Episode 22 - James Bond - Casino Royale - “Defib-based Cocktease” - a podcast by Spectre Etc

Welcome to SPECTRE etc. This is the James Bond podcast where we discuss the ins and the outs of each film. In this episode, we gush over our favourite scenes and pretend to be poker professionals. Join us as we explore the origins of our favourite spy in “Casino Royale”.

* The pre-titles sequence has Bond in a meeting that seems to mainly deal with a recent bathroom struggle. Bond’s 00-status is confirmed by some of the many spinning polygons in the titles. Mr White introduces Le Chiffre to some Ugandan warlords who need banking advice. Bond is in Madagascar, partnered by a bumbling fool, and parkours up a crane - sadly never finding out if the cobra beat the mongoose.
* M throws a bit of a tantrum because Bond breaks into her apartment. She punishes him with a Ford Mondeo, so Bond finds a parking lot and throws his own tantrum. Then 007 declines the missionary position in favour of a mission. He tracks ellipsis until it trails off, then jets off to the runway in plane site - leading to a chase that is Virgin on the ridiculous.
* James is microchipped by M and skewered by Vesper. He and Vesper need help to take down Le Chiffre in Montenegro, so they are joined by Mathis - a renowned poker commentator. The plan is to wear poker-playing costumes and order complicated cocktails.
* Between hands, Bond teaches those Ugandan warlords not to stair. James rejoins the poker table and cleans up, and then visits Vesper in the shower - where he sucks at cleaning up. The following day, Le Chiffre cleans out Bond’s bank balance by bluffing about bluffing.
* Felix happily makes his own wallet Leiter, so James can stay in the game. After a hand nearly kills him, Bond is back in a flush. Vesper joins James for a post-poker dinner, where Bond names a cocktail after her. When Vesper vanishes, Bond takes off but rolls his car. He is dragged off for debriefing - where Le Chiffre has a ball. Thankfully, Mr White arrives and kills Le Chiffre before Bond is forced to have a ball.
* Bond is sent to an Italian lakeside villa to recover from his scrotal trauma. James blames Mathis for this betrayal, so has him taken off for enhanced interrogation. This leaves Bond alone with Vesper - who attacks his groin more ferociously than Le Chiffre did.
* This time Bond chooses the girl over the mission, so he resigns and the two lovebirds head to Venice - where Vesper betrays Bond and steals the money. James is able to beat the bad guys and sink a building, but is unable to prevent Vesper from drowning. Mr White escapes with the cash - until he meets “Bond, James Bond”.

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