When is 80% Not Enough? - a podcast by Laa Hotspot

from 2008-07-09T02:45:12

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A few of my friends are having some relationship issues. Without going into details, the one thing that they all have in common is that they feel like they are missing some crucial elements in the relationship. For the most part, they were at one point happy with the relationship and their partner in general. But over time, they realized that something that they felt they needed was missing. Suddenly, that need became so great that they were willing to sacrifice what they had to seek out what they didn't have.

I had always thought that this behavior was more common in men than women. However, according to my recent experience, it has become apparent that women have these feelings too. I thought that most women just kinda settled into their relationships, and lived them out until something devastating happened to make them want to leave. So, either the majority of my friends are not the average woman, or there are more women out there that are refusing to settle. I'm betting on the latter. This excites me. Well, kinda. I say that because I am happy that women are standing up for what they want and expressing their desires within their relationship (or are they, really?). but it saddens me that the partner that is looked at as the backbone of the relationship is willing to give up so easily.

Are women really expressing what they want from their partners? Or are they expecting them to be mind readers and guess what's making their partner so miserable all of a sudden? I think that communication is the foundation of any great relationship. And as long as you can communicate, ANYTHING can be worked out if it's addressed early enough.

That being said, I know we've all heard of the 80/20 rule. If you haven't, I'll give u the short version. NOBODY'S PERFECT. But if you have 80 of the 100% of what you want, it's likely that if you seek out that missing 20% in another partner, you won't have the 80% that you started with. I REALLY believe that if you have 80%, you should either find a way to gain the other 20% in your current partner, or learn to live without that other 20%. I always say that the grass always looks greener when you're seeing somebody else water it. But what happens when YOU'RE the one who has to water it? Is it still greener when somebody else is watering the lawn that used to be yours?

I know that some people will say that if that 20% is something like respect or sex, that it's worth considering leaving. I say that it is difficult to disrespect someone who respects themselves, and people only do to you what you allow them to do. How can you say that you have 80%, if there is no respect? I can't see how the other 80% could be there if there is no respect, unless your 80% is sex and everything else falls into that 20%. That would be another blog altogether.

On the other hand, the key to great sex lies in communication. If you can communicate your likes and dislikes to your partner and your partner is truly willing to please you, you can overcome your sexual issues. If you are a woman who has an issue with the size of your man's penis, let me just say that ALL men are built with the equipment to please ANY woman. I know that I am touching on a sensitive topic. I've been here before. Here's the thing….The G-Spot is only about 2 inches inside the vagina. If you ever meet a man with less than 2 inches of dick, tell him to call me, cuz I need to see that for myself. I think the smallest penis I've ever even heard about was 4 inches….that is….on a grown ass man… 4 inches can do a lot of damage….lol….trust me I know. And before yall get to judging me, NO, I am not unusually shallow, and I do have at least one kid, delivered vaginally….lol. For a man who is "short" in that respect, he needs to know what he's doing. If he doesn't, he needs to be taught. Either way, THERE IS A WAY!!!! If the problem is girth (width), then, my sister, the problem is with you. I know this also from experience….Fukkin wit these mandingos out here can fukk u up!!!!! Especially if that's what you're used to. But listen up, the vagina is a wondrous creation….lol…It can shrink and expand and it can even do some tricks. If you don't know any, hit me up, I'll hook u up….lol The best thing I can tell u if you meet your prince charming and he has a pencil dick, is to take a break from sex altogether (no dildos or any penetration whatsoever) for about 3 months….it's not that long….you can use a bullet or something for clitoral stimulation so u can get off during this very SHORT period of time. During this 3 months, do TONS of kegels…I mean TONS (it won't really take that many, but do TONS anyway). Everytime u think about it, squeeze those muscles. Get you some ben-wa balls or some other type of "sexercize" equipment, and work the hell out of those muscles. You'll be back to virgin tightness after 3 months guaranteed. Only guaranteed if there's no penetration, but even if there is a little, you'll be tight enough to cradle the smallest penis. Once you rectify that situation, from there, it's all about communication.

If the problem is that the guy is not happy with the sex, then there's definitely a problem with communication. I say this because women generally perform INSIDE the bedroom based on how they are being treated OUTSIDE the bedroom. If she's not performing well, she may be struggling with other areas of the relationship. Talk to her and find out what the problem is. See if you can relieve some stress that may be coming from somewhere else and affecting her ability to focus on you. If the problem is that her twat feels like a black hole, then refer her to the previous paragraph….lol

I know this is a long one, yall. But yall know I'm passionate about saving GOOD relationships. I hate to see people move on from one relationship and get into another, only to wish they had what they left in the last relationship. It's really sad….and I like to stay in my happy place….lol

I know some of yall gonna say I'm full of shit, so bring it on…..lmao

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