Podcasts by The Alligator - I Might Be A Croc, I Dont Know - Show
Comedy podcast. MP3 format. Occasionally -- if we feel like it. This podcast features our friend, Alligator, in skits from an imaginary swamp. Alligator spouts thought-provoking nonsense, and eats almost anything he can get his jaws around. He's no dummy, though: In the midst of his babble you'll likely hear references to science, math, technology, and arcane vocabulary, as well as thinly veiled commentary on contemporary topics. Alligator is always coming up with new theories and inventions, which may amuse and will definitely confound you. Sometimes surreal, often thoughtful, and full of improvisation. Stream of consciousness. Look for our Podcast in the iTunes Store.
Further podcasts by Robert and Timothy Hamilton
Podcast on the topic Comedy
All episodes
EP 119: Jelly Jolly Jelly Frog from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This is a highly accurate summary of this episode's content?
ListenEP 118: A Piece of The Nobel Peace Prize from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This episode ends up exactly where it belongs: in a dumpster.
ListenEP 117: One, Two, Three, Infinity from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
We left the description of this episode at the end of infinity. Or near it.
ListenEP 116: Swamp Calendar from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
I'm all mixed up about this episode. Listen to it and you can join me. . .
ListenEP 115: Hot Cheese Head from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This episode is so hot that it will melt your frozen little heart -- or maybe so.
ListenEP 114: Bubba and the Big Stank from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
We apologize for this episode; your refund is in the mail.
ListenEP 113: Sticky Wicket from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This episode is a momentous intellectual event. Too bad you missed it, as well as the point.
ListenEP 112: Antialiased Alligator from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
You don't even know what antialiasing is, do you!? But then neither does your alter-ego.
ListenEP 111: Tacky Material from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you'd like to wade through something that has oozed out of the swamp, then here's your big chance.
ListenEP 110: The Six-Legged Monkey from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you think this blurb describes this episode, then to correct that misunderstanding, just listen to the show.
ListenEP 109: Reality Perfect from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This episode is as perfect as reality itself; it doesn't get more real than this!
ListenEP 108: Digitized Frogs from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Will the biggest ZERO, Alligator, become the first ONE to digitize frogs?
ListenEP 107: Toe Juice from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
The only thing more intoxicating than this episode is fermented toe juice. So soak it up!
ListenEP 106: Changing The Days from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you print this non-synopsis, and look at it from a satellite, then it will appear to be the size of the period at the end of this sentence
ListenEP 105: The Storm, Part 2: Swamp Overflow from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If a swamp has ever overflown you, then you know to dodge the offal rain.
ListenEP 104: The Storm, Part 1: Evil Frog Pickles from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you think evil frog pickles would leave a bad taste in your mouth, wait 'til you finish listening to this episode.
ListenEP 103: Swamp Zombies from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
I could tell you what this episode is about, but then I'd have to turn you into one of the undead . . .
ListenEP 102: Alligator's World Invasion from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Even if he fails for the umpteenth time, Alligator will keep trying to swamp the whole world.
ListenEP 101: Crumpet Summit from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If we could figure out what this episode is actually about then we'd write a summary right here.
ListenEP 100: Hole to China -- Can You Dig It from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Host Bob periodically takes over Alligator's voice, as the show morphs from China to paper towels and peanut butter.
ListenEP 99: Alligator and the Pickle from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you can fire up just one brain cell, then during this episode you'll be able to match Alligator's mental output.
ListenEP 98: Berry Theory from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
The summary contained in this word-bubble is now going to burst.
ListenEP 97: Despite The Fact from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Right after you listen to this episode, just ponder the fact that all your successes and all your failures -- in a "butterfly effect" fashion -- have led to this high point in your life.
ListenEP 96: Parenthetical Theses from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
(One thesis is that the following sentence is an accurate synopsis of this episode: Another thesis is that this summary is false. A third possible thesis is:--)
ListenEP 95: Pie Are Squared from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This non-synopsis began with the first T, and is about to end with the following period.
ListenEP 94: Recluse Catnip from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Fundamentally, this episode is just a string of 1's and 0's. And you thought this show was just going to be a big zero!
ListenEP 93: Only One Brain Cell from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
You only need one brain cell to grok this episode; Alligator's swamp is deep, but his shows are shallow. . .
ListenEP 92: EarWorm from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Here's an earworm for you: "Alligator invades your dreams; please enjoy your bloody screams."
ListenEP 91: The Third Part of Forever from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
The title of this episode is completely misleading.
ListenEP 90: Risky Asterisk from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
The following is a big lie: Listening to this episode will lower the risk of the asterisk.
ListenEP 89: Village Pillager from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator has promised not to pillage your village, if you'll promise to listen to this episode.
ListenEP 88: The Inner Bean from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This episode is one, long, inner-bean-gas expulsion tangent!!
ListenEP 87: Chocolate Frogs from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you think you can make sense of this episode, then you've probably eaten too many chocolate frogs.
ListenEP 86: The Forbidden Word from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
We can't tell you what this show is about because we'd have to use the "Forbidden Word."
ListenEP 85: LunaTwitch and Yogi Yogurt from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
We guarantee that if you listen to this episode, you'll get the full-moon treatment.
ListenEP 84:The SwamperNet from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Are swamp spiders invading the SwamperNet? Does miming work in a podcast? What are dictionaries doing in the swamp? You'll have to load up and log on to find out!
ListenEP 83: Eating Clouds from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you want a summary, first listen to this episode, and then write one yourself.
ListenEP 82: Fortean Frogs from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Listen up! Something strange is going on down in Alligator's swamp.
ListenEP 81: The Undying Snoring Machine from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
After you listen to this episode, please tell us what you think of the following synopsis: " . . ."
ListenEP 80: Mock 2 -- A Better New World Odor from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
It's plain, this show rains mainly on your brain.
ListenEP 79: The False Left-Right Paradigm from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you're still reading this, you've already gone over the edge. So, you might as well go ahead and listen to this episode, too.
ListenEP 78: Frog Tags from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
After you listen to episode 78, you should read this deceptive description, starting at the beginning of the very sentence that you just finished reading.
ListenEP 77: MP3 Pliers from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you listen to this episode, it might get stuck in your head!
ListenEP 76: Alligator's New Diet from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Stick a pin in this episode: It really needs to be deflated!
ListenEP 75: Midget Fidget Seeds from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
After you listen to this episode, you'll realize that its content has nothing to do with this synopsis.
ListenEP 74: Not Gonna Do This Show from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator claims he is not going to do this show. So I'm not going to write this blurb!
ListenEP 73: The Quickest Draw from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If we could tell you what this episode is really about, you wouldn't believe it. In order to grok this croc, you really need to listen for yourself.
ListenEP 72: Burble Slosh from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
After you listen to this episode, close your eyes and move your head from side to side. Notice that you can now hear a "burble slosh."
ListenEP 71: It's a Gas from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator wants to elevate humanity. So, what's the catch?
ListenEP 70: Crocster's Dictionary from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator wants to re-write the dictionary. I think this new idea of his really stinks; what do you thinks?
ListenEP 69: Alligator's New Religion from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator has got to be right -- wouldn't you agree? For your own sake, I sure hope so!
ListenEP 68: Pop-Up Toaster Brain from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If previous episodes have left you confused, this one should clarify everything. If you have never listened before, it might press your reset button.
ListenEP 67: Never Say Chocolate from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator hates chocolate, so that's not really what this episode is about; however, he does unveil a new candy that he has just invented. We hope you'll eat some.
ListenEP 66: D.C. Swamped from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
What do you think about Alligator's new plan to deal with the political situation? If he follows through, he might find himself swamped for quite some time. . .
ListenEP 65: The UFO Show from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Are aliens stealing Alligator's frogs for the Intergalactic Frog Museum? Will Alligator be able to build his own flying saucer in time? What does Fiji have to do with all this? The only way to find...
ListenEP 64: Instant Water from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Even if you don't add water to this episode as you listen, it's still all wet!
ListenEP 63: Flush This Episode from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
After listening to this episode, you'll need to follow the advice of its title.
ListenEP 62: An Institutional Commitment from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you dare to listen, then you'll have to join the Zombies who were kicked off this episode.
ListenEP 61: Peel a Tangent from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
What unavoidably comes to mind when I try to describe this episode accurately is absolutely nothing. Wouldn't you agree?
ListenEP 60: Exponential IQ Regression from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
The title of this episode is a tribute to what is happening to the regular listeners of this show.
ListenEP 59: Stamp Cramps from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If we told you what this episode is really about, then we'd have to kill you. So, you'll just have to figure it out yourself by listening; however, that might be lethal, too.
ListenEP 58: The Doppelganger from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you don't want your Doppelganger to gang up on you, then listen to this episode to learn how Alligator deals with the problem.
ListenEP 57: Artificial Mediocrity from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This episode is a perfect example of its title.
ListenEP 56: A New Angle from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator has a whole new angle, and it's aimed right at YOU -- if you care to listen.
ListenEP 55: Cataclysmic Fidget from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
The next time you fidget, keep in mind the events that ensue in this episode. Of course you'll have to listen to it first.
ListenEP 54: Russell's Paradox from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This episode's description has nothing to do with its content; but maybe the title does.
ListenEP 53: Snow Snakes from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator begins talking about snow snakes, but then gets all heated up about tangled tangential issues.
ListenEP 52: The Swamp Gas University from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you listen to this episode you won't learn anything useful. Instead, you should enroll in the main course offered by "The Swamp Gas University."
ListenEP 51: Giant Quark Farm from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator reveals a flaw in his "Theory of Almost Absoulutely Eveything," and also talks about his Cosmic Quark Spinner. It's all quite charming.
ListenEP 50: Plant Liars from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
What do plant liars and The Holey Cow Church have to do with Alligator? You'll have to listen to this episode to find out.
ListenEP 49: Confucius Copyrighted Confusion from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you can repeat the title of this episode backwards ten times without a mistake, then you don't need to listen to this show. Or maybe you do?
ListenEP 48: Destroy All Copies of This from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
This episode is pending deletion. Please listen to something else. This show will self destruct in 3...2...KABOOM!
ListenEP 47: The Quantum Mechanic from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you simultaneously listen and don't listen to this episode, then you will and you won't learn what a quantum mechanic is and isn't.
ListenEP 46: The New World Odor from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator claims this episode emits a big stink. What do you think?
ListenEP 45: String Cheese Theory from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator is shattered when he discovers that he has forgotten who he is.
ListenEP 44: Colorized Swamp from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator decides to give the swamp a fresh coat of paint. Mauve anyone?
ListenEP 43: The Croc Mess Nonster from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Someone is leaving a mess in Alligator's swamp; does it have anything to do with spoiled sauerkraut?
ListenEP 42: The Big Fat Butt-Head Historical Society from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Who has been inducted into Alligator's new, elite society? You'll have to listen to find out.
ListenEP 41: Toxic Waste Dump from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator realizes he's a toxic waste dump, and comes up with a unique solution.
ListenEP 40: The Year After Tomorrow from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator gets sneer reviews after his country fair is temporarily postponed. No fair!
ListenEP 39: The Truth Discovered from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator happens upon the truth, but you'll never believe what it is or where he finds it.
ListenEP 38: The Infinite Ecclectic from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator discusses the fate of someone who trips on the boundary between the finite and the infinite.
ListenEP 37: Prisoner Of My Own Mind - Part 2 from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Is cheese the key to unlocking Alligator's mind prison?
ListenEP 36: Prisoner Of My Own Mind - Part 1 from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator thinks a soldering iron might allow him to esacape the prison of his own mind. What do you think?
ListenEP 35: Astral Neural Network from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator exercises his astral neural-network and comes up with a new thumb-tack tax.
ListenEP 34: The Case of the Ersatz Alligators from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator wrestles with the problem of ersatz alligators, but ends up reminiscing about cryptobiotic volleyball.
ListenEP 33: Don't Blame It On Me from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
After listening to this episode, you'll realize that everyone these days is stealing Alligator's trademarked idea.
ListenEP 32: Existential Exoskeleton from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator weaves together yarns about a pirate frog, a treasure trove, an indoor outhouse, and an existential exoskeleton. What more could you want?
ListenEP 31: Glops of Glue Stew from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator's big mouth finally gets shut.
ListenEP 30: PenUltimate Pop from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator has some P. U. just for you.
ListenEP 29: Acute Cute-itis from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator discovers that being too cute has consequences.
ListenEP 28: Electro-Magnetic Cheese Sandwich from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator longs for the latest in high-tech edibles.
ListenEP 27: Liquid Cutting from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator discovers a "new" property of liquids. But, as usual, he's all wet!
ListenEP 26: Hysterical Historians from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you want to learn how to make historians hysterical, you should hang with Alligator by listening to this episode of our podcast.
ListenEP 25: The Cheese Stretching Contest from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
If you plan to indulge in the latest fad, cheese stretching, you should first listen to this episode of our podcast.
ListenEP 24: The Point from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator raises a point, so you'd better get ready to parry!
ListenEP 23: I'm Ubiquitous from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
In this episode of our podcast, Alligator claims to be everywhere at once.
ListenEP 22: Dog Catcher from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
You'd better run when Alligator runs for public office.
ListenEP 21: Bull Shoot Artist - Part 2 from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
In Part Two of this podcast episode, Alligator incorporates a random number generator to enhance his BS artistry.
ListenEP 20: Bull Shoot Artist - Part 1 from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
In Part One of this podcast episode, Alligator abandons geekdom to become a "Bull Shoot Artist."
ListenEP 19: The Time Machine from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator invents the simplest time machine of all time.
ListenEP 18: Break On Through To The Other Side - Part 2 from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
As a result of his breakthrough, Alligator wonders what's real and what isn't.
ListenEP 17: Break On Through To The Other Side - Part 1 from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator's new drill-bit invention results in an unexpected breakthrough.
ListenEP 16: Porta Pota Pyramid from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator leaves something behind in his "Porta Pota Pyramid." And this is it:
ListenEP 15: Frapple Quandry from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator's "Theory of Quandry" leads to "Frapple."
ListenEP 14: The Bangity Clang Kitchen from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator interviews the "Bangity Clang" chef.
ListenEP 13: The Plunger Head People from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator digs The Plunger Head People.
ListenEP 11: Zombie Recipes from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator talks about pencil-chewing and zombies.
ListenEP 10: The Green Cheese Conspiracy from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator reveals that the moon actually IS made of green cheese!
ListenEP 9: The (K)not Machine from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator invents the (K)not Machine.
ListenEP 8: Ultra-Dimensional Hyper-Nonsense from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator resigns his position as Swamp Dictator.
ListenEP 7: Billy Bob Bog Butter from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator starts his own cooking show. But wait, there's more -- way too much more. .
ListenEP 6: DIY Brainectomy from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator explains how to perform a Brainectomy. But wait, there's more. . .
ListenEP 5: Split Personality from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator has an altercation with his alter-ego.
ListenEP 4: Script Writers from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator deals with some script writers in his own special way.
ListenEP 2: Book of Truth from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator introduces Alligator's Book of Truth to the simpering masses!
ListenEP 1: Out of Swamp Experience from 2021-01-31T22:10:42.023393
Alligator has an out-of-swamp experience
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