Podcasts by Matthew and Paul
Join Matthew and Paul, an interabled couple navigating life, love, and disability. Paul is blind and Matthew is fully sighted. They may do things a little differently, but they are just like everyone else: They make accommodations; adjust to each other’s needs; and work as a team. More info at: http://patreon.com/matthewandpaul
Further podcasts by Matthew and Paul
Podcast on the topic Beziehungen
All episodes
The Next Chapter from 2023-04-28T17:46:40
Matthew and Paul have a big announcement about the future of His and His. After 3 years of weekly audio podcasts, Matthew and Paul are turning their attention to a YouTube channel that will feat...
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Gay TV, Part 2: The Shows That Inspired Us from 2023-03-20T16:25:28
In Part 2 of their discussion, Paul reveals how Dawson’s Creek and Will & Grace (both of which premiered in 1998) not only blazed a trail for public perception of gay people, but inspired hi...
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Gay TV: The Shows That Inspired Us from 2023-03-13T07:00:34
Matthew and Paul discuss the fictional gay characters and television storylines that inspired them during their coming-out years. Matthew recalls discovering Luke and Noah on the daytime soap op...
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Family Time from 2023-03-06T08:00:24
Matthew and Paul are taking the week off to celebrate the birthday of Paul’s brother, who died of a drug overdose last year. Thank you for your love and support.
Support this podcast on P...
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Ask Us Anything: Penguins, Podcasting, and Past Mistakes from 2023-02-28T00:28:32
Matthew and Paul answer listener-submitted questions about life, relationships, and past mistakes. Matthew reveals his desire to move to Canada, while Paul addresses the query, “Why penguins?” (...
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Silent Retreat: Priests and Peace from 2023-02-13T22:13:24
On this bonus episode of His and His, Matthew describes his experiences while attending a silent retreat (that ultimately changed his life). Matthew then reveals he will be attending another ret...
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Gay Movies: The Films That Inspired Us from 2023-02-06T08:00:56
Matthew and Paul are discussing the first gay-themed movies they ever watched. Matthew describes discovering the film “Latter Days” while on a brief trip away from home (and out from under the w...
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Ask Us Anything: Fights and First Dates from 2023-01-30T08:00:59
Matthew and Paul are answering some of your most burning questions. “How did you meet?”, “How to get over a straight crush?”, “Who is the first to make up after a fight?” and more.
On the...
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Gay Theatre: Performances That Inspired Us from 2023-01-23T19:08:28
Matthew and Paul are discussing the gay-themed stage performances that inspired, awakened, and terrified them at pivotal moments in their childhoods. Matthew describes seeing male ballet dancers...
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Our Foster Care Journey (So Far) from 2023-01-16T08:00:48
Matthew and Paul discuss their foster care journey which began one year ago. Matthew describes a recent conversation with a friend who grew up in the foster care system, while Paul explains what...
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The Paul Castle Project: Life Before Diagnosis from 2023-01-09T08:00:06
In this, Part 2 of The Paul Castle Project, Paul describes the “8 awkward years” between the first signs of blindness at age 8 and his final diagnosis at age 16. From failing at sports, to rando...
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Gay and Interabled: How Disability Shapes Our Relationship REVISITED from 2023-01-02T08:00:13
Matthew and Paul are talking about their lives as an interabled couples. Paul explains how his visual impairment affected his dating experience, while Matthew explains his initial thoughts and c...
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What Did 2022 Teach Us? from 2022-12-27T01:39:46
Matthew and Paul are wishing you a Happy New Year, as well as taking a look back to answer the question: What did 2022 teach us?
Unlock extended episodes: Patreon.com/hisandhis
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Dating and Relationship Questions from 2022-12-19T08:01:24
In Part 2 of their conversation, Matthew and Paul continue using the virtual deck of cards created by the Gottman Institute in order to deepen connection and improve intimacy.
On the ext...
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Fight or Flight: How We Recover from 2022-12-12T10:01:23
Matthew and Paul use a special deck of cards created by the Gottman Institute in order to deepen their connection and increase intimacy.
On the extended episode Matthew and Paul ans...
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Has Marriage Changed Our Relationship? from 2022-12-05T17:11:39
As Matthew and Paul celebrate 3 years of marriage (and a total of 6 years together) they answer the question, “Has marriage changed our relationship?”
On the extended episode Matthe...
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Our Wedding Day REVISITED from 2022-11-29T00:38:36
Matthew and Paul reflect on the day they became husbands. Matthew reveals the one thing that stressed him our the most, while Paul recounts a moment that left everyone in tears. At the end of th...
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Gay Books: Stories That Inspired Us from 2022-11-21T08:00:34
Matthew and Paul are discussing the gay-themed books that inspired them during important life moments. Matthew talks about discovering the book “Call Me By Your Name” by Andre Aciman, while Paul...
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One Year With Mr. Maple from 2022-11-14T08:00:16
Matthew and Paul celebrate one year with Paul’s guide dog, Mr. Maple. Matthew describes his relationship with Paul’s service animal, while Paul discusses the many positive changes Maple has made...
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Paul Castle Project: The First Sign of Blindness from 2022-10-31T07:00:58
Introducing a new brand new series chronically Paul’s unique experience with a rare form of blindness. In this first episode Paul describes the very moment he knew something was wrong with his v...
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A Cure is in Sight from 2022-10-24T07:00:43
Matthew and Paul reflect on their trip to San Diego where Paul participated in the second stage of a gene therapy trial that may offer a treatment for Retinitis Pigmentosa. Paul describes the Hu...
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Coming Out, Again…and Again and Again from 2022-10-17T07:00:40
In honor of National Coming Out Day, Matthew and Paul share the stages of coming out as gay. From being called “gay”, to accepting their sexuality, to coming out and being outed — Matthew and Pa...
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HEARTSTOPPER Ep 8: Boyfriend from 2022-10-10T07:00:57
Matthew and Paul discuss the 8th and final episode of the gay Netflix series Heartstopper. Matthew describes the feeling of “disappearing” as a gay man in certain settings, while Paul relates to...
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HEARTSTOPPER Ep 7: Bully from 2022-10-03T07:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the penultimate episode of Heartstopper, the gay coming of age series currently streaming on Netflix. Paul shares details about his own bullying experiences in public schoo...
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Changing Our Last Name from 2022-09-26T15:49:53
Matthew and Paul discuss the history of changing surnames after marriage. Paul talks about different customs around the world, while Matthew describes what modern gay couples choose to do. Final...
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Gene Therapy Update: The Human Maze from 2022-09-19T07:01:07
Matthew and Paul are taking the week off as they travel to San Diego for the next stage of Paul’s gene therapy clinical trial. Paul will be walking through a human maze in order to assess his pr...
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Ask Us Anything: Gay Dads and Pranks from 2022-09-12T07:01:07
“Are you criticized for meeting on Grindr?”, “How do you plan to have kids?”, and “Do you pull pranks on each other?” Matthew and Paul answer these and other listener-submitted questions on this...
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HEARTSTOPPER Ep 6: Girls from 2022-09-06T07:00:02
Matthew and Paul discuss episode 6 of the gay Netflix series Heartstopper. This recap inspires conversations about coming out, toxic allies, and showing affection in public.
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When Type A Marries Type B from 2022-08-29T07:01:07
On this Bonus episode of His and His, Matthew and Paul discuss a treatment for Paul’s blindness, the difference between Type A and Type B personalities, and whether they buy each other gifts on ...
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A Message From Paul from 2022-08-24T07:01:26
I am excited to announce the Kickstarter campaign for my new children’s book, “The Secret Ingredient”, a story that celebrates LGBTQ families.
You can learn more about the project a...
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Paul’s New LGBTQ Kids Book from 2022-08-22T07:00:05
Matthew talks to Paul about his brand new children’s book project, “The Secret Ingredient”, a whimsical story that celebrates LGBTQ families through the eyes of two adorable penguins….who just h...
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HEARTSTOPPER EP 5: Friends from 2022-08-15T07:00
Matthew and Paul continue their episode-by-episode discussion of the gay Netflix series, Heartstopper. This episode of the series, titled “Friend”, inspires conversations about gay PDA, breaking...
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110: Life Update: Homophobia and Humphrey Bogart from 2022-04-18T10:00
On this bonus episode of “His and His” Matthew and Paul discuss a variety of topics that are weighing on their minds this week. From internet homophobia to “Don’t Say Gay” to an update on Matt...
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109: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 9: Pardon Me? from 2022-04-11T10:00
On the final installment of Paul Goes to Prison, Paul describes the moment he was released from jail and dropped off at a bus station in the snowy mountains of British Columbia. Paul discusses...
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108: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 8: Never Piss Off the Alpha from 2022-04-04T10:00
In the penultimate episode of Paul Goes to Prison, Paul describes his final week in the Bug Ward. He reflects on the friendships he made, the lessons learned, and the necessity of forgiveness....
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107: Coming Out vs Being Outed (Revisited) from 2022-03-28T10:00
In light of Florida’s “Don’t Say Gay” bill, Matthew and Paul revisit a previous episode in which they discuss the pivotal difference between coming out and being outed by someone else. While t...
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106: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 7: Naked and Afraid from 2022-03-21T10:00
In Part 7 of Paul’s true prison saga, Paul describes what life was like in solitary confinement. From his interactions with other inmates in the solitary wing, to meeting with the prison psych...
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105: Dispatches From Social Media: Love Always Wins from 2022-03-14T10:00
Matthew and Paul revisit a few of their favorite posts from social media. Matthew reflects on his first date with Paul and how their creative bond laid the foundation for their entire relation...
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104: Life Update: Dads, Daddies, and The Duggars from 2022-03-07T11:00
Matthew and Paul are speaking off the cuff and from the heart in this special “life update” episode of His and His. Matthew discusses the challenges and surprising relationship benefits of bei...
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103: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 6: Wicked Witch of the Ward from 2022-02-28T11:00
Paul explains the difficult decision to plead guilty to the crime for which he was arrested, and how instead of being released from prison he quickly found himself in solitary confinement. Pau...
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102: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 5: Life in The Bug Ward from 2022-02-21T11:00
Paul describes how it felt to earn the trust of the two prison Alphas, Seven and The Colonel, and how his role in the Bug Ward began to change. Then Paul explains how his best friend, Spud, he...
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101: Do I Sound Gay? (Revisited) from 2022-02-14T11:00
What does it mean to “sound gay”? Matthew and Paul discuss the first time they heard a gay voice, and how they reacted to it. Matthew describes being drawn to outwardly gay personalities from ...
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100: Gay Milestones: Sex, Celebrations, and Saying I Do from 2022-02-07T11:00
Matthew and Paul celebrate the milestone of 100 podcast episodes by sharing their favorite “milestone moments”. From losing their virginities, to coming out as gay, and deciding to get married...
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99: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 4: Shanks and Showers from 2022-01-31T11:00
Paul describes his first encounter with The Colonel, a powerful inmate who plotted an attack on him in the shower. Paul instructs Matthew on how to make a traditional prison weapon (called a s...
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98: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 3: Canteen, Candy, and The Colonel from 2022-01-24T08:00
In Part 3 of his true story, Paul describes a typical day in a maximum security prison. Meanwhile, Paul recalls the struggle of deciding whether to plead guilty and be freed; or plead innocent...
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97: Love Language, Part 2: Down On All Fours from 2022-01-18T11:00
Matthew and Paul continue their discussion about Love Languages. Matthew explains the meaning of “Quality Time” (hint: no phones allowed!) while Paul speaks candidly about his use of the words...
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96: Love Language: Kisses, Cuddles, and Kindness from 2022-01-10T11:00
Matthew and Paul are discussing Love Languages. After Paul explains the origin of the popular term, Matthew describes why “Acts of Kindness” are his Love Language. Paul’s, meanwhile, is “Touch...
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95: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 2: Don’t Eat the Soup from 2022-01-03T11:00
Paul’s harrowing saga picks up on Day 1 of 100 in a maximum security prison. Paul describes the humiliating intake process, what it means to “squat and cough”, and how it felt walking into the...
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94: His and His Holiday from 2021-12-27T11:00
Matthew and Paul are discussing their favorite holiday traditions. Matthew reveals his love for the 1982 animated short The Snowman, while Paul does his best to defend the merits of the 1964 c...
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93: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 1: Arrested and Arraigned from 2021-12-20T11:00
Paul shares, for the first time, the story of his arrest and detainment in a maximum security prison. Paul reveals the circumstances of his arrest; how it felt to stand before a judge with his wris...
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93: Paul Goes to Prison, Part 1: Arrested and Arraigned from 2021-12-20T11:00
Paul shares, for the first time, the story of his arrest and detainment in a maximum security prison. Paul reveals the circumstances of his arrest; how it felt to stand before a judge with his...
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92: Why We Turned Down a Reality Show: Part 2 from 2021-12-13T11:00
Matthew and Paul continue their conversation about Reality TV, specifically the series upon which they were offered major roles. Matthew describes the premise of the show and whether he believ...
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91: Why We Turned Down a Reality Show: Part 1 from 2021-12-06T11:00
Matthew and Paul were recently offered a reality show on a major streaming platform, and on today’s bonus episode they reveal the premise of the show and why they turned it down. But first, Ma...
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90: Talk Therapy (Revisited) from 2021-11-29T11:00
Matthew and Paul revisit their first discussion about talk therapy. Paul remembers his first therapy session in a church basement, while Matthew describes how Dialectic Behavior Therapy change...
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89: Six Things You Should Be Doing Right Now to Land Your Man from 2021-11-22T11:00
Matthew and Paul are discussing online dating profiles. Matthew reveals the one thing about Paul’s Grindr profile that really got his attention, while Paul explains why Matthew’s “consistency”...
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88: Life Update: Covid, Canines, and Christmas from 2021-11-15T19:30:21
Matthew and Paul are sick with Covid-19. Matthew describes the worst of his symptoms, while Paul reveals his opinion on booster shots. Matthew and Paul also discuss their first week home with ...
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87: 3 Dating Mistakes You Probably Didn’t Know You Were Making from 2021-11-08T11:00
Matthew and Paul are revealing the dating mistakes they wish they’d known when they came out as gay. Matthew reveals how long he should have waited to move in with his first boyfriend (as oppo...
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86: Paul’s Return to Guide Dog Training from 2021-11-01T10:00
On this special bonus episode of His and His, Matthew calls Paul at Guide Dog training in Oregon to catch up on his first week of class. Paul discusses what it was like returning to the traini...
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85: Paul’s Guide Dog Journey (Revisited) from 2021-10-25T10:00
As Paul returns to Guide Dog training in Oregon this week, Matthew is at home in Seattle reflecting on Paul’s first Guide Dog experience. In this revisit, Paul reflects on his first dog, what ...
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84: Becoming Dads: Worst Fears, Sudden Tears from 2021-10-18T10:00
Matthew and Paul continue their conversation about becoming dads through surrogacy. Who would they choose to be the biological dad? What kind of relationship would they like to have with their...
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83: Becoming Dads: Let’s Talk About Surrogacy from 2021-10-11T10:00
On this Ask Me Anything episode, Matthew and Paul are answering questions about surrogacy. Matthew expresses his concerns about raising a child in 2021, while Paul reveals why (and why not) a ...
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82: Our Family is Getting Bigger: Part 2 from 2021-10-04T10:00
Matthew and Paul are sharing an exciting life update on today’s episode of His and His.
If you would like to hear the extended episode, consider becoming a member of the His and His ... Listen
If you would like to hear the extended episode, consider becoming a member of the His and His ... Listen
81: Dispatches from Social Media: Beds, Bookstores, and Bathrooms from 2021-09-27T10:00
Matthew and Paul are taking a deep-dive into their favorite social media posts. Matthew explains why they sleep in a queen size bed, while Paul reveals how he found sobriety before he found lo...
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80: Public Sex Challenge: Did We Succeed or Fail? from 2021-09-20T10:00
Matthew and Paul challenged each other to a “public sex experiment” on a previous bonus episode, and today they are sharing the experience moment-by-moment. Paul explains his biggest concerns ...
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79: Let’s Talk About Sex: Crude, Clinical, and Casual from 2021-09-13T10:00
Matthew and Paul reveal why they believe it’s important to have frank and honest conversations about sex. Matthew describes how sex was discussed in his religious childhood home, while Paul ex...
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78: His and His Mailbag: Inner Gayness and Outdoor Sex from 2021-09-06T10:00
Matthew and Paul are turning the spotlight on you, the listeners. What does celebrating Pride mean to you? What is the strangest place you’ve ever had sex? What was your coming out “escape pla...
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77: Blind Dates: Gay and Disabled (Revisited) from 2021-08-30T10:00
Matthew and Paul reveal how blindness affects their marriage, and the many ways in which they’ve adjusted to Paul’s visual impairment. Paul also reflects on dating with a disability, bringing ...
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76: Matthew’s Escape Plan: No Man is an Island from 2021-08-23T10:00
Paul interviews Matthew about his coming out “escape plan”. Matthew opens up about life in a religious cult, and how he formed a plan to leave it behind. Matthew also visits the house from whi...
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75: Paul’s Escape Plan: Coming Out and Getting Out from 2021-08-16T10:00
Matthew interviews Paul about his coming out “escape plan”. Paul reveals what his home environment was like when he accepted his sexuality, and describes his fears of being discovered. Finally...
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74: Dispatches from Social Media: Butts, Braille, and Verbotene Liebe from 2021-08-09T10:00
Matthew and Paul have been posting to social media for the past 18 months, sharing personal stories and daily reflections with their growing audience. This week, Matthew and Paul are discussin...
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73: Let’s Talk About Kinks: Public Sex from 2021-08-02T10:00
Matthew and Paul are discussing the kink of public sex. Matthew describes some of the many reasons public sex is fetishized, while Paul explains the difference between exhibitionism and agorap...
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72: Gay Bathhouses: Silver Daddies and Steam Rooms from 2021-07-26T10:00
Matthew and Paul continue their conversation about gay bathhouses. Matthew addresses his experience with shame and homosexuality, while Paul describes his first experience in a gay bathhouse.<...
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71: Gay Bathhouses: Red Lights and Dark Rooms from 2021-07-19T10:00
Matthew and Paul are discussing gay bathhouses. How did the gay bathhouse rise in prominence? Paul reveals several key moments in bathhouse history, while Matthew describes his own personal ex...
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70: Celebrating Pride: Leather Daddies and Unthinkable Depravity from 2021-07-12T10:00
Matthew and Paul are celebrating Pride by recounting their first Pride Parade memories. Matthew describes how he accidentally attended Pride shortly after coming out as gay, while Paul reminis...
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69: Sex in Strange Places: Planes, Trains,&Automobiles from 2021-07-05T10:00
Matthew and Paul are discussing sex in unusual locations. Matthew describes the first time he had sex in public, while Paul does a deep dive on The Mile High Club. Matthew and Paul also announ...
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68: The Story of Us: Remembering Our Past to Strengthen Our Present from 2021-06-28T10:00
Matthew and Paul are revisiting their origin story as an exercise in strengthening their bond. This is a practice called “The Story of Us” and is just one of the tools espoused by renowned rel...
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67: Masturbation Part 2: The Tortured Tightrope Walk from 2021-06-21T10:00
Matthew and Paul continue their discussion about masturbation. Paul reveals the movie he watched the first time he used his hand for self-pleasure, while Matthew describes an early experience ...
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66: Ask Me Anything: How to Find Your Soulmate on Grindr from 2021-06-14T10:00
On this month’s Ask Me Anything episode, Matthew and Paul are discussing religion, dating apps, and finding “the one”. Paul explains what it was like growing up in a born-again Christian envir...
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65: The Husband Tag: Shag, Marry, Kill from 2021-06-07T10:00
Matthew and Paul are doing their first official Husband Tag. Matthew debates which famous “Chris” Paul would marry if given the chance, while Paul reveals the one thing Matthew does during an ...
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64: Our First Date: Sex and Smoothies (Revisited) from 2021-05-31T10:00
As Matthew and Paul approach the 5-year anniversary of their first date on June 10th. 2016, they revisit one of their favorite episodes of His and His called “Our First Date: Sex and Smoothies...
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63: Gay and Interabled: How Disability Shapes Our Relationship from 2021-05-24T10:00
Matthew and Paul are talking about their lives as an interabled couples. Paul explains how his visual impairment affected his dating experience, while Matthew explains his initial thoughts and...
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62: Confessions: Why We Cheated from 2021-05-17T10:00
Matthew and Paul are talking about cheating. They will answer the question, “What counts as cheating?”, plus reveal times they both had emotional affairs in previous relationships.
61: Masturbation: Wet Dreams and Dry Humping from 2021-05-10T10:00
Matthew and Paul are discussing masturbation. Matthew describes how he first “discovered his own potential”, while Paul explains how a 90’s sitcom taught him that masturbation was perfectly no...
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60: Ask Me Anything: Christian Links and Sexual Kinks from 2021-05-03T10:00
On this week’s Ask Me Anything episode, Matthew and Paul are discussing their experiences as gay men who grew up in the Christian church. Matthew describes a fear of Hell that gripped him thro...
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59: PFLAG Moms and High School Proms from 2021-04-26T10:00
Matthew and Paul take turns reading messages from His and His listeners. Paul reacts to a North Dakota mom who used the podcast as a dinner table discussion with her “tolerant” husband and tee...
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58: Colton Underwood: The Gay Bachelor from 2021-04-19T10:00
Colton Underwood, former star of the reality series The Bachelor, came out as gay on national television this past week. On this special episode of His and His, Matthew and Paul discuss key po...
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57: Ask Me Anything: Romantic Games and Porn Star Names from 2021-04-12T10:00
On this week’s AMA episode, Matthew and Paul “surprise” each other with a grand romantic gesture. Later, Matthew opens up about the difficulties of leaving home after he escaped a religious cu...
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56: One Year Anniversary from 2021-04-05T10:00
Matthew and Paul reflect on their first year of hosting the His and His podcast. Paul remembers a moment that made him laugh until he cried, while Matthew recounts an episode that made him rea...
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55: 30 Days of Sex: Did We Succeed or Fail? from 2021-03-29T10:00
Matthew and Paul reveal the details of the 30-day “sexperiment” they launched on last month’s bonus episode, “Our Sex Life”. Matthew describes an unexpected result of the challenge, while Paul...
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54: Do I Sound Gay? Part 2 from 2021-03-22T10:00
Matthew and Paul continue their two-part discussion about gay voices. Matthew describes dating both masculine and feminine-sounding men, and Paul recounts a time he was rejected by a guy for s...
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53: Do I Sound Gay? from 2021-03-15T08:00
What does it mean to “sound gay”? Matthew and Paul discuss the first time they heard a gay voice, and how they reacted to it. Matthew describes being drawn to outwardly gay personalities from ...
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52: Naked and Nervous: Assumptions About Us from 2021-03-08T09:00
Matthew and Paul address your assumptions about their relationship. Is Matthew more outgoing? Does Paul sleep naked? Among the many assumptions, Matthew explains what it takes to strengthen a ...
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51: Dealing with Shame: Hooters and Hellfire from 2021-03-01T09:00
Matthew and Paul are tackling the topic of shame, specifically the kind of shame most gay people must reckon with at some point before, during, and after coming out. Matthew discusses how he d...
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50: Our Sex Life: Libidos and Laundry from 2021-02-22T09:00
Matthew and Paul are pulling back the curtain on their sex life. Matthew talks about the most sexually active period in his life, and Paul reveals the longest he’s gone without sex. Matthew an...
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49: Paul’s Guide Dog Journey: Pause, Probe, and Praise from 2021-02-15T09:00
On this week’s episode, Matthew interviews Paul about his experience at Guide Dogs for the Blind. Paul opens up about the new skills he learned, the challenges he faced, and the moment he real...
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48: Ask Me Anything: Pandemic Edition from 2021-02-08T09:00
On this Ask Me Anything episode, Matthew and Paul are discussing the ways in which their lives have been affected by the extended pandemic. What do they miss? What have they learned? And what ...
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47: Gay Conversion Therapy from 2021-02-01T09:00
In this episode of His and His, Paul interviews Matthew about his experience in Gay Conversion Therapy. Matthew explains why he was sent to the Ex-Gay conference and how he felt walking into t...
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46: Cheater, Cheater from 2021-01-25T09:00
Matthew and Paul are tackling the topic of cheating. Paul describes growing up in a home with unfaithful parents, and they both reveal the time they had emotional affairs. Listen to the entire...
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45: Why are Gay Men Attracted to Straight Guys? from 2021-01-18T09:00
Matthew and Paul address the gay fascination with straight and “straight-acting” men. Matthew describes how his religious upbringing caused him to develop “envy crushes” on straight men, while...
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44: Our Family is Getting Bigger from 2021-01-11T09:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the new addition to their family: A guide dog from Guide Dogs for the Blind. Paul explains why he applied for a guide dog, what breed they’ll be getting, and many more...
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43: Ask Me Anything: White Lies and Sexy Guys from 2021-01-04T09:00
Matthew and Paul are answering questions from the His and His Family on Patreon. Matthew explains the difference between a white lie and a grey lie, while Paul reveals what he’s least proud ab...
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42: The Art of Being Needy with Corey Lay from 2020-12-28T09:00
Matthew and Paul continue their conversation with reality star Corey Lay, who was recently featured on the HBO Max dating series “12 Dates of Christmas”. Corey describes his heightened emotion...
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41: Dating and Vulnerability with Corey Lay from 2020-12-21T09:00
Matthew and Paul are joined by Corey Lay, co-star of the holiday themed dating series “12 Dates of Christmas” currently streaming on HBO Max. Corey speaks candidly about coming out as gay at a...
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40: Our Wedding Day: Setting Suns and Sweaty Buns from 2020-12-14T09:00
This week, on their one-year wedding anniversary, Matthew and Paul reflect on the day they became husbands. Matthew reveals the one thing that stressed him out the most, while Paul recounts a ...
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39: How to Plan a Gay Wedding from 2020-12-07T09:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the details of their own wedding planning process. Matthew explains why he didn’t want a traditional ceremony, and Paul reveals how they decided on a destination weddi...
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38: Ask Me Anything: How Do You Keep it Interesting? from 2020-11-30T09:00
On this Ask Me Anything episode, Matthew discusses the challenges of maintaining relationships with ultra-religious family members, while Paul explains how flirting keeps a marriage interestin...
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37: PDA: Touching Pecs, Not Balls from 2020-11-23T09:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the pleasures and perils of showing PDA as a gay couple. They discuss the kinds of things straight couples might take for granted, as well as the dangers of opening a ...
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36: Most Embarrassing Dates from 2020-11-16T09:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the most embarrassing moments from the beginning of their relationship. Paul shares a cautionary story about food poisoning and flatulence, while Matthew explains how ...
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35: Coming Out vs. Being Outed from 2020-11-09T09:00
Matthew and Paul are discussing the difference between coming out as gay, and being outed by another person. Paul reveals a time he was outed by a vindictive ex in High School, while Matthew e...
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34: Sex on the First Date from 2020-11-02T09:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the topic of sex on the first date. Paul reveals a time he regretted his decision, while Matthew recounts a missed opportunity. Matthew and Paul also reveal the "sexy"...
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33: Homophobia: Sodomy and Sexuality from 2020-10-26T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss homophobia both through the lens of their childhood and their present realities. Matthew describes the time a straight man paid him a very unusual compliment, while Pa...
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32: Ask Me Anything: Big Fights and Guilty Pleasures from 2020-10-19T08:00
Welcome to another AMA courtesy of our Patreon Family. No question is too big, too small, or too personal. This week Matthew and Paul discuss their “worst” fights and how they managed to resol...
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31: Opposite-Sex Attraction: Kissing Girls and Shooting Squirrels from 2020-10-12T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss their histories with opposite-sex attraction. Paul reveals how societal pressure caused him to explore relationships with girls in High School, while Matthew describes...
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30: Top, Bottom, or Vers? from 2020-10-05T08:00
Matthew and Paul continue their discussion about sexual positions in the gay community. Matthew reveals why he thinks “Masc” and “Fem” stereotypes are problematic, and Paul describes the first...
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29: Sexual Positions: Where are all the Tops? from 2020-09-28T08:00
Matthew and Paul are talking about sexual positions in the gay community, specifically the idea of Top, Bottom, and Versatile. Are these labels strictly for the bedroom, or do they somehow ext...
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28: Ask Me Anything: Top and Bottom from 2020-09-21T08:00
Welcome to another Ask Me Anything episode courtesy of our Patreon Family. No question is too big, too small, or too personal. Matthew and Paul discuss their faith journeys, and whether they’l...
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27: Marriage Equality: Monks and Barbies from 2020-09-14T08:00
Matthew and Paul are talking about marriage equality. Paul reveals what it was like growing up in a world that didn’t recognize same-sex marriage, and Matthew explains his own feelings about c...
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26: Gay Dads: Surrogacy and Adoption from 2020-09-07T08:00
Matthew and Paul are talking about having kids! Matthew describes belonging to the same religious cult as The Duggars, who famously had 19 children (and a popular reality show), while Paul rev...
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25: Threesomes, Foursomes, and Moresomes from 2020-08-31T08:00
On this episode Matthew and Paul discuss their experiences with multiple partners. Paul remembers dating a guy who had a shower built for the sole purpose of fitting 5 guys in it. While Matthe...
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24: Ask Me Anything: College Boys and Throuples from 2020-08-24T08:00
Welcome to another Ask Me Anything episode courtesy of our Patreon Family. No question is too big, too small, or too personal. Matthew and Paul dive into their college experiences, reveal thei...
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23: Our Proposal Story: Surprising Bottoms On Mountain Tops from 2020-08-17T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the details of their own proposal story. Matthew explains how he pulled off the ultimate surprise, and Paul reveals the moment from his perspective.
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22: Gay Proposals: Down on Both Knees from 2020-08-10T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the topic of marriage proposals. Matthew reveals a childhood fantasy of being swept off his feet, while Paul reminisces about the romantic comedies that shaped his you...
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21: Pornography: Sin Juice and Family Jewels from 2020-08-03T08:00
Matthew and Paul are talking abut gay pornography. Paul remembers the moment he saw porn for the very first time, while Matthew describes the day he was caught watching porn on the family comp...
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20: Relationships: Friends Who Fight from 2020-07-27T08:00
Matthew and Paul are working on their relationship, and they spend this episode sharing the details of that journey. They discuss the importance of a foundational friendship, the use of “posit...
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19: Ask Me Anything: Warm Days, Hot Guys from 2020-07-20T08:00
Welcome to our first AMA, courtesy of the His and His Patreon Family. No question is too big, too small, or too personal. Matthew and Paul discuss their plans for the future, what inspires the...
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18: Hookups: One Night Stands and FWBs from 2020-07-13T08:00
Matthew and Paul dive head first into the topic of hookups. They reveal their best and worst hookup stories, and discuss the crucial differences between a hookup, F-buddy, and Friends With Ben...
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17: Life After Cult: Matthew’s Journey Out of Darkness from 2020-07-06T08:00
On last week’s episode, Paul interviewed Matthew about the 10 years he and his family spent in the Advanced Training Institute; a cult started by self-proclaimed prophet, Bill Gothard. This we...
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16: Survivor: 10 Years in a Cult from 2020-06-29T08:00
On this special episode of His and His, Paul interviews Matthew about the decade he and his family spent trapped in a religious cult. From boyhood until his early twenties, Matthew belonged to...
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15: Virginity: Pain and Pleasure from 2020-06-22T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss losing their virginity. Paul describes how his first time involved an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, while Matthew explains how losing his virginity led to a 5-y...
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14: Flirting: Locker Rooms and Elevators from 2020-06-15T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the many nuances of flirting. Matthew describes his favorite flirting story with a speedo-clad gymnast, and Paul talks candidly about an unwanted experience that forev...
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13: Talk Therapy: Attempting Suicide and Surviving Cults from 2020-06-08T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss their experience with talk therapy. Paul remembers his first therapy session in a church basement, while Matthew describes how Dialectic Behavior Therapy changed his l...
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12: Age Gap: Silver Daddies and Super Twinks from 2020-06-01T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss relationship age differences. Matthew reflects on his first LTR with an older man, which prompted him to start dating younger guys exclusively. Paul admits he’s never ...
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11: Blind Dates: Gay and Disabled from 2020-05-25T08:00
On last week’s episode, Paul discussed losing his vision to a rare genetic eye condition called Retinitis Pigmentosa. This week, Matthew and Paul continue their discussion by revealing how bli...
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10: Going Blind: Paul's Journey into Darkness from 2020-05-18T08:00
In this special episode of His and His, Matthew interviews Paul about the rare disease that is causing him to go permanently blind. We learn about the first signs of sight loss, and his eventu...
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9: Sexting: Straight Dudes and Leaked Nudes from 2020-05-11T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss the act and art of sexting. Matthew remembers the time his sexting almost landed him in the New York Times, and Paul reflects on his first sexting experience as a twee...
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8: Burning Questions: Our Biggest Fight from 2020-05-04T08:00
Matthew and Paul answer another round of burning questions. Matthew reveals more about his struggles in the cult and the emotional entanglements that made it so hard to leave. We hear how he w...
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7: Burning Questions: Bathtubs and Chest Rubs from 2020-04-27T08:00
Matthew and Paul answer your burning questions. Matthew reveals one of his biggest dreams, and Paul opens up about anxiety. They also discuss how life has changed—and stayed the same—during qu...
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6: Coming Out: Diaries and Daddy Issues from 2020-04-20T08:00
Matthew and Paul discuss their coming out stories. Matthew recounts being kicked out of his house for being gay, and Paul remembers the first time he felt proud of his sexuality. Also, Matthew...
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5: Sexual Awakenings: Jockstraps and Broomsticks from 2020-04-13T08:00
Matthew and Paul talk about the first time they experienced same-sex attraction. Matthew remembers walking through the underwear aisle as a child, and Paul recounts the moment he took ownershi...
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4: Kissing: Sodomites and Soap Operas from 2020-04-06T08:00
Matthew and Paul talk about their best, worst, and first kisses. Matthew describes a gay encounter in a religious cult when he was a teen, and Paul remembers his Disney-inspired first gay kiss...
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3: Online Dating: First Date Disasters from 2020-03-30T08:10
Matthew and Paul relive some of their best, worst, and weirdest dating stories.
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2: Our First Date: Sex and Smoothies from 2020-03-30T08:05
Matthew and Paul talk candidly about their first date. Paul reads from his journal, and Matthew reveals who made the first move.
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1: Online Dating: Punctuation to Penetration from 2020-03-30T08:00
Matthew and Paul talk about their experiences with online dating and dating apps like Grindr. They reveal stories they’ve never shared with each other before, and discuss the difference betwee...
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