Podcasts by ESL RPG

LMoP 15 - Combing the Countryside from 2021-07-15T12:35:33

Well, not really. Although there is a comb involved. Oh, and wolves! Gonna fight us some wolves. While half the group is asleep.

Oh well.

Also, we have a Patreon here:

<...

LMoP 14 - Walking Around Town, Getting Paid, And Things Set In Stone from 2021-05-28T06:56:50

On this episode, our characters go around after the events of last game's... interesting end, and try to collect money for jobs they were asked to do. Some successfully, some less successfully, ...

Patreon Preview: DA 2 - Unhelpful Attorneys, and Pubescent Demons from 2021-05-21T09:24:16

What happens when an attorney gets confused by the appearance of a lizard? How helpful is an incubus too young to seduce? What were the charges?

Well, you don't get ALL that information...

Patreon Preview: Devil's Advocate 1 - Welcome to Hell from 2021-05-12T08:09:47

Spoilers of the good kind! This episode is a preview of a One-Shot we are writing and playtesting that you may play soon-ish!
Join our group, as they play lawyers in the Waterdeep law offic...

3-21-2020 Bloopisode! from 2021-04-29T19:00

Welcome to Bloopers, where all our naughty words, questionable things, and stuff we sing goes. Possibly not safe for work, potentially not safe for people who hate rules lawyers.

Also, ...

TTC 40 - Golem Feels and Old Man Squeels from 2021-04-21T09:07:22

Our heroes finish the fight with some conversation, talking to a goblin shaman and a golem (that can't actually talk, and is fine with just going off to do their own thing.) Then... Ok, they got...

TTC 39 - Fire Away Until It Works from 2021-04-15T10:19:47

It has been a long time! Our heroes explore the cave looking for a dragon, find some definitely not-dragon things, and fight!

Also, we have a Patreon here:

Listen

NSFW? Bloopers, LMoP, 3-1-2020 from 2021-03-19T09:34:07

What it says in the title! Do not listen around small children or bosses. Now come here how bad my Spanish really is!

Also, we have a Patreon here:

Listen

LMoP 13 - A Glass Staff, Explosions, and Johnny Got His... Horrible End. from 2021-03-17T11:14:52

Our heroes clear out the rest of the Redbrand hideout, and take what they can from the area before interrogating those left alive. Those left alive include a crippled wizard, a Goblin named Droo...

LMoP 12 - A Prisoner with Real Gump-Reference Battle Damage! from 2021-03-11T11:30:18

So a lot of things happen here. Our players try very hard to violently remove manacles without accidentally removing hands. A boss fight is anticlimactic. Non-lethal divine amputation.

...

LMoP 11 - Pits, Bones, Heads, and A Different Kind Of Totally Not Slave from 2021-03-06T09:19:09

Warning, for non-Spanish speakers, do not repeat anything Barfy says. For Spanish speakers... maybe use headphones? And prepare for some bad language.

This episode, traps are the pits, ...

LMoP 10 - DMPCs, Crazy Stuff, and Getting In The Cellar from 2021-02-25T08:46:55

Our players find their rogue too hungover to join, one of their goblin prisoners secretly hiding sneaky tools, and themselves going under a mansion to find someone with a stick of silicates.
...

Jeff's Door 2-15-2020 Bloopers from 2021-02-04T15:00

What it says in the title!
May feature cursing, swearing, innuendo, etc.

JD 34 - On Eight-Legged Missionaries from 2021-02-02T08:39:21

Our heroes fight for their lives, and survive by the skin of their teeth. They then interrogate a... spider. Then, Master Theologian Arry has to explain why it is not a good idea to send giant s...

JD 33 - Spider Fight, Spider Fight from 2020-11-25T04:11:10

In a place as dark as night.
Fighting what? Giant bugs.
With poison fangs and stabby legs.

Ok, in all seriousness, they sneak, then charge, then fight, then something very unexpe...

Bloopisode of Feb 1st game (2020) from 2020-11-18T07:46:37

Yeah, so when our professionalism slipped, or we got far off topic, or needed things clarified, or cursed, or let loose the hounds of sexual innuendo more than usual.... all that go here.

LMoP 9 - Clerics Lead The Way from 2020-11-13T09:20:55

In this episode, the healers charge! And soon discover one of Merphie's Multiple Mandates.

No, seriously, it gets crazy. Like, really crazy. Everyone has fun with it, but thinks maybe ...

LMoP 8 - A Coy Koi and Voices from 2020-11-11T05:34:58

Our players first get a history lesson on Phandelver, then find some other information by asking around.

They meet a boy named Carp who doesn't drink. Then they meet a voice that asks f...

LMoP 7 - Minor Torture And Other Things from 2020-11-06T04:05:52

This time, our players decide information is best, so they... persuade information out of their captured Redbrand. With blood.
They also encounter the town Mayor, Quimbey Kennedy (Yes, reall...

LMoP 6 - Exchanging Barbs of Various Kinds from 2020-10-14T13:52:09

In this episode, our character are introduced to a shady individual with some money for buying things they have, a job for them to do, and some interesting, insinuative, and possibly insulting t...

LMoP 5 - Shopping On the Urchin Tour from 2020-10-08T09:20:19

This time, our heroes arrive in Phandalin. They immediately choose to get a street urchin guided tour of town to go around selling off their loot, completing their quests, and buying new weapons...

Bloopers, 1-25-20 NSFW from 2020-09-28T15:00

Look! It's Bloopers! Where we say all the bad stuff we can't include in the normal podcast!

Or the philosophical discussions.

Or the rules lawyering.

Or... other stuff...

TTC 38 - Goliath-Backpacks and Attacking-Raptor-Packs from 2020-09-25T09:04:28

So those things that should not be? Dinosaurs. They were dinosaurs. One gets mocked to death.

Later, an interesting encounter with some people with a very stony demeanor.

Also,...

TTC 37 - An Odd Couple, and Another Bob from 2020-09-17T10:16:02

Our heroes make it to the base of Copper Mountain, learn why it is called Copper Mountain, meet some nice people named Widow and Bachelor, who tell them about a dragon named Bob.

They a...

NSFW, 1-11-2020 Bloopers! from 2020-09-15T15:00

Here are all the bloopers from the latest Jeff's Door game! And some of it is just rules lawyering and philosophy!

Yes, that is the reason it is so long. Lots of lawyering and philosoph...

JD 32 - Spider On Spider Violence from 2020-09-12T15:00

Our party somehow finish the fight between the hunters and the dryad! Apparently, Arry has the best words? Anyway, they also venture deeper into the woods, and hear the tale of a man who lost a ...

JD 31 - We Would Really Like People Not Dying from 2020-09-09T09:43:24

In this episode, negotiations between the hunters, the dryad, and the group break down to fighting. It goes... long and badly... with a lot of down and up and down and up.

And it doesn'...

JD 30 - No Fish Pancakes from 2020-09-03T11:05:24

In this episode, we continue the adventures of Meg Ryan, in which Meg has a possibly prophetic dream, Arry makes pancakes, everyone makes progress on the road, they make lunch in a town that vag...

Bloopisode, 11-30-2019 from 2020-08-21T12:01:24

Bloopers, distractions, rules-lawyering, and explaining the orgy. This part is actually pretty safe for work, the rest less so.

JD 29 - Of Chunks and Organizations from 2020-08-19T10:13:25

In this episode, combat fails to end quickly, in no small part because of quickly-moving shoes, and conversations get confused.

Also, we have a Patreon here:

Listen

JD 28 - Gnomes, Crests, Bandits, Rats from 2020-08-12T20:00

Our heroes leave on their quest to take some bandit scalps, and meet an interesting little man along the way.

Along the way, they scramble to blend in and be accepted by the bandits. Listen

JD 27 - Bears Are Light? from 2020-08-07T12:36:42

We return to Jeff's Door, this game introducing a new Player!

Scott joins us playing as Sturm, a bear-loving barbarian!

Join us next time for our other new player, Oleg!
Listen

LMoP Bloopers, 11-16-2019 from 2020-08-01T09:11:06

There's a few things Not Safe For Work here. You know the drill.

LMoP 4, The Charge of The Light Halfling from 2020-07-31T12:18

In this episode, more combat happens, more rolls are fumbled, more creative ways to use spellcasters are found, Elton Beerbottle imitates Elton John, some old people are found, "totally-not-slav...

LMoP 3, Magical Bouncing Tank Medics from 2020-07-24T08:03:47

In this episode, medics tank, choking fails, a shirt is holey, a puppy is bad, and... ok, that is totally not a lion riding a seal. I promise.

Also, we have a Patreon here:

Listen

LMoP 2, Questions, Rest, Anticlimax, and Creative Repurposing from 2020-07-22T09:54:26

In this episode, our heroes continue after a rest to heal up. They get to the cave where their friends were taken to, and try to sneak in. Sometimes it works. Sometimes... Well, just listen.
...

The Lost Mines of Phandelver 1 - Long and Short Introductions! from 2020-07-15T11:55:08

In this episode, we start a new adventure, following the Lost Mines of Phandelver module from the Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition Starter Set!

Our recording quality at the start is.....

CVQTS, Canning Amphibious Hybrids Bloopers from 2020-06-12T15:00

Not Safe for Work, but who needed telling?

Also, we have a Patreon here:

Listen

CVQTS CAH 3, Humanity for None, Victory for One from 2020-06-10T15:00

In this episode, we declare a winner, after many horrible combinations.

Also, we have a Patreon here:

Listen

CVQTS CAH 2, Oh God, there's more? from 2020-05-21T12:29:48

We keep playing Cards Against Humanity!

Also, we have a Patreon here:

Listen

CVQTS. Cards Against Humanity 1, The game begins! from 2020-05-09T11:22:27

WARNING!!! Not safe for work. Anyway, I have said enough, please enjoy!

Made using:
playingcards.io

Compani...

CVQTS 2 - Playing face-to-face games over the internet! from 2020-04-27T13:14:23

Here we cover what games you can play through the internet, and what programs to use to do that.
This is a general overview. We will be doing other videos for detailed guides of how to use t...

Coronavirus Quarantine Special 1 - Tools for Connecting from 2020-04-10T15:00

In this episode, we cover a lot of the tools you need to play tabletop games online. We will cover your low-tech, hardware, and software tools you need to find your students/teachers/family/frie...

TTC 36 - Un Voyage au Champignons from 2020-04-03T10:57:48

Our characters continue their trip with some mushroom soup.

Things get normal for our players, which is not normal for our characters.

Heads up, next will be a bit of a jump in...

TTC 35 - A Fight for Reasons Forgotten from 2020-03-31T15:00

Here is our first episode on the new recording software!

Our heroes return going right into a fight. They fight the hobgoblin, and our players quickly forget why they were fighting.
...

NSFW! Honey Heist Bloopers from 2020-03-29T15:00

You've been warned, now enjoy!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.patreon.com/eslrpg

Bearly There, Honey Heist Analysis from 2020-03-26T15:00

Our players talk about what they like and don't like with this game!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.patreon.com/eslrpg

One Shots 16 - HH 3, Heist 2, Other Bears! from 2020-03-24T15:00

Our bears go on another heist, meet some competition, and BAMBOO!!!! FINALLY!!!!!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.patre...

One Shots 15 - HH, Heist 1, CB Karaoke from 2020-03-20T06:40:13

Sorry for the late upload, let's jump right in.

Our group of (mostly) bears goes to hit a truck convoy, meets up with a character who will return again, and find the honey.

Aft...

One Shots 14 - Honey Heist, "No, Take the Honey Out of the Internet!" from 2020-03-17T15:00

This time we try a new game, Honey Heist, by Grant Howitt. In this episode, we introduce the rules, create characters, and plan the first heist.

And yes, someone really says that.
<...

NSFW HNC - 9-21-2019 Bloopers from 2020-03-15T15:00

Bloopers again! Not for children or work!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.patreon.com/eslrpg

Origins of Buffrat, or Why You Should Be Careful With Random NPCs You Create from 2020-03-14T15:00

As the title says. We actually spent a lot of time playing with Buffrat. A lot. Like a lot a lot. Like we decided to bring him back in other future games, a lot.

This is how popular NPC...

DM Chat with Players! 9-21-2019 from 2020-03-13T15:00

Here we discuss how to deal with players leaving the game, what to do if you don't enjoy the game, things to do to make the game better, not-exactly-homework-but-things-you-do-not-while-playing,...

HNC 12 - Never Waste Meat from 2020-03-12T15:00

Here our heroes try to save the day, do some accidental cooking, and a certain god makes a return.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://ww...

HNC 11 - Smart Old Women are Smart from 2020-03-10T15:00

In this episode, our heroes encounter a lot of craziness, Charon questions her sanity, and a smart old woman is smart.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

HNC 10 - A Muscular Rodent Approaches! from 2020-03-06T15:00

In this episode, we return to the Heroes of New Cydonia campaign! Our heroes left off having firebombed an orphanage by not listening to directions, and start off by un-firebombing said orphanag...

NSFW. TTC 8-31-2019 Bloopers! from 2020-03-05T15:00

Same rules as always, some bad words, so be careful where you listen!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.patreon.com/eslrpg

TTC 34 - Would You Mind Terribly If We Eat You? from 2020-03-03T15:00

In this episode, our players go off to Copper Mountain, Magical Fed Ex, a magic tattoo, they get hired, demonstrate politeness with dead horses, get in a big fight, and fail horribly at sneaking...

TTC 33 - No Paladins Here from 2020-02-26T15:00

In this episode, an ill-advised fight goes forward, Bob joins in, a book gets wet, then dry again, popcorn is eaten, things are shared out, and a direction is set for where our heroes go. <...

TTC 32 - Never Trust an Ex-Gnome from 2020-02-23T15:00

Alright. Some introductions.  Nobody, Somebody, Father Jack, Kit, and Kyoko are gods, and characters from a previous campaign set more than 500 years before. Kit is a druid dragon puppy god...

NSFW!!! Bloopisode, 9-7 from 2020-02-21T15:00

Bloopers again, don't listen at work or with kids!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www....

JD 26 - Scaredy Skellies from 2020-02-19T15:00

In this episode, Turn Undead is used correctly, we fight what's left, and people fail at hitting things a lot. Again.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

Announcement: We are now on Patreon! from 2020-02-14T07:00

Currently, our content is listed on Patreon as Adult Content, making it unsearchable. This can't be helped, as one of our Patron Rewards is unedited episodes we have recorded. But, you can follo...

JD 25 - Is It A Cute Puppy? from 2020-02-13T15:00

In this episode, our group goes to a bar. There, they find a bard with an offer, and Arry drinks, because he needs a drink. Then, everyone goes to explore a canyon. There, they find a boy and he...

JD 24 - Maybe Man Help from 2020-02-10T15:00

Our players talk with a woman about medicine for making a kobold better, wrap up lizards like babies, ask too many questions about houses under water, probably cheat at riddles, learn about bad ...

JD 23 - Discussing Terms of Release from 2020-02-06T15:00

We return to Jeff's Door! Our players try to negotiate what to do with the three people in the backpack. Including the dead one.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

NSFW? Lords of Waterdeep Bloopers! from 2020-02-03T15:00

As always, there are a lot of things you don't want to play around kids or at work. But also, there may be a lot of boring rule stuff.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

Roleplay Conversations with a Board Game: Lords of Waterdeep Analysis from 2020-01-30T15:00

Here we learn that, among other things, the roleplaying part of this board game was made by Juan, and not a part of the game. We also discuss other ways to adapt it to the classroom.

Also...

One Shots 13 - LoWD, Not the Toy Story I Remember from 2020-01-28T15:00

In this episode, we enter the final months of Germanium and Spring. Our players finish many quests, mention many more innuendoes, and we enter into a dance-off with some danger, and a very horri...

One Shots 12 - LoWD, Killers, Turtles, Dudes, and Bros from 2020-01-23T15:00

In this episode, we enter the months of Quadranary and Hogust. Our dudes act like righteous dudes, and some uncool dudes. And the unlikeliest of people save the day. Also, more dirty jokes and i...

One Shots 11 - LoWD, Teaching a Fool How to Love from 2020-01-16T15:00

In this episode, Stick learns why Cal-Cass and Piergeron like clerics so much.
Yes, that seriously happens, and yes, the months so far really are Unnamed, Binary, Tertiary, and June. To be f...

One Shots 10 - LoWD, Dudes and Dragons from 2020-01-13T15:00

On this episode, our players start the game and quickly learn the rules. Also, some rules get troubleshooting.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

...

One Shots 9 - Lords of Waterdeep, Board Game + Role Play from 2020-01-09T15:00

In this episode, we start something different. We take a regular board game set in the Dungeons and Dragons universe, and we add role play to it. This board game can honestly be played like Mono...

NSFW Bloopers With Wizards! from 2020-01-07T15:00

Here are the bloopers for our Harry Potter Homebrew!

As always, don't listen around children or at work, because adult language will be put here. On purpose. Because of course it would ...

Harry Potter Homebrew Analysis from 2020-01-02T15:00

Our players take the time to review this playthrough with the game. Suggestions are made for how to maybe improve on it.

We do plan on in the future releasing this one-page one-shot so ...

One Shots 8 - HPHB Counting Blood Drops from 2019-12-31T15:00

In this episode, our players decide that more detectives are the best way to go. Unfortunately, it doesn't work exactly like they expect.

Also, self-driving cars, and tracking down the ...

One Shots 7, HPHB - Bookstore Owners Know A Lot About Murders from 2019-12-26T15:00

Our heroes start investigating the murder, and the crazy rolls come fast. Also, they decide they need to involve a lot of magical research and magical detectives.
Here are some choice quotes...

One Shots 6, HPHB - Hiding Queens and Girly Screams from 2019-12-19T15:00

Our heroes start an adventure in Los Angeles!

Our heroes get some fish, see some magic, try to Find the Lady, see a murder, and go a little crazy.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

One Shots 5 - Harry Potter Homebrew, Characters and Rules from 2019-12-12T15:00

We are back to trying new games. This time, a very new game, one we are working on ourselves! The idea is, what if Call of Cthulhu met Harry Potter? What if Muggles and Wizards were each other's...

NSFW? 7-15 Bloopisode! from 2019-12-11T15:00

There's the bloopers, and here is the general warning! Don't listen at work or around children.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.pat...

JD 22 - Living in a Backpack from 2019-12-09T15:00

Another fight! It seems like these happen a lot. There is much discussion over what to do with people, how many people can fit inside the backpack of a creature that can carry small cars, when s...

JD 21 - Ghastly Daggers from 2019-12-05T14:36:24

This time, our heroes find a valley of tombs, an anxious young man, a pointy object, and graves not worth robbing.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

JD 20 - The Melee of the Misses from 2019-11-27T15:00

The group goes down the last passageway, and find something interesting in a large chamber. They also find yet another fight, but this one doesn't go nearly as quickly or smoothly as before.
...

JD 19 - Arry Carries from 2019-11-23T15:00

This episode, our players search all but one of the rooms. Along the way, they find gold, spider guts, bottles of unknown stuff, and some kobolds.

Which of course means they f...

JD 18 - A Room With a Ghoul from 2019-11-21T15:00

In this episode, Meg Ryan's group goes down into the depths of the mine. They find a bridge. They cross a bridge. They find many rooms. And as they enter one... they are attacked!

Also, w...

NSFW 6-22-2019 Bloopers! from 2019-11-16T15:00

Here you will find all the jokes, references, curses, and other things we had to cut.

Do NOT listen to this at work or around kids!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

TTC 31 - Hobo Bob from 2019-11-16T03:00

As the fight finishes up, the players loot, and do... other stuff. Because Bob needs information, Shagrat needs to relax, and bodies need to... disappear...

WARNING! This recording feat...

TTC 30 - The Other 300 from 2019-11-11T15:00

This episode is a very long combat, because it is the Frog-Licking Paladins plus The Four. Who are really 5 people. And our group are not paladins, and don't lick frogs. Oh, don't lick frogs, ki...

NSFW? Bloopisode 5-25 from 2019-11-07T15:00

Here are all your bloopers for listening to at home! Seriously! Not at work, people!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.patreon.com/es...

5-25 After Game DM Chat from 2019-11-06T15:00

We were tired, we had no plan, we had no script, and we didn't actually start recording until after we had started talking, so you get to hear how rambling we become, jumping from topic to topic...

JD 17 - Kobold Speedrun from 2019-11-05T15:00

Our heroes set a new personal record for a round of combat. And then go looking for a young man who wants his knife.

Oh, and player conversations get derailed by how difficult dragons r...

JD 16 - Prism and the Wolf from 2019-10-31T15:00

Our heroes fight the bounty hunter, and experience a wide variety of luck!

Although, it all gets rather Shakespearean.

And everyone goes to the mine!

Also, we have a Pat...

JD 15 - Tying Someone Up from 2019-10-26T15:00

In this episode, people talk with the mayor, taverns are visited, directions are taken literally, and the party sees a giant head on the way to Nashkel Mines.

And they just can't make f...

JD 14 - Be My Demonic Pilot from 2019-10-24T15:00

We are back with the adventures of Meg Ryan! Our players set Sabazios to an autopilot controlled by the elder gods. Then, they visit a temple, find more quests, find a helmet and potions, and tr...

NSFW!!! Bloopisode 5-11-2019 from 2019-10-22T15:00

Here are the bloopers, don't listen at work, or near kids, or... eh, I think you know how it works now.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https:/...

TTC 29 - Company Trip from 2019-10-21T15:00

The Frog-Licking Paladins make trees bend, use the not at all cliched technique of pretending to be prisoners, give some people some coffee, and walk through water.  Well, not all of them.<...

TTC 28 - Old Wagons and New Ball Presents from 2019-10-19T15:00

Our heroes are finally ready to go. They head to Muskegon, a port town a long way away. But when they get there, they face a city occupied by enemies! How will they deliver this package to the b...

TTC 27 - The Incredible Journey... Preparation from 2019-10-17T15:00

Welcome back to the adventures of the Frog-Licking Paladins!

After collecting the materials for the secret box to hide the magical energy coming from the evil magic book, and freeing th...

NSFW!! One Shots Call of Cthlulhu Bloopers! from 2019-10-16T03:15:07

Exactly what it says in the title. Don't listen at work or around kids, etc.

Also, expect some small delays due to a long typhoon weekend and university starting up again messing with t...

One Shots 4 - CoC, Does Fire Kill Djinn? from 2019-10-10T15:00

WARNING! Spoilers for the Call of Cthulhu Demo Scenario, "What's In the Cellar?"!!!

Here, the Djinn attacks, people fight and frantically look for a way out. Will they escape? Will they...

One Shots 3 - CoC, Down into the Dark from 2019-10-03T15:00

SPOILERS!!! Some Spoilers for the Call of Cthlulhu Demo Scenario, "What's in the Cellar?"!

As our players go underground, the mystery deepens. They see some things that are there that s...

One-Shots 2 - CoC, Murders and Moths from 2019-10-02T15:00

WARNING!!! Minor Spoilers for the Call of Cthulhu scenario, "What's in the Cellar"

Our players are introduced to this case, a mysterious murder, with one player's cousin as the main sus...

One-Shots 1 - Call of Cthulhu, Characters and Rules from 2019-09-30T15:00

Welcome. Our players today try a horror mystery, playing a Demo from Call of Cthulhu, What's in the Cellar. Find this and other free scenarios at the Listen

NSFW!! Bloopisode 4-6 from 2019-09-28T15:00

Here are the bloopers from the Heroes game! WARNING!!! Not safe for work, public, children, etc.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.pa...

HNC 9 - The Night of the Horrible Accents! from 2019-09-26T15:00

This time, our heroes enter the party, and encounter a badly done French accent, a badly done Russian accent, a horrible Scottish accent, and an oddly not so bad old Southern Matron accent.
...

HNC 8 - A Failure To Plan... from 2019-09-19T15:00

In this episode, our heroes decide to train so they can get ready to get the magical thing, and decide to find out more about this magical thing and where it is. They find out about where it is,...

HNC 7 - Booze News from 2019-09-18T15:00

This time, our heroes swap some alcohol for some information, and find a connection to their pasts in their future quest. And to get ready for that quest and a little more used to their powers, ...

NSFW!!! Bloopisode 3-23 from 2019-09-13T15:00

Here are the bloopers! Enjoy!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.patreon.com/eslrpg

HNC 6 - Spacedollar!!! from 2019-09-12T15:00

We are back to our Heroes of New Cydonia campaign! First, Jerry must find the gang, but no one is at the hideout! It seems Nasher and Frankie went to another bank, and Mika and Omar went looking...

JD 13 - Wizards and Smiths from 2019-09-10T23:01:38

This time, we experience our shortest combat so far, help the man who is a chicken, talk with the wizard about his goods, and discuss something special for Arry with the blacksmith.

Slo...

JD 12 - Of Birds and Cats from 2019-09-05T15:00

In this episode, everyone finally gets lunch. Then, they go to High Hedge in search of one sword, find another sword, and then help a chicken.

Seriously. Next one, some kind of quest to...

JD 11 - Talking Through Deadly Issues from 2019-09-03T15:00

In this episode, Silky tries to solve her problems with stabbing, Heagle tries to solve his problems with forced prayer, Jan tries to solve his problems with stabbing and theft, Meg tries to sol...

NSFW!!! Bloopisode 3-9 from 2019-08-30T15:00

Here is the blooper reel where I just don't care about censorship anymore. So I can't say this enough, NOT FOR KIDS OR WORK!!!!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

JD 10 - Headaches from 2019-08-29T15:00

In this episode, there is a problem with a bill, everyone thinks about lunch, flowers are given, someone is looking for mercenaries, and everyone has a confusing and suspicious conversation.

JD 9 - Philosophy with Daggers and Lies from 2019-08-27T15:00

In this episode, our heroes fight off the ambush! This leads to first one philosophical question that tests the party when they take prisoners, then another philosophical question when it is tim...

JD 8 - A Horrible Joke from 2019-08-25T15:00

In this episode, our heroes fight the spider queen, Arry makes an awful joke, people pillage barrels full of rain water, and a spider corpse with a flower bundle makes an old woman happy. S...

JD 7 - Talking To Purdue from 2019-08-22T15:00

In this episode, our heroes talk to a man about a sword, find the house with the spiders, find many spiders inside the house, make one smile, make a mess, and clean it up.

But it seems ...

JD 6 - Maybe Ogres Allowed from 2019-08-15T15:00

Our heroes fight off yet another assassin! It seems like this will be a recurring thing! They also argue about fighting, argue with a bartender about who can and can't drink, have breakfast, go ...

JD 5 - To Beregost! from 2019-08-08T15:00

It has been a long time, so this episode starts with a summary. After that, our heroes travel to Beregost to complete the quest of the spiders. They find a lot of things along the way, bury some...

Bloopisode 07/2019 from 2019-08-02T03:00

Here we are at our cutest, most talking about babies, most disgustingly wrong, and most off topic. Enjoy, but maybe not at work.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

TTC 26 - Establishing Stuff and Things from 2019-07-17T03:41:37

In this episode, our players forget characters' names, decide torture works best when you ask questions, go looking for gold and prizes, and plan what to do later.

Also, we have a Patreon...

TTC 25 - Ugly Left Feet from 2019-07-04T13:58:09

In this episode, Bob gets dark, a formidable foe is faced, insults fly, and folk die. Yup. Just so slowly and horribly.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

TTC 24 - Under the Guild from 2019-06-28T12:50:26

Branch hallways are investigated, arguments are had, plans are made, and the team meet the guild under the guild in the guild hall. And start surprise negotiations. With many distractions.

TTC 23 - A Contest Most Macabre from 2019-06-18T13:33:02

In this episode, the bear goes away peacefully while scaring everyone, the giant golden retriever returns, Korgan and Shagrat do something very competitive and also very disgusting, and the brea...

TTC 22 - Bears and Bakeries from 2019-06-11T09:26:17

Exactly what the title says. Our noble adventurers invade a bakery, and encounter a very unusual patron. To be fair, there are no bear puns.

But pants get soiled, people hide, fire happ...

TTC 21 - Philosophical Cows from 2019-06-03T15:00

On this episode, the bar fight is finished rather abruptly, the gang travel to Whitehall, and find a debate about the realistic nature of a fake real cow.  Because magic.  Also job int...

TTC 20 - Travel Plans Interrupted from 2019-05-30T15:00

Our intrepid band of adventurers sit down at a bar, and plan a return to Whitehall and the mage's guild together with Harold! But it seems adventure comes to them, with a rowdy barfight of over ...

NSFW TTC Bloopisode 1 from 2019-05-22T15:00

I said last time, that recording got downright raunchy. Now you can see a bit what I mean!

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.patreon....

NSFW JD Bloopisode 1 from 2019-05-21T15:00

We went overboard, but on the plus-side, established George Carlin rules for what words you can't say on the podcast.

Also, just so many tits.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

A Little Naughty TTC 19 - Who Likes Hot Pants? from 2019-05-20T11:27:26

Warning! This episode contains a lot of suggestion of sexual situations (but none actually.) The dirtiest things were removed before upload, to later be included in a bloopisode.

In ...

TTC 18 - An Ill-Advised Sparring Match from 2019-05-15T08:21:50

On this episode, Bob meets Harry, then James, Dreg fights Red, and Shagrat comes in at an inopportune moment, all leading to a possibly interesting proposal.

Also, we have a Patreon at: Listen

TTC 17 - 6 Damage to the Crown Jewels from 2019-05-09T15:00

This time, on ESL RPG, there is a fight underground, people are tied up, people meet up, and people get confused. Bob. Bob gets confused.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

TTC 16 - Goblins, Catfolk, and Lizardfolk, Oh My! from 2019-05-02T15:00

In this episode, first we try a new system for the episode preview. Let us know what you think!

Also, going through the traps, meeting the boss, the temptation of sooooo much gold, and, p...

TTC 15 - The Revenge of the Backlog! from 2019-04-25T15:00

This week we start with news of good things for the future, hopefully. But new equipment means going through old recordings very fast!

In this episode, better plans than just attacking ...

JD 4 - Lots of Searching from 2019-04-18T15:00

In this episode, A crying halfling tells her story, there are no hugs, there is an impromptu vocabulary lesson, lots of things are searched for, and players discuss the beliefs of their characte...

JD 3 - Very Predictable Results from 2019-04-11T15:00

In this episode, the ogre sleeps tonight, the players argue, gold is gotten, and meat is eaten.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

https://www.pat...

JD 2 - Ogre Bull Dozer from 2019-04-04T15:00

This time, a dagger is pulled, an ogre is sorry, Arry is confused, Sabazios is frustrated, the woods are explored, and belts are spotted on an angry not-good ogre.

Also, we have a Patreon...

JD 1 - Strange Partners in Travel from 2019-03-28T15:00

Here the adventure begins, with an escape from Candlekeep for... Wait, the main character is really named Meg Ryan? 

 ...Ok... And while escaping she meets... a half-crazed herm...

JD - Character Creation, Mai and Ryan from 2019-03-21T15:00

Finishing up our lineup of characters, Mai puts the final touches on her wizard, and Ryan builds a Lovecraftian warlock.

Next time will be the first adventure, with our characters meeti...

JD Character Creation - Juan, Tomoyo, and Mai from 2019-03-14T15:00

Here, we meet our first characters, as three of our players put them together.
Yup, this is another long character creation upload.  And there will be one more, hopefully not so long! Listen

Jeff's Door - What Campaign is This? from 2019-03-07T22:55:26

After a long break, we are back with a new game series!  Don't worry, The Teacher's Campaign and Heroes of New Cydonia will continue, as will short one-shots as they happen.

In thi...

Analysis, The First: Dungeons and Dragons vs ICONS from 2019-01-31T15:00

This episode is particularly for teachers and students, an episode looking at what was most interesting or fun, what was easier to pick up and learn, and recommendations for students who want to...

All the Heroes of New Cydonia Bloopers from 2019-01-24T15:00

Here are the bloopers from the last several episodes.  We will likely return to ICONS, but for now will return to the original Dungeons and Dragons campaign

Also, we have a Patreon a...

HNC 5: The Shopping Continues, with Exciting Results! from 2019-01-17T15:00

On this week's episode, our heroes go clothes shopping, electronics shopping, and home and garden shopping.

Ok, I know that doesn't sound exciting, but I promise it is.  There will...

HNC 4: The Escape of Questionable Quality or Out of Haven and Back In Again from 2019-01-10T15:00

In this episode, our heroes escape into the wilderness, meet a mysterious stranger, find an even more mysterious and stranger business card, go back into Haven, and one of our heroes are dragged...

HNC 3: A Nervous Leader Appears! from 2019-01-03T15:00

Happy New Year!
On this week's episode, the return of the Magical Toilet, a leader named Jerry, cleanup at the bank, the police arrive, Frankie is Frankie, Omar is Omar, and people get out.<...

HNC 2: Where Is The Leader? from 2018-12-27T15:00

On this week's episode, our heroes are out of the toilet, a questionable amount of force is applied, the group has some in-fighting, the police are on the way, and someone drools in a bullet-wou...

HNC 1: The Magical Toilet of Not Kubrick from 2018-12-20T15:00

In this episode, the game starts off! Four of the group meet in a bank, then meet a god (Not Kubrick) in the toilet, and get superpowers. But what will they do with those superpowers? That's gon...

Meet the Heroes from 2018-12-16T10:46:59

In this episode, we are introduced to our heroes. Yeah, that's it really. I hope these characters will... well, do something.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

Heroes of New Cydonia, Rolling Heroes from 2018-12-06T15:00

In this episode, the players roll stats for their characters, the dice-gods summon a game breaker, the world is introduced in more detail, questions are asked, and options are laid for how the c...

Introduction to ICONS from 2018-11-29T15:00

Our group of players will try a short one-shot campaign while our friends in America are busy. For this campaign, we will be trying ICONS, a superhero RPG. You can find out more about ICONS at: ...

Bloopisode 11/2018 from 2018-11-22T15:00

This episode is a massive, two session bloopisode. It includes many cries of "Proprietary!", several bleeps, so many double entendres, and things that just made us laugh in the worst possible wa...

TTC 14- "He Talks To Plants!" from 2018-11-15T15:00

On this episode, a narrow escape, information gathered, supplies collected, and plans started. There will be a gap until the next story episode, so from next week, enjoy bloopers!

Listen

TTC 13- Misadventures in Bad Ideas from 2018-11-08T15:00

Our band of possibly heroes make marketing pitches, and heroic but ill-advised decisions, as Korgan and Bob convince someone to sell products for them, and Dreg and Shagrat try to take on a thie...

TTC 12- Arriving in That Town from 2018-11-01T15:00

In this episode, our party arrives at their destination, they learn more about the local geography, thieves are caught, drinks are had, and marketing is leveled.

Also, we have...

TTC 11- A Big Smelly Fire from 2018-10-25T15:00

On this episode of ESL RPG, something big comes out of the woods, a trap is set, big scary things all around, something goes woof, and people get fed. Oh, and the group continues on to the town,...

TTC 10- Herbal Medicine? from 2018-10-18T16:00

On this week's episode, Alton goes crazy, we finally leave, getting ready to sleep, questionable things to sleep with, and maybe human tetris

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

TTC 9- A New Quest from 2018-10-11T15:23:13

On this week's episode, it's back to the campaign. Korgan proves to be a greedy negotiator, Bob Jr. gets some skin on his bones (kinda), 320 pounds of gold flies through the air, and... a fetch ...

TTC 0- Welcome to The Teacher's Campaign from 2018-10-04T16:00

Here we meet our characters, hear their stories, the story of the world, and we learn how everyone got on the road to this tavern in the first place.

Also, we have a Patreon a...

TTC 8- More Tavern Talk from 2018-09-27T15:00

On this week's episode of ESL RPG, our heroes meet back in the tavern after... well, much longer than an afternoon. Shagrat explodes, Korgan reluctantly dances with wolves, Alton falls asleep ag...

Bloopisode 09/2018 from 2018-09-20T15:00

Here is the most recent batch of bloopers, complete with some from episodes yet to be released! Don't worry, no spoilers, just so many questions.

Also, we have a Patreon at: Listen

TTC 5- Oh, Brother Gomez from 2018-09-13T20:00

This episode is a return to the tavern, with serious conversations between our team, between the exploding barn, and the search for Marcello. Also, the team looks for Alton, finds a temple, and ...

TTC 7- Bones Out, Bones In from 2018-09-06T20:00

On this weeks episode, The 1s return, muggers turned in, loot looked through, Marcello is returned, Bob Jr. is found, the price of a book, and secrets... Also, bloopers.

Also,...

TTC 6- Anti-Bedwetting Boxers from 2018-08-30T20:00

On this week's episode, Finding Marcello, The Search for Bob Jr., some selfish squirrels, a very stupid mugger and his much smarter friends, and some special underwear. And yes, this episode is ...

TTC 4- 400 Beady Black Holes from 2018-08-23T21:00

On this episode of ESL RPG, the Pied Piper of Skeletons, an interesting and questionable experiment, the best reason to make bad decisions, a barn goes boom, a possible new companion runs away, ...

TTC 3- So Many Bones, So Few Hits from 2018-08-16T21:00

On this episode, Alton runs off to the monastery, the team return to the barn, we actually learn people's names, skeleton rats, a skeleton minotaur, and maybe a new friend.

Al...

TTC 2- Skeleton Baseball from 2018-08-09T21:00

A barn aflame, a giant good boy, one more party member, flying bones, a sudden cutoff, and bloopers! Also, the dog makes a return.

Also, we have a Patreon at:

Listen

The Teacher's Campaign 1- The Adventure Begins from 2018-08-02T21:00

A stash of secrets, a face of fire, and the best reason to join a group ever, come together to make a great start. Also coming together, new editing style, small technical difficulties, and "Wha...

The Half Orc Bard from 2018-07-26T21:00

This episode covers character creation, and forming parties before games start. On this episode, a character is created, a small party is formed, and someone looks down while looking up.

...

ESL RPG, The Introduction from 2018-07-17T08:00

Thank you for downloading and listening! Here is the first episode answering many questions, like, Who are these crazy people? What is this weird idea? Why should I listen? and, What are you eve...