#120: To Say or Not to Say: Communication that Creates Closeness – Tony Fonderson - a podcast by Shana James: Coach, Speaker, Author

It’s not easy to bring up struggles, disappointments or frustrations in relationships. But have you noticed that when you don’t say anything, resentment can build while spark and trust fades? In today’s episode Tony Fonderson and I discuss how to communicate in a way that creates connection rather than breaks it.   







http://traffic.libsyn.com/manalive/communication-tony.mp3







Show notes







Are there topics of conversation that you find challenging to bring up?







Do you put off having these conversations, or not have them at all?







What do you find scariest to talk about? Money? Sex? Desires? How you are treated?







Many people don’t have the tools to make these conversations go well. But that doesn’t mean the tools don’t exist!







On today’s Man Alive podcast I was joined by author and coach Tony Fonderson. We talked about how to communicate in a way that creates connection rather than breaks it.  We give you tools to turn struggles, disappointments and frustrations into connection!







We discussed:







* How to create the safety to say what you want and ask for what you need* Where the courage to speak about challenging subjects comes from * How to take things your partner says less personally* Reorienting around beliefs and perspectives that create a lot of pain for couples* Powerful ways to notice when you’re squashing intimacy and start creating it 







If you haven’t listened to the other Man Alive episode with Tony, Honest Sex, you can check it out here.







Both of these are powerful conversations about how to share your truth in a way that creates more connection and passion! 







Links:







Connect with Tony Fonderson







Curious what you’d need to become a better leader and lover? Take the quiz







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Bio:







Tony Fonderson is a father, friend and valued guide whose natural talent is interacting with people in ways that they get the insights they need to solve deep personal problems. The son of an African diplomat, Tony grew up in multicultural environments and by the time he was 22, he’d lived in 6 different countries, had two engineering degrees, and spoke 4 languages fluently.







Tony was first introduced to the world of personal development after walking away unscathed from a near-fatal car crash with his two-year-old daughter. Although physically unharmed, he was deeply troubled by what was revealed to him during his brush with death, and this emerged to be a pivotal moment in his life.







His cosmic wake-up call led him to embark on a 20-year quest studying how life, love and relationships work, so that the next time he faced Death he could look back on a deep, rich, and meaningful life. His journey of self-discovery led him to understand that to create powerful, intimate partnerships, you must first understand who you are, and also understand what’s really going on behind the scenes.

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