@HomewithDean - Homily 11/21 - a podcast by KFI AM 640 (KFI-AM)

Great builders fit things together. But great designers—in my opinion—start with taking things apart. Deconstructing the room, the view, the emotions of a space. Peeling back the layers and deconstructing the moment of an experience in order to try and better understand it, discover its meaning, and find whatever poetry may be hiding there.

I was up very early this morning, sitting by the fire in the dark, half awake, quiet, listening to the wind gust outside and listening to the soft breathing of one of our beagles, Jackson, sleeping in the chair right next to me. I sipped my coffee and gazed through the living room window at some string lights and a tree we’ve already set up out on the front porch. Yes, we started early again this year, because, well, just because 2021. As I was staring at it all I could feel my emotions shifting to a better place and my breathing slowing and deepening. And because I was aware it was happening I tried to observe and deconstruct that moment to understand exactly why.

It started with an extremely simple observation: There’s something quite special about an evergreen tree standing in the dark against the cold and filled with sweet, shiny things, and twinkling lights. There just is. And I tried to remember if I’ve ever heard someone ever say they hate the look of a Christmas Tree, and I couldn’t. I’ve heard lots of folks rail against the holidays and shopping and materialism and religion and the baby Jesus and even Santa. And I also know—due to some very real trauma or depression or loss—there are folks who struggle through this time of year. But try as I might I could not think of a single time I’ve ever heard a single person say they hate looking at a Christmas Tree. And that felt like a discovery.

I think it means there’s something universally special about it. Something not merely tied to childhood memories or nostalgia or religion or tradition. And if that’s true and it transcends those things then the effect must be something more immediate, more intimate, more personal.

There is … something … quite special about an evergreen tree standing in the dark against the cold and filled with sweet, shiny things, and twinkling light. I wonder—and feel free to disagree, this is just a working hypothesis that I’ve never considered before this morning—but I wonder if somehow the tree is me.

I’m wondering if this tree is somehow an altar to my own life, to the life I want to live and to the person I want to be. A strong green vibrant thing standing in the dark, against the cold, carefully, skillfully ornamented and adorned with all manner of experiences and nuances, filled with light and magic and presiding over a treasure trove of gifts to be shared.

Every Fall as the year is winding down I wonder if we look back at who we’ve been and forward to who we still long to be and then build an altar to those hopes and dreams. I think we just might. Because apart from nostalgia or religion or tradition, everyone loves a Christmas Tree. There’s something quite special about a green vibrant thing standing in the dark against the cold, adorned with sweet, shiny things, and full of light.

I really don’t mean to offend anyone by saying this. I think everyone should celebrate exactly as they see fit. But maybe, just maybe everyone loves a Christmas Tree because we are the reason for the season. That we’ve survived another year. That despite our wounds and scars and loss, despite storms, fires, floods and heat, layoffs and loneliness, personal trials, pain, and a global pandemic … we are still here and still hopeful that our story is not yet over, that we can still do better, and that there is still hope. If that’s true it means WE are the vibrant beings standing in the dark against the cold, adorned with sweet, shiny things, full of light and gifts and hope, and ready, come the New Year, to get busy building ourselves a beautiful life.

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