank you.

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