J is for Jilling (and Jacking) Off - a podcast by Dr. Lori Beth Bisbey - A to Z of Sex

Hi everyone!  Welcome to the A to Z of Sex.  I’m Dr Lori Beth and I am your host.  We are working our way through the erotic alphabet one letter at a time.  Today’s letter is J and Jilling (and Jacking) Off. 
 Jacking off and jilling off are both terms used for masturbation.  I was over 40 before I heard the term ‘jilling off’ and found it amusing that there was a separate word for masturbation for women and for men.   Masturbation is not only normal, but almost everyone masturbates.  Most people masturbate whether they are single or in relationships.  Masturbation has health benefits that include stress reduction, a reduction in prostate cancer for men, relief from menstrual cramps for women to name a few. Masturbation also increases muscle tone in the pelvic and anal areas.
 Historically, masturbation has been depicted in art since prehistoric times.  Masturbation was previously seen as immoral.  Most of the emphasis on immorality came about from the biblical prohibition against spilling one’s seed on the ground.  This was in contrast to being fruitful and multiplying.    In the late 20th and 21st centuries, masturbation has been destigmatised.  Masturbation is no longer seen as damaging or a problem unless it gets in the way of sex with a partner or interferes with work and other activities.  If you are masturbating for hours every day and not doing anything else, it is a problem.  Otherwise, it is healthy and should be a lot of fun.
 Jacking off is not only fun but it can help a guy find out what turns him on most.  It can also help him learn to control his orgasms so he can last longer during sex with a partner.  Jilling off can help a woman figure out what turns her on the most and also help her figure out how to reach orgasm – what kind of stimulation works best for her – direct clitoral stimulation, indirect stimulation, penetration, no penetration. 
 Sometimes men worry that they can damage their penises by jacking off too much.  A penis doesn’t ‘break’ unless very violently twisted when erect and it is the tubes that fill with blood during erection that rupture.  Damage when partner is on top is the most common but this is still very rare.  There are no reported cases I could find of breaking a penis through jacking off.  The most damage done during jacking off is usually some swelling and soreness from being too rough on the penis, using no lubrication and/or jacking off to often or too long.
 Women worry about damaging themselves jilling off.  The most common injury during jilling off is soreness of the clitoris caused by not enough lubrication, roughness or use of a toy without enough lubrication.
 There are over 500 names/terms for masturbation.  The term masturbation isn’t very exciting.  Perhaps that’s why so many euphemisms have been created.    This video from refinery 29 highlights a bunch of creative terms women use, including jilling off. Masturbation is such a clinical term.   A couple of the other terms that stood out: buttering my muffin, petting the kitty. Rubbing it out is the gender neutral term that is preferred.  Still most of the 500 names are male centric.
 50 – 60% of women use sex toys for masturbation.  I remember when I first became aware of sex toys the only vibrator that was regularly available was a hard plastic one.  It was ugly and really rough.  It put me off sex toys for many years.  Now there are an amazingly wide number sex toys that are great for masturbation.  Vibrators are made in body friendly silicone.  There are ones (often called rabbits) that stimulate the clitoris and penetrate the vagina.  There are rabbit vibrators that thrust and ones that heat up to body temperature.  There is the Hitachi magic wand that is still one of the most popular vibrators available.  It is very powerful.   There are clitoral vibrators and the new clitoral stimulators (like the poorly named womaniser) which use sonic waves or suction or air currents to bring a

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