Podcasts by Mystic Lasagna

The Mystic Lasagna Christmas Special - Down Home Country Gimp from 2021-12-20T05:00

Welcome to a very special, very not even a little safe for work, very erudite Christmas Special.

Special thanks to our Guests Adam H. Phillips of Listen

Episode 139 - SQUIRRRT!!! from 2021-12-13T05:00

Dance with us. Squirt with us. Let the festival begin!!

Squirrrt some catsup on this week's strip H...

Episode 138 - Holiday Brain Reformat from 2021-12-06T05:00

Uh oh, here comes spooky Jesus. Also, the Orange one helps Paul and Alex confront boredom. 

Ease into this week's strip Listen

Episode 137 - The Absence of Fish from 2021-11-22T16:41:55

Are you contributing to the systems you benefit from? Or are you just indiscriminately consuming?? Classic Garfield questions and perhaps the most beautiful panel Jim has ever drawn. 

Con...

The Final* Interlude from 2021-11-15T17:53:38

*I mean... you know for a hot minute. 

Y'all. Listen to the wind. 

Check out the strip that got away Listen

Episode 136 - Snail Anatomy from 2021-11-08T19:59:42

Expectations fuck you up. Also, real life cat stroller adventures and somehow more Robert Frost references. 

Release the hype for this week's strip Listen

Time Warp 3 - The Davian Field from 2021-11-01T19:42:49

One more blast from the past and then we dive into the Fieldian Holidays. This is the origin of many theories and terms we still use today in our studies of the Field. Enjoy your time travel!!! ...

Episode 135 - Dark Side of the 'Field from 2021-10-25T04:00

It's time again to get SPOOKY!!! Happy Halloween! Y'all know what that means, Binky the Clown nightmares, Chekov's Punkin head, and Pirate Ghosts! This year, well, Paul and Alex mixed things up ...

Episode 134 - Magic 8 Moon from 2021-10-18T19:20:56

We've got something a little new for you folks... Nah. We're playing the hits, doin the thing, makin the biscuits. This week Paul and Alex chat about a performers relationship with their audienc...

Time Warp 2: Jim Davis and the Shadow Government from 2021-10-11T04:00

Let's do the Time Warp again!!!! It's just a jump to the left, after all. 

Friends...this is the Alpha Recording. Paul and Alex had no intention of thinking about Garfield this much. It w...

Episode 133 - Double O Gamer Fuel from 2021-10-04T04:00

Yea. It's been a long couple of weeks, but we're always ready for the next adventure. This week, Paul and Alex talk about doing your job to fit into your environment and translating the needs an...

Episode 132 - Sisyphus says, "F*ck It." from 2021-09-27T04:00

It's time to get in the pool. Why the heck are you talking yourself out of it?? This week, Paul and Alex talk about finding reasons to rob yourself of joy. 

Jump in the deep end of this w...

Time Warp 1 - Lasagna Hadouken from 2021-09-20T04:00

Ok, friends. It's time to hop in the way way back machine and travel to... 2018!!! SOooOoOO LooOoNnG AaGo! Covfefe!!! Please enjoy some early 'Fieldian influence on Paul and Alex in this episode...

Episode 131 - Tree Burrito Ritual Protocol from 2021-09-13T03:53:31

When you begin the ritual, it's up to you to see it through. Big Magic this week, Friends.

Help this week's strip do it's job Listen

Episode 130 - Throwin Shade from 2021-09-06T04:00

Respect the Mechanism!!!! This week the Field, after an apparently much needed week off, catapults Paul and Alex into an absolutely epic exploration of life trapped in a window blind. Strap in, ...

Interlude - Destruction Math from 2021-08-30T04:00

Hi, friends. We need a sec. An actual sec to reboot and make sure the robots are all tuned up so as not to have another recording session like last week. So, here's Alex with a recently acquired...

Episode 129 - Inspiration Marathon from 2021-08-23T04:00

Sometimes you talk about needing to take breaks to find inspiration and the Universe starts turning off your recording equipment. Listen. Then turn off your podcast and REALLY listen. 

Be...

Episode 128 - Intentional Toast from 2021-08-16T20:00:08

Intent!! Do ya have it? Also, stop asking tired people to carry society forward. They're tired. 

Direct the energy of this week's strip Listen

Episode 127 - Stop Scratching from 2021-08-09T04:00

Addiction vs. Responsibility. That's pretty much it, that and how Garfield drives a car. And also killing bears and drinking games. This is a ride, y'all. Mostly, Paul and Alex are chatting abou...

Episode 126 - John Milton's Burnt Ass Eggs from 2021-08-02T04:00

Sometimes, when the Cosmic Diner tries to limit your options you gotta go off menu. Paul and Alex are both returned from their respective mountains and we have perhaps the most Epic Field Sighti...

Episode 125 - I am become Hope from 2021-07-19T04:00

Paul is full of home run power and the world is dropping apples on our heads. It's pretty straight forward this week, friends. It's time to chill out. 

Accept this week for what it is Listen

Episode 124 - The Shakti is Gonna Get Ya from 2021-07-12T04:00

Are you in the flow?? Or are you about to get pulled over by the Karma police? Paul and Alex talk traffic tickets of the real and metaphorical variety. 

Flash your lights at this week's s...

Episode 123 - Frog Martyrs of the Nexus from 2021-07-05T04:00

Here we are, at the center of everything, down the rabbit hole, and looking around. Ain't Life grand?? Join Paul and Alex beneath the tree of life to discuss martyrdom, colonialism, and the colo...

Episode 122 - Patience for Nothing from 2021-06-28T04:00

This week Paul and Alex are joined by Energy Healer, Standup Comedian, and Podcaster Katie Rubin! We talk to Katie about growing up as an only child in Florida with no one to spiritually guide h...

Episode 121 - The Dank Pook from 2021-06-21T04:00

Take a hit of this dank ass bear. This week we're talking about private time with the Universe and lickin meteors. 

Spark up this week's strip Listen

Episode 120 - Magical Tracksuit from 2021-06-14T16:06:06

We're talkin wizard robes today, friends. We're talking changing your reality and other realities and makin it friggin fashion. 

Try on this week's strip Listen

Episode 119 - The Chain from 2021-06-07T04:00

What's holding you back? What's it holding you from? Is it a lack of slang terms or the knowledge that all plants are rock stars? Join Paul and Alex for an ULTRA COOL episode. 

Get Jiggy ...

Episode 118 - Feel the Now!! from 2021-05-31T13:16:25

Do you really think you know how the Universe is supposed to function??? Perhaps it's time to get out from between the layers and glimpse life outside the pan.

Be present with this week's...

Episode 117 - Evolution Revolution from 2021-05-24T12:55:31

Oh, you lucky pocket monsters, who have but to look around to see evidence of your final form. Happy Monday, nerds!! Paul and Alex are trying to evolve and the tubby oracle just keeps talking sm...

Episode 116 - Lasagnamania! from 2021-05-17T04:00

Oh! My! God! He's going off the top rope!!!! This week Paul and Alex are going for the lasagna tap out. It's an extremely high octane episode of podsportstainment with discussions on the most pr...

Episode 115 - Too Much News from 2021-05-10T04:00

We're overwhelmed. Sometimes the Field comes at you relentlessly and the only thing to do is remember that the same thing is happening to everyone...sometimes...maybe?!?!?!? Things are rough, y'...

Episode 114 - Oh Headshoe, My Headshoe from 2021-05-03T13:24:18

Stand on your chair and scream at the Universe. This week it's lip glamours, backwards hat camouflage, shaking hands with strangers, and confronting new feelings. Paul and Alex are just summer c...

Episode 113 - Solar Powered Johnson from 2021-04-26T13:07:06

Oh sick, bro! You score that sweet spider internship? Aces. Now you just have to worry about surviving Ashton's butterfly wings, Vaccinated wieners, and Buttermilf wings. Bro, if you see W ask h...

Episode 112 - Joe Biden, God of Television from 2021-04-19T04:00

Paul and Alex are back together in the soundscape, and it's... well... kind of weird. After your boys settle into these unfamiliar surroundings and get the dog under control they discuss time tr...

Episode 111 - Ceremonial Pun Garb from 2021-04-12T03:52:15

Put on your dopest robes and let us prepare a feast. This week Paul and Alex are talkin sky powers, ceremonial garb, and throwback toy/car crossovers. 

Suit up with this week's strip Listen

Episode 110 - First Class Fart Cushion from 2021-04-05T04:00

Happy Eoster! Zombie saviors are out for revenge, Elvis is mad about his seating on an airplane, and Odie is king of the baggage compartment. This week Paul and Alex are talking about periods of...

Episode 109 - Ner Mal's Sword of Inevitability from 2021-03-29T04:00

Strap in. Hands and arms inside the podcast. This one might get messy. Paul and Alex have conjured up a potent strip this week, and they're talking Nermal, risk, and destiny. What would you risk...

Episode 108 - Spare Cheese from 2021-03-22T03:56:41

Whoops! Crappy Yadnom, friends. Paul and Alex start out this week's episode a little backwards. They talk Ninja Turtles cameos and gnocchi volleyball before communing with the 'Field for a conve...

Episode 107 - Quantum Dump from 2021-03-15T03:52:06

Ok. Let's get serious for a minute. How was y'all's time traveling? We need to use the poop hole please. This week Paul and Alex are extremely dialed in to the Field as they discuss recent tempo...

Episode 106 - Proper Skincare in the Dreamscape from 2021-03-08T05:00

Ok. Let's do some chakra shifting. This week Paul and Alex get right into it, then they stay in it. This might be the most obviously far out strip we've ever summoned, and it leads to discussion...

Episode 105 - Mr. Peanut, Nut God from 2021-03-01T03:27:50

Well...Paul and Alex are a lil punchy this week. After starting off as a drive time traffic report, for absolutely no reason, they look around the room and end up talking about food mascots and ...

Episode 104 - Papacino's Shame Scale from 2021-02-22T05:17:03

How do you measure up?!?! And are you concentrating on the measuring? This week Paul and Alex take a look at various physical and metaphorical scales, smell some women, confront plant fertilizer...

Episode 103 - Meditating in the Safety Pit from 2021-02-15T05:05:59

Where is all your excess energy? Paul and Alex spend the first ten minutes of this episode attacking their candles with blowtorches. Then the Field, in it's infinite wisdom, sends them a strip s...

Episode 102 - Zen Garden Bathroom Pranks from 2021-02-08T15:18:29

Welcome to Paul's cosmic Zen Garden. This week ya boys are keepin it mega chill and prankin on everything. We're prankin on portals, on oppressors, on Christopher Walken, on the ding dang Univer...

Episode 101 - Skatezard Teaches Self Respect from 2021-02-01T05:00

Paul and Alex have primed their canvas for the foreseeable forever and the first stroke of the brush...is Skatezard, the coolest freakin lizard around. He's covered in purple, seafoam, and pink,...

Episode 99/100 - Cosmic Barf Bags from 2021-01-25T05:00

Time. Hah!! Flat circle or not, we've rejoined Garfield in the air. Well, on the runway anyway. This week the 'Field brought Paul and Alex back to the beginning of our journey together so we cou...

Episode 98 - Address the Mountain from 2021-01-18T05:00

What the hell is that thing in the window? What in the actual HELL is that DEMON thing in the window. Well...whatever it is, it's there. And you've gotta deal with it. This week Paul and Alex ar...

Episode 97 - Lisa Frank the Movie from 2021-01-11T05:00

Old 97! It was, well, sort of a wild week. Wild enough for Paul and Alex to get politically adjacent with some talk about the Comicoup, but not wild enough to stop them from talking about high s...

Episode 96- Artificial Sparrow Power from 2021-01-04T05:39:38

What sort of power are you absorbing, and what are you doing with it? Have you maybe not tried some power cause you thinks it's weird? Maybe you'd like having Emu strength. Perhaps the call of t...

Episode 95 - Grandma's Christmas Porncrux from 2020-12-21T05:00

It is time once again, dear friends, to journey back to the Arbuckle farm for Christmas. This year we're joined by the inimitable Adam H. Phillips (Childz Play) as we discuss our own holiday tra...

Episode 94 - You Might Be A Commandment from 2020-12-14T05:00

There are moments, not always huge ones, where you are just going to do what you have to. Not moments where you need to step up, but moments when your very nature simply takes over. Moments that...

Episode 93 - The Path to the Smile from 2020-12-07T05:00

We're our own bosses!! That's right, this week Paul and Alex embrace the power of controlling themselves and their movement through the Universe! Along the way they learn the sounds of the days ...

Episode 92 - Dentures of Mutability from 2020-11-30T05:00

Tis the season of much conflict. Fa la la la la, la la la *SMACK*. That's right. This week's episode is all about weather or not it's worth getting into it. Do you need to fight with your family...

Episode 91 - Oops, We Did It Again from 2020-11-23T05:08:47

No. Nothing's wrong with your download, we absolutely did a six minute non sequitur to start the show. Then, as is the habit, that conversation bleeds into just a blistering storm of hot politic...

Episode 90 - Statistical Cat Orgasms from 2020-11-16T05:00

This week Paul and Alex solve the matrix with cat orgasms. That's right. That's what that sentence said. We get into Benford's Law and Twisted Minds before consulting the field. Using a strip fr...

Interlude - A Moment of Tranquility from 2020-11-09T14:22:35

It's been a big ol long long of a big. We're taking a break to recharge our mystic batteries, but we'll be back next week with the 'Field and all of our friends. Lasagnaste´. 

Fi...

Episode 89 - Headache Demons from 2020-11-02T05:00

Welp. We're this side of something. So, Paul and Alex take the chillest bike ride ever, contemplate capturing demons for personal use, then commune with the 'Field. This week we head to the Fiel...

Interlude - Missing Sock Network Launch!!!!!! from 2020-10-30T04:00

It's Alive!!!!! 

Welcome, Noodle Belts, to Missing Sock. It's a podcast Network for Explorers and Friends. Paul and Alex tell you all about our new Network and the Patreon page in this sh...

Episode 88 - Garfield's Halloween Adventure: Pirates of the Candybbean from 2020-10-26T04:00

Boo. It's Halloweentimes and we're taking our annual trip with the Orange one to an extremely haunted island. This year we talk about the halloween magic that makes Garfield huge, weather or not...

Episode 87 - Super Glue Noobs from 2020-10-19T04:00

Man. Our mess is all stuck together. We've been disrespecting our toys, friends. So, the 'Field makes sure we talk about it. On the way we enjoy the Egyptian Pantheon Family Circus, a prepubesce...

Episode 86 - Wet Paul the Gator Orphan from 2020-10-12T04:00

We all float down here. Cause down here is a lazy ass river, and we'll get to the point eventually. This week, while stuck in John Arbuckle's khaki hell, Paul and Alex take on a 12 year old bank...

Episode 85 - Dunekaroos from 2020-10-05T04:00

Let's get Chakradical. This week Paul and Alex are stayin Zen. John Arbuckle is not. After a few words on prophecy seeding, the Beast and the Seeker commune with the Field to talk about Maintena...

Episode 84 - Krueger Town from 2020-09-28T04:00

Are you dreaming? Have you ever been awake? Are you a robot? Are you a robot's dream? Are we all Garfield's dream? Let go and float through this episode, Friends. Paul and Alex are fully riding ...

Episode 83 - WAP (Why Arbuckle's Pretending) from 2020-09-21T04:00

Shameless SEO title aside (it's pretty f*&kin shameless), we've cooked up a heady casserole for you this week. Paul and Alex are joined by "Cthulhu in the Deep South" author and good friend Kirk...

Episode 82 - Spider Taint from 2020-09-14T04:00

Total. Situational. Awareness. 

This week we're settling into our surroundings. Those surroundings may be non euclidian. They may have been infiltrated by interplanar blankets. They may b...

Episode 81 - Shampoo Spiked Punch from 2020-09-07T04:00

PAY ATTENTION TO US!!!!! 

This week Paul and Alex discuss how much can go wrong when you aren't paying attention. Well, mostly we make fun of ourselves for making the high school equivale...

Episode 80 - Drunkin Bronuts from 2020-08-31T04:00

Just a couple a real New Yokas talkin about what they dunk deya donuts in. 

Y'all. We are drunk, our brains are mush, and we are hurtling through the universe at the speed of destiny. Thi...

Episode 79 - Werner Herzog's Bear Anus from 2020-08-24T04:00

What have you been doing with all your quarantime? If you said anything other than rebranding, you're wrong. It's time to rebrand...reality. In these trying times we here are Mystic Lasagna woul...

Episode 78 - Cleanse Me, Ocean Daddy from 2020-08-17T04:00

Let's get nice and clean. This week Paul and Alex discuss upside down and downright mythic showering methods, Carmen San Diego's Pyramid theiving ancestors, Garfield AI, and Joe Normal astronaut...

Episode 77 - The Great Purple Yahoo from 2020-08-10T03:50:23

Guided by the spirit of the Purple one Himself, we take to the bracing waters of some lake somewhere. It's a fishing trip with Captain Johnhab. Paul and Alex discuss Frankensteinian and Ahabish ...

Episode 76 - Pizza Mayor from 2020-08-03T04:00

Roach pranks, Lasagna heists, Robert Frost Mashups, and family toilet wine recipes, this one's a trip. Alex is once again full of cheese and Paul's brain is melting, but the 'Field manages to fi...

Episode 75 - Orangen Stories from 2020-07-27T04:00

This week we go way back...or the G man does anyway. Paul and Alex watched the 1983 special "Garfield on the Town", in which our hero strikes out on his own, has a dance fight with a punk rock a...

Episode 74 - The Titanic Wave from 2020-07-20T04:00

Sometimes, when you try to surf the big wave, you end up floundering in the ocean. This week, we look for joy in the chaos. Instead of thrashing around in the water, we attempt to float. In the ...

Episode 73 - The All Panel from 2020-07-13T04:00

GAAAARFIIIIIIEEEEELD JENKINS!!!! We are barreling into this week's episode with reckless lasagna swinging action! Witness the Field's Orangen story, and dive into the intricate philosophical nua...

Episode 72 - The Act of Crumpling from 2020-07-06T03:15:29

Just. Push. Through. Sometimes that mystic wisdom just doesn't wanna come out, or maybe your brain just doesn't wanna wrap itself around said wisdom. You gotta keep going. Don't crumple. Then ma...

Episode 71 - Chomp the Tube from 2020-06-29T04:10:46

Oh yes. The Orange Oracle has awoken the Garffalos within. Ralex 2 Cosmos and Sleepy P invite you to come with them on a ride that'll squeeze every drop of toothpaste from the tube. We talk boog...

Episode 70 - Swanson Man Comin from 2020-06-22T16:46:45

It's the terror of Suburban Florida...the Swanson Man. He's gonna stock your freezer with frozen meals or else!!! His lifelong feud with the postmaster general has kept him on the run. But he ca...

Episode 69 - Abolish Ice from 2020-06-15T04:00

This one's a journey, friends. Get ready to dive into a giant cosmic mutually beneficial pleasure act. After that, well, the 'Field confronts your hosts with a big, giant, frigid, block of ice. ...

Magical Amplification Interlude from 2020-06-08T04:00

Alright. We aren't the people who need to be listened to at the moment. Well, we will say that JK Rowling is an idiot. After that we just wanna point you to a few friends you should be aware of....

Episode 68 - Following Timmy Down the Well from 2020-06-01T04:48:53

Timmy's in the well again. Why's he down there? Well, maybe "Lassie" got sick of his shit. Maybe he deserves to be down there. Maybe he's protesting the rigors of being dubbed a savior against h...

Episode 67- Mystic Kitchen: Druidic Skate Tricks from 2020-05-25T04:00

Well, it's our first deep dive into mysticism, and Alex's brain has basically liquified. This week Alex takes Paul on a journey from the rolling hills of England to the tip of the Great Pyramid,...

Episode 66 - Garfin in the Pale Moonlight from 2020-05-18T04:00

Let it begin. We have emerged from the current kundun. The fresh breezes of change and growth have begun to blow. Join Paul, Alex, and the Orange Oracle as we stand on a fence and bellow our joy...

Episode 65 - ...Yikes. from 2020-05-11T04:00

Finally, the Field takes us deep into it's timeless and nebulous bosom. This week Paul and Alex drift within the periwinkle haze of a full Sunday strip. If you look to closely, well...yikes. Alo...

Episode 64 - The Couch from 2020-05-04T04:00

This one is Garftypal. Oh yea. We're going way back to the beginnings of our favorite tabby. All the while encountering Justin Timberlake Barenaked Ladies mashups, The Illuminati, and vengeful s...

Episode 63 - Patti Smith's Phleglum from 2020-04-27T04:00

Paul and Alex are reunited!! Well...they were, for a second. But that tiny physical reunion powers talk about the Staples Family Dynasty, Phishy Field readings, Patti Smith's hurricane hope, and...

Episode 62 - LSD Turtlenecks from 2020-04-20T04:00

Let's. Get. Far. Out. 

This week Paul and Alex discuss Newtonian Vaudeville Acts, Carl Sagan's LSD cheat codes, Cabin Fever Dresser Destructsion, and then turn to the Davian Field for a d...

Episode 61- The 32nd Flavor from 2020-04-13T04:00

The challenges of socially distant recording are mounting up. Thrill!! As Paul fails to put down a wine opener. Amaze! As Alex is forced to turn on the lights in his bedroom. Also, The Davian Fi...

Episode 60 - Chicken Soup From Your Soul from 2020-04-06T04:00

Jon has something for you. It's the juice squeezed from your tired quarantined soul. Do you eat it? Well, despite a yen for yacht rock and jet skis, that's the situation your intrepid hosts find...

Episode 59 - Squirt Gun Fight with Beelzebub from 2020-03-30T03:51:20

Your bliss won't show up unless you really truly believe it will. Same thing with demons. Believe in your bliss. Believe in demons. Believe in Garfield. Then, be ready when they show up. 

Episode 58 - Beware the Appendix Fairy from 2020-03-23T04:00

Hunker down and stick some lasagna in your ears. This week Paul and Alex are separated by physical space, but they're always one in the field. This week, after discussing Paul's collection of lo...

Episode 57 - Photoreceptive Shrimp from 2020-03-16T04:00

Welcome to the Orange Collar Comedy Tour!! This week Paul and Alex try out some new cutting edge joke formulas, invent breadstick bazookas, and get jealous of shrimp that can see better than Geo...

Episode 56 - Live Between the Layers: Cocaine Stuffed Pet Coffins from 2020-03-09T04:00

From Halyards in scenic Gowanus, it's the second edition of Live Between the Layers!!!

This week we're joined by Becca Stokes to discuss combining in home cat packs, pet funerals both ter...

Episode 55 - Chilly Joe and the Stripper Pole from 2020-03-02T05:15:46

Join Paul and Alex on their quest for corporate sponsorship and creation of new Trader Joe's mascots. Also, they get their ears tied in a knot. 

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Episode 54 - Freezer Lobsters from 2020-02-24T05:00

Look who's back! Amanda VanNostrand joins us again to chat about humane crustaceacide and anthropomorphized refrigerator drama. Plus we consult the field and get an early shot of Nermal going al...

Episode 53 - Self Fulfilling Bunny Ears from 2020-02-17T15:44:45

The snake has eaten it's tail!! John and Garfield are talking about horoscopes and the mystic consequences of following your bliss. We are in direct contact with the Davian Field. It is time to ...

Episode 52 - Getting to Know Charizard from 2020-02-10T05:00

The Orange Oracle is just chilling so hard these days. Garfield knows that no matter what he does, he can't experience everything. Life isn't a game of catching them all. So, open up those pokeb...

Episode 51 - Mood Shaming from 2020-02-03T05:00

Give us a great big smile! We're back after the absolute madness of episode 50, and settling down into a nice conversation with the field about mood shaming, emotional vampirism, and trapping sm...

Episode 49 - Chill Between the Chonks from 2020-01-27T05:00

Behold the rise of Number Boy!! Oh, but the leveling up in this episode! After evolving to their next forms, Paul and Alex chat with the Field about residing at the center of the Universe throug...

Episode 48 - Close Enough from 2020-01-20T05:00

The G man is everywhere. This week Paul and Alex take a moment to relax after the live show and discuss Garfield smashing his way into the memosphere and what it's like fighting the fight for th...

Episode 47 - LIVE Between the Layers! - Dish Pit Vampire from 2020-01-13T05:00

LIVE from the People's Improv Theatre in Manhattan! We are so happy to present our first live show, in which we solve all of the problems in the Star Wars fandom with a randomly generated Garfie...

Episode 46 - Subversive Pickle Juice from 2020-01-06T05:00

New Year. Same old Garfield. Paul and Alex walk through flipping the script and using metaphoric pickle juice to keep your friends from getting complacent here in this new decade. Also, the Were...

Episode 45 - A Very Davian Christmas from 2019-12-23T05:00

Let's begin an annual tradition, shall we? Join Paul and Alex in watching Garfield's 1987 Christmas special. We'll join John, Odie, and Garfield on a trip to the farm. There will be no stakes, n...

Episode 44 - Couch Ghost Love Fart Snack from 2019-12-16T05:00

Have an undead friend in your futon? No worries, just feed them with your buttsplosions. They Love it! This week Paul and Alex talk about getting a new coffee table, eliminating furniture slurs,...

A Holiday Interlude from 2019-12-09T14:47:40

The Holidays are hectic! Dr. Doctor Professor Paul is out this week. So, your always local seeker of Truths explores some holiday wisdom with you. Alex found a list of Christmas quotes on the ol...

Episode 43 - Fois Gras Flex from 2019-12-02T05:00

Whole lotta showing off in this one! Paul and Alex know about, well, alot. Let the flexing commence! We've also got a new 'Field Sighting, and the Davian Field takes us on a little adventure loo...

Episode 42 - Mariah Carey's Dragon Water from 2019-11-25T05:00

Monday is Monday is Monday is Monday is Monday. Sometimes a Monday is hiding a special treat inside. So, just remember that the good times are coming around again. Also, Alex ate Mariah Carey's ...

Episode 41 - Universe Corn from 2019-11-18T05:00

This week the Universe helps Paul and Alex take a closer look at racist songs from the great American songbook. Then, the Davian Field serves up an enigma phone, portal warnings, and dead eyed r...

Episode 40 - Free Hoodies and Runner Goo from 2019-11-11T05:00

Put the shovel down!! There isn't a rule that says you have to keep digging. Friends, get ready for some nutty energy here. Paul is juggling too many commitments from folks and Alex has hit that...

Episode 39 - A Universe Slap to the Privates from 2019-11-04T20:47:26

What will you do with your gift? Our good buddy Sarah is nermaling all up in our studio today and helping us discuss the nature of gift giving as well as what to do when the Universe decides to ...

Episode 38- Garf "Halloween" Field from 2019-10-28T15:11:47

So SpOoooOOooOKy!! It's time for another Mystic Lasagna and Friends! For the spookiness, we're watching the original Garfield TV special from 1985. Watch along with us, and BEWARE! ...it's not t...

Episode 38 - Sandbox Noir from 2019-10-21T04:00

Ah, the existential crisis of the changing seasons. This week Paul and Alex discuss cold toilet seats, Sartre sequels, and mermaid triggered boners. Join us. 

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Episode 37 - Murder to Live from 2019-10-14T04:00

This week we're murdering things and absorbing their power. Also, we're looking for balance. Also, Alex has consumed a Garfieldian amount of coffee and Paul is about to spring his long con. This...

Episode 36 - The Whole Tin from 2019-10-07T04:00

Garfield isn't one to take life a lil sip at a time. This week Paul and Alex discuss communication in relationships, the benefits of moderation, and what it would sound like if Hulk Hogan and Va...

Episode 35 - Garbage Food from 2019-09-23T13:12:37

One man's trash is another man's snack time, apparently. Paul and Alex are confused by the Masked Singer, contemplate becoming garbagemen to improve our podcasting careers, bitch about timeout s...

Episode 34 - Lions, and Pennants, and Portals. Oh My! from 2019-09-17T15:33:30

Just a nice dark combative episode about tribalism and self righteousness. Yay. This week we're rooting for our own teams no matter who that pits us against. Grab a big foam finger and root for ...

Episode 33 - The Thirteen of Hangovers from 2019-09-09T04:00

Sometimes you just gotta play with your toys. This week, through a haze of foggy memories and pounding heads, Paul and Alex get some advice from the field on appreciating the things you've creat...

Episode 32 - The Nine of Phones from 2019-09-02T04:26:52

What happens after the end of a good learning montage? Well, you gotta do something with that knowledge, don't you? This week Paul and Alex discuss what to do with knowledge and skills once you'...

Episode 31 - The Eight of Sausages from 2019-08-26T04:00

Mastery, Action, Accomplishment. These are the attributes of the eight of sausages. It's no wonder we spend a massive chunk of the episode talking about Dwayne Johnson and his many action accomp...

Episode 30- Split, Splat, Splut 11/02/11 from 2019-08-19T04:00

Look out, here come the cathphrases! Also, big shout outs to all of our various fanbases! Join Paul and Alex this week as they cast a wide net. This reading is for...you. Yea, you. We all have a...

'Field Sightings 2 - Lifesagna from 2019-08-12T04:00

No psychic readings today. There was too much Gfunk news, Paul had an amazing 'field sighting, and Alex won't stop eating edibles before recording. The Davian Field manages to pump some helpful ...

Episode 29 - All our Poop is Stardust 7/29/13 (Feat. Sarah Morgan Ashey) from 2019-08-05T04:00

Oh Hey! Sarah done Nermaled her way onto the show again. We're always happy to have her and the hamster that operates her brain back on the show. This week it's Alex who needs to commune with th...

Episode 28 - Ray Donovan's Exotic Fish Drones 3/20/87 from 2019-07-29T04:00

It finally happened. We generated a strip we were familiar about. It makes sense, since this entire episode is a sh*t show of fish puns and references to a television program neither host has ev...

Episode 27 - The Moon is There 6/4/98 (Feat. Hannah Harkness) from 2019-07-22T04:00

Ladies and Gentlemen, in this corner, the Junkyard Cat! Paul and Alex are joined this week by comedian and aspiring professional wrestler Hannah Harkness. We talk Garfield themed tag team partne...

Episode 26 - A Dark and Stormy Lasagna 3/17/85 from 2019-07-15T04:00

Lightning Strikes! And the weird lasagna starts to bubble in the oven. This week Paul and Alex are a little all over the place. Sarah calls in with some concerns for the Davian Field, Jim Davis ...

Episode 25 - Dime Time garfs the Las 8/3/06 from 2019-07-08T13:41:53

Garfield! Where are you! Speak to us! This week Paul and Alex are feeling a little disconnected from the Davian Field. Some conversation about competitive lasagna consumption leads them to a dat...

Episode 24 - Hang in There 1/19/16 (Feat. Toby Nelson) from 2019-07-01T12:40:33

This week your hosts are joined by Toby Nelson, who needs a job. The field responds with an actual "hang in there" meme, and we talk about the reproductive fluid of cartoon dogs...alot. Probably...

Episode 23 - Mystic Lasagna and Friends from 2019-06-24T14:06:02

Here's a fun different weird episode! Paul and Alex record commentary over "Garfield Goes Hollywood". Join your hosts and the Orange Oracle as he takes his talents to the national stage. Watch a...

Episode 22 - Deadly Laugh Sweats 3/07/02 from 2019-06-17T04:00

Hang on to your panties. It's the horniest episode of Mystic Lasagna to date. There's...just so much slurping. Join Paul and Alex in wishing the Orange Oracle a happy 41st birthday, then as they...

An Interlude 11/6/83 from 2019-06-10T04:00

Just a short interface with the field this week, as Dr. Doctor Professor Father Paul is off being a big time producer. So, Alex shouts out a couple field sightings and then reads a big ol fat se...

Episode 21 - The Wizard is the Mice Dudes 5/3/18 (Feat. Alexander Stine) from 2019-06-03T04:00

This week Alexander Stine joins ya boys in Blanketphort studios to discuss basement treasure, Wizards, 1950's cool, and leyline maps. Then the Davian Field gives Mr. Stine some advice on transit...

Episode 20 - Jon's Technicolor Dream Table 2/11/80 (Feat. Adam Phillips) from 2019-05-27T04:00

This week number one fan and Level 3000 Davian Diver Adam Phillips joins us in Blanketphort Studios to discuss supermarket break room relaxation,  and we turn to the Davian Field for advice on b...

Episode 19 - Omnipresent Hamster 3/31/92 (Feat. Sarah Morgan Ashey) from 2019-05-20T22:04:52

This week Paul and Alex are joined by Sarah Morgan Ashey, who, apparently, is controlled by an immortal hamster that lives in her head? Yea. Yea, that sounds right. Join all three as they ask th...

Episode 18: Mostly Muffins, Cursed Muffins 5/31/03 from 2019-05-13T04:00

Well friends. We've had a bunch of guests on lately. We'll have more next week, but for just a second Paul and Alex are taking a step back to examine their process and the effects that meticulou...

Episode 17 - Teeter My Totter 5/3/86 (feat. Dillon Geyselaers) from 2019-05-06T04:00

This week we are joined by Dillon Geyselaers! We discuss Jesus Wizardry, Guy Slurs, TV rituals, bonus Garth Brooks verses, and then the Davian Field helps Dillon make some decisions about his ca...

Episode 16 - Spider Brains 6/30/86 (Feat. Becca Stokes) from 2019-04-29T04:00

This week Paul and Alex are joined by the inimitable Becca Stokes, who along with being an accomplished writer and comedian, spent ten dollars a month in 90's money on a Garfield fan club member...

Episode 15 - Dog Cliff 7/8/17 (Feat. Emily Walsh) from 2019-04-22T04:00

This week Paul and Alex are joined by Brooklyn based comic Emily Walsh. We discuss swimming in the Hudson, the Statue of Liberty's star sign, and truck grill based pop culture tributes before in...

Lost Episode - Chewing through the Darkness from 2019-04-15T04:00

Paul and Alex are busy lining up guests and getting geared up for future lasagna based Mystical pursuits. So, this week we offer up our "Lost Episode". Recorded and sealed away back before we'd ...

Episode 14 - Hi, Arlene. (feat. Amanda VanNostrand) 10/10/83 from 2019-04-08T04:00

This week comedian and writer Amanda VanNostrand joins us in the studio to discuss a big giant Davian cat call, Garfield flavored lightning bolts, and making the Universe meet you on your terms....

Episode 13- The Catheian Field 2/15/10 from 2019-04-01T04:01:31

Welcome to Mystic ACKnowledgements. Every week your hosts Paul and Alex answer questions from listeners and guests using the purest source of knowledge and wisdom on the planet: randomly generat...

'Field Sightings - Je Deteste le Lundi from 2019-03-31T15:50:22

Ok. We had to say something. After we received tweets, emails, multiple tags, and direct texts Paul and Alex felt compelled to address the Garfield phones washing up on French beaches for thirty...

Episode 12 - Sassy Cat's Dignity Curls 1/29/02 from 2019-03-25T04:00

This week Paul and Alex discuss Garfield's body language and what might drive him to commit seppuku before digging into a question from our buddy Robert (from the Heartbeats podcast check it out...

Episode 11 - Old Man Griewes 2/18/2007 from 2019-03-18T04:00

Sometimes we take a historical look at the Davian Field. Context, ya know? So, this week we look back at what the DF was doing while Britney was shaving her head and going kuku bananas back in 0...

Episode 10 - Paddle me a board, Paddle Man 8/9/01 from 2019-03-11T04:00

This week is all about destinationless recreation. Sometimes it's nice just to do, ya know? Fellow podcaster Holly gets some advice from the field to that effect this week after turning to the b...

Episode 9 - Prison Nachos 4/10/88 from 2019-03-04T05:00

 Alex is messing around with Krystals. Paul practices his foley work, and Garfield helps, ironically, with advice on relationship weight gain. 

Listen

Episode 8 - Death Shreds for us All 6/16/88 from 2019-02-25T05:00

The Davian field gets put to the test this week when Alex's fiance asks about pets playing favorites. Paul and Alex consult the Orange Oracle and have some startling revelations about the bevera...

Episode 7 - Brad Pitt's Creative Passion 10/3/16 from 2019-02-18T05:00

Thanks to Mike Mercadal from the Zeroes on Heroes podcast for sending us a question this week! Hit up http://zeroesonheroes.com/  to check out his excel...

Episode 6 - The Rainstick Maneuvre 9/27/78 from 2019-02-11T05:00

This week we turn to the Davian field for advice on deescalating a situation. Garfield's subtle wisdom leads Paul and Alex to discuss the merits of pocket airhorns, failproof shushing methods, a...

Episode 5 - Eat the Fork 4/14/83 from 2019-02-03T05:00

Eat the fork. Eat the moth. Eat the fart. This week Paul and Alex talk about committing to the bit when they answer an email from "Adam P". We're back on that airplane flight from a few weeks ag...

Episode 4 - Furry Orange Ghostrider 2/16/81 from 2019-01-28T05:00

This week the Davian field takes an active roll in the recording process and gives us a question out of the blue (Well, from Paul's wife who has a knack for calling when she knows we're recordin...

Episode 3 - Permanent Frat Kicks 11/30/79 from 2019-01-21T05:22:14

Welp. No one is sending questions in yet. So, we went ahead and stole one from Dear Abby's website. ...Sorry. Anyway, we talk tattoos, potential as demon fuel, overcommitment to a behavior as a ...

Episode 2 - Chesley take the wheel - 4/11/83 from 2019-01-14T05:00

It's time to take to the skies. Garfield is nervous about flying, and prompts Paul and Alex to discuss the willingness to believe in magic, safety rituals, and goose related catastrophic insuran...

Episode 1 - A Fistfight with Chaos 1/17/82 from 2019-01-04T18:16:49

Welcome to Mystic Lasagna. Paul and Alex talk about what this silly joint is gonna be, talk about the ways Garfield has already affected all of our lives and then take a long look at a strip fro...