Podcasts by The X-Men Files

Issue234: Broodiest brood that ever brooded from 2023-11-20T08:06:16

Issue 233: More brood from 2023-11-20T07:55:06

Issue 232: Brood from 2023-11-12T20:31:29

The brood or something happens.

Issue 231: Colossus vs. Baba Yaga from 2023-08-08T14:53:34

Issue 229: Welcome to The Reavers, X-Men! from 2023-08-07T16:37:39

Issue 228: Something X-Men happens from 2023-07-25T15:16:41

Honestly, we recorded this one so long ago that I can't remember a thing about it.

Issue 227: Whatever from 2023-05-22T16:56:52

Wolverine is indifferent about being resurrected.

Issue 226: Forge, Storm, Vietnam, and NPR from 2023-05-18T11:04:30

Issue 102: Colossus is back! from 2023-03-24T08:25:35

'nuff said!

Issue 224: Longshot from 2023-03-05T19:31:22

Issue 223: Holy Toledo, we recorded one hundred episodes! from 2023-02-15T19:01:16

Yes, that's right, you've now had ONE HUNDRED opportunities to waste your time with us. Thanks for listening!

Issue 222: The X-Men visit the beaches of San Francisco from 2023-02-06T07:36:51

Issue 221: Read by Reading from 2023-02-01T09:26:09

Issue 220: The Interior of Ororo from 2023-01-23T20:44:11

A couple of eagles make love. Wolverine doesn't want to lead the X-Men. Ororo spends page after page wandering through Forge's abandoned penthouse. And it's all pretty good!

Issue 219: I have no idea what this issue is about from 2023-01-10T16:51:32

Recorded over a month ago, I have no memory of this thing.

Issue 218: Something about the X-Men from 2022-12-13T07:29:45

We recorded this a while ago and I have no recollection about the issue or the podcast episode. Exciting!

Issue 217:Ororo doesn’t stab people from 2022-10-23T19:46:18

Issue 215: The greatest generation plays the most dangerous game from 2022-10-19T13:49:07

Storm starts to fight some old geezers.

Issue 214: The X-Men something, something from 2022-10-19T07:45:18

Issue 213: Psylocke’s butterfly from 2022-09-12T07:40:43

The last episode of season one!!

Issue 212: Ororo’s leather jacket from 2022-08-29T07:22:16

The mutant massacre continues!

Issue 211: Mutant Massacre! from 2022-08-14T13:28:34

This is it, folks! After a long summer break, we're back to talk about the mutant massacre. Is it the first event comic in comics history? Is Chris Claremont to blame for event comics? We also d...

Issue 210: Clint Eastwood vs. the X-Men from 2022-07-05T15:47:02

We like this one! Brian didn't care for it when he was younger, but it's grown on him. We love catching up on multiple plot threads.

Issue 209: The enemy of my Hellfire Club is also my enemy from 2022-06-26T19:06:37

Mutants fight. And so on.

Issue 208: Mutants cubed! from 2022-06-20T14:58:33

Three groups of mutants have one great time! We enjoyed this week's issue. We also enjoyed talking about the weird selectivity of very old names and why we're cutting the Disney+ cord!

Issue 207: Wolverine, something something,Wolverine from 2022-06-06T08:07:34

SEO time! Wolverine, snikt, claws, Wolverine, Logan, Japan, Phoenix, Dark Phoenix, Wolverine, Wolverine

Issue 206: Freedom Force and bad fashion from 2022-05-22T17:40:57

Hot take: Star Wars is overrated! Listen here.

Issue 205: Claws make the man from 2022-05-08T19:50:28

We're back! Weird hiatus, but we're back with another one. Issue 205 and Claremont and Windsor-Smith have packed a powerful one! (pun intended) We also spoil the latest Dr. Strange.

Issue 204: Nightcrawler is alrightcrawler from 2022-04-10T14:59:11

Nightcrawler takes on Arcade and buckles are swashed!

The X-Men Files goes to Disney World! from 2022-04-03T23:23:48

Nothing at all about comics in this one. Just lots of straight talk about Disney World, where we just spent the past six days.

Issue 203: A little about the X-Men and a lot about The Batman from 2022-03-13T19:18:29

Who's the hottest Batman? Listen on, true believer!

Issue 202: The Beyonder is a bad boyfriend from 2022-02-28T11:50:53

The Beyonder is a jerk! The action in this issue is really boring ... or is it? We also talk about how critics may be reading too much into the audiences they're writing about and why Antonio Ba...

Issue 201: Lots of talking, lots of fun from 2022-02-20T20:42:26

We talk a lot about talking and we bring all five sense to bear this week! Also, Brian talks about his heel turn on Bobba Fett and we wonder just how much longer we'll keep sending money to Disn...

Issue 200: Magneto performs a splendid face turn from 2022-02-06T17:54:12

Claremont turns a villain into a hero and, folks ... it's credible! We dig into the classic issue #200, and perform a slow, mumbly recap. We talk about how our initial interest in Boba Fett is r...

Issue 199: Yay, Magneto! from 2022-01-30T20:01:53

Issue 198: We still love Ororo from 2022-01-24T10:48:10

We spend the first few minutes talking about power cords and the terrible people who run Apple. Eventually, we get around to talking about this week's issue: LifeDeath II. We love Ororo, we love...

Issue 197: The X-Men is 100% about Ororo from 2022-01-05T12:44:07

Arcade, Murderworld, etc.

Issue 196: A spoiler-rich environment from 2022-01-04T14:29

Kitty says the N-word. 'Nuff said?

Issue 195: Wolverine almost murders a child from 2021-12-12T13:35:41

We were on the fence about this issue, in which we see a whole lot of Power Pack. Who were they meant to appeal to anyway. We also discuss the topic of "fridging" and conclude that we might not ...

Issue 194: Juggernaut vs. capitalism from 2021-11-29T12:55:34

Juggernaut goes to the bank, Nimrod is NOT a gay icon, Brian was a jerk in middle school, and everyone ought to eat latkes any damn they want to.

Issue 193: The 100th anniversary of issue 94 from 2021-11-21T14:14:20

We're back with the X-Men! In addition to a rich discussion of moral obligation and the culture of victimhood, Brian and Inessa find time to talk about the war on Chanukah. We're not sure who's ...

Kitty Pryde and Wolverine issues 5&6 from 2021-11-18T08:28:29

Brian is back from his vision quest and we get to talk about comics again! The Kitty Pryde and Wolverine mini-series concludes and we're both fans. 

Kitty Pryde vs. Wolverine issues 3-4 from 2021-10-31T13:56:31

We discuss issues 3 and 4 of Kitty Pryde and Wolverine. In addition, we cover wokeness in sci-fi and elsewhere, Elon Musk, The Chair and take yet another cheap shot at Loki.

Kitty Pryde vs. Wolverine from 2021-10-16T12:33:57

We depart the main X-Men narrative for a side quest in Japan. We're trotting through the six issue miniseries: Kitty Pryde & Wolverine. Brian used to hate these characters, but now he's sort of ...

Issue 192: Enter the Magus from 2021-09-29T08:18:21

I have no recollection of what we talked about. The X-Men? Sure. Yeah. Let's go with that.

Issue 191: A Little Rapey from 2021-09-20T06:32:11

We're not cool with sexual violence.

Issue 190: Ishtar‘s Girdle from 2021-09-13T08:54:53

Do these descriptions matter? Let's find out!

Issue 189: Who the heck is Amara and why is she dressed like that? from 2021-09-06T16:53:20

Less preparation than usual, but no amount of preparation will help Inessa understand why we spend so much time with a character that we've not seen before in the pages of the X-Men. Is the issu...

Issue 188: Dapped with a zose of psionic whatsit from 2021-08-29T13:51:47

Brian has a Spoonerism while reading his recap, and he follows it up with a bummer story about this childhood. Meanwhile, Inessa looks extra pretty, it's hot in the south and we all need to know...

Issue 187: What's inside Forge's manhood? from 2021-08-15T17:29:24

Slightly divergent views on this one. Inessa isn't wild about the action, but Brian thinks it's a proto Die Hard. Neither of us are fans of the dire wraiths or relentless cross promotion. We als...

Issue 186: Claremont>Fellowes from 2021-08-08T14:56:13

Brian has grown up a lot since he first read this issue. We both love romance in our comics. The plot mechanics weren't perfect, but the X-Men is still better than Downton Abbey. Brian still won...

Issue 185: Smashing the Bechdel Test from 2021-08-01T22:01:47

Action packed! We have a terrific recap followed by musing about slackerdom and Generation X. Inessa is over it with the male gaze, while Ororo and Rogue have a fantastic heart to heart talk. In...

Issue 184: Forge has a cane from 2021-07-25T18:03:23

We meet the inventor genius Forge in this issue, and get our first look at his questionable fashion choices. He's not alone, though, as club owner Nick commits some sartorial crimes of his own. ...

Issue 183: Broken hearts and broken jaws from 2021-07-18T16:50:27

We're back! We finally talk through the fallout of Peter's breakup with Kitty and we are ... underwhelmed. Beautiful art and a few nice moments, but we hit the patriarchal speedbump pretty hard....

The Phoenix Saga from 2021-06-27T17:14:46

The 3rd biggest event in comics history! It's actually a bit more significant than that non-superlative would suggest. Inessa and Brian finally take on one of the most iconic storylines in comic...

X2: United We're Bland from 2021-05-26T13:24:05

Brian and Inessa (re)visit the film X2. Brian finds it wasn't as good as he remembered. Inessa fell asleep while watching. We also talk about "God Loves, Man Kills", good casting and how the fil...

Issue 182: Keep the change from 2021-05-16T17:03:55

Rogue isn't an action hero, she's tormented by the weight of her past choices, just like the rest of us. Is the universe a just place? Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn't. Claremont walks use...

Issue 181: Sleepy dragons from 2021-05-10T09:01:20

We combat our mutual Sunday afternoon fatigue, while the X-Men combat a couple of dragons. We talk about the 80's, legislated homophobia and cultural xenophobia. Thank heaven for a bit of escape...

Issue 180: The Mohawk in the Room from 2021-05-02T19:49:24

Back from hiatus, we're still looking for our groove. Talking about X-Men was pretty nice, though. We also touch on the work of John Carpenter and, um, other stuff. My brain still isn't all ther...

Issue 179: Nothing felicitous for Kitty from 2021-04-12T08:16:01

It's our fiftieth episode! Time for celebration and we celebrate by discussing ... statutory rape? Ew. OK, I guess that's all in aid of building up to some sort of point. No? Well, enjoy the epi...

WandaVision!! from 2021-03-28T16:39:43

The week, we talk WandaVision, with Mike, one of Brian's oldest friends. He's on board, but Brian isn't so sure. We also talk about the Disney entertainment hegemon, what critics don't seem to g...

Issue 178: Wolverine is comfortable being Wolverine from 2021-03-21T15:24:45

This one gets a little raunchy. It takes no more than a few minutes to use a crass euphemism for some forms of cancer and it's only downhill from there. We giggle, espouse our love for the TV sh...

Issue 177: The X-Men cannot be indestructible from 2021-03-14T19:48:50

As Dan Harmon taught us, any undefeatable character is a villain. We watch all of the X-Men get defeated in an imaginary sense, and then we watch Colossus get actually defeated. Brian thought th...

Issue 176: Cyclops can never retire from 2021-03-07T20:55:26

Cyke and Madelyne love to get down, Inessa likes politics, heroes can never retire and Brian rambles on and on and on.

Issue 175: Peak Cyclops from 2021-02-28T14:03:16

Once again Brian didn't write a recap and we all suffer as a result. Despite that, Inessa's mood improves by the end of the episode!

Issue 174: Spacey Soap Opera or Soapy Space Opera? from 2021-02-21T20:02:37

This is one is mostly talk and very little action. It's space opera! It's soap opera! It's both! Along the way, we get a window into Brian's sad pathetic life as a lonely comic book reader. But ...

Issue 173: Everything is socially awkward from 2021-02-15T09:38:40

One of the best issues of the X-Men is also one of the most awkward. Rogue tries to kiss Wolverine, Wolverine eventually kisses Rogue, Lilandra wants to kill Madelyn, Kitty wants to kill Ororo, ...

Issue 172: Brian has a crush on Rogue from 2021-02-07T15:12:27

Finally back to the Uncanny X-Men, having taken a lengthy Wolverine detour. Brian fails at saying something useful about Black History Month, but Inessa reads an amazing recap! Southwest used to...

Wolverine 4: Wolverine, the wrath of God from 2021-01-31T18:24:11

Although we loved this minseries, we've run out of things to say about it. Despite that, we say a few things anyway. We also share a few words about Werner Herzog, and why it's more fun to watch...

Wolverine 3: It's not whether Wolverine wins or loses from 2021-01-25T08:59:16

We continue to love Wolverine! That love is not shared with Ronald Reagan who gets some choice commentary from Brian. But first, Inessa continues to live recap like a champ. It's not about winni...

Issue nothing: Thwip vs. Snikt from 2021-01-10T21:51:22

Our first guests! We don't talk about a specific issue. Or, more accurately, we talk about a VERY significant issue: who would win in a fight between Spider-Man and Wolverine? Our guests have al...

Wolverine 2: Women are funny and violent from 2021-01-03T16:22:41

Women are funny, and they can be violent. Also, we talk about the 1982 Wolverine limited series.

Wolverine 1: Dead bear, dyin' Wolverine from 2020-12-27T20:52:59

We begin our read of the Wolverine limited series, a titanic meetup between two of the greatest talents in bronze age comics. We talk a bit about xenophobia and US (mis)representation of Japan, ...

Issue 171: Costume drama from 2020-12-21T21:37:02

We talk about Rogue, Walt Simsonson and ... Downton Abbey? Also, Brian continues to ramble about toxic masculinity and his fragile sense of self identity.

Issue 170: Dress for Success from 2020-12-06T21:41:22

Storm is magnificent, Paul Smith can draw women, but can he draw dresses? Incels are terrible people, outsiders might be forced to confront the existence of an inside. We love this issue and we ...

Issue 169: Gender neutral kidnapping from 2020-11-29T21:29:44

Two X-Men get kidnapped, but not necessarily in a patriarchal way. Still creepy, though. No recap again, but we promise we'll get professional again next week.

Issue 168: No recap? No problem! from 2020-11-15T21:02:29

Brian didn't write a recap, but Inessa recaps like a champ. We talk about how to raise children, the weird role of sex and violence, Yukio Mishima, how Americans lost their sense of humor, Ronal...

Issue 167: I think I'm a clone now from 2020-11-08T21:03:47

Honestly, I have no idea what we talked about apart from the issue. Lenin's preserved corpse and maybe some other stuff. Like, um, clones.

Issue 166: Double-sized Brood fun! from 2020-11-01T16:13:08

This is almost the end of the Brood saga. We've got one more, but this is the one that settles the question of what happens to all of the X-Men's x-eggs. Brian loved it, but Inessa was less sure...

Issue 165: Without clothes in outer space from 2020-10-25T21:40:42

We talk religion, adolescent sexual awakening, the Brood as maybe-kind-of a metaphor for abortion, and why Mike Pence is a terrible Christian. Also, we love Ororo. Did we mention that? Because w...

Issue 164: Whatever happened to Carol Danvers? from 2020-10-18T16:07:11

It's Minnesota month! And we spend that time talking a lot about Binary, an incarnation of Carol Danvers that didn't appear to go anywhere in particular. We have some kind words to say about Dav...

Issue 163: Three's company; the Brood is a crowd from 2020-10-12T09:15:07

We enjoyed this issue, but didn't have much to say about it, so we talked about Three's Company and zombies instead.

Issue 162: Wolverine vs.The Brood from 2020-10-04T16:38:45

Everything else has been prologue to this. Wolverine, all by himself fights an entire planet filled with Brood, giant spiders, a space carcass, and a recurrent tummy ache. The roller coaster has...

Issue 161: Flashback with a side of ick from 2020-09-28T08:27:40

In this issue, Professor X finally comes out of his catatonic state (um, spoilers?), but not before we learn about how he met Magneto and an emotionally scarred woman name Gabrielle. Chuck abuse...

Issue 160: In just a few seconds, everything changes from 2020-09-21T09:16:14

It's Missourri week at The X-Men Files, and this week we will "show me" Ororo in various states of undress, an old demon's junk, lots of bone, magic and child endangerment. This is a good one! T...

Annual 6: One vampire is great! Two is ... meh. from 2020-09-17T16:56:12

Drac is back, and we prepare for another Drac attack, jack! This one left us feeling more lukewarm than the prior week. This is all the proof we require that vampire stories need some sort of un...

Issue 159: Public domain enemy #1! from 2020-08-30T20:33:33

This is it! The X-Men encounter a deadly foe without the encumbrance of intellectual property law! We discuss the appeal of vampire stories and draw no conclusions and somehow we don't name chec...

Issue 158: A grounded story about regular people from 2020-08-23T16:01:01

We talk about Obama hanging out in our closet, the private lives of public politicians, a thin argument against libertarianism and Inessa finally learns what a mutant is.

Issue 157: The Brood is for closers only from 2020-08-16T15:14:28

This one is action packed! We cover Alec Baldwin, SLP taping speed for VHS cassettes, the appeal of murder/suicide, how Nightcrawler doesn't get enough credit for packing a punch and - most sign...

Issue 156: Was the Earth destroyed nearly 40 years ago? from 2020-08-09T16:02:30

A gripping recap is followed by a conversation about lots of comics that AREN'T the X-Men. We get back on track with a discussion of the thematic themes in this issue and superhero stories gener...

Issue 155: Fighting with frenemies from 2020-08-02T11:28:07

The audio for this one is good, I promise! The issue is also back on track. We meet the Shi'ar, one of Brian's favorite alien societies. We learn that Professor X is really more of a concubine t...

Issue 154: The fight scene is almost as bad as the audio from 2020-08-02T11:21:56

Full disclosure: the audio for this one is terrible. I don't know what happened. Happily, subpar audio is matched with a subpar issue. Corsair is back, but not much else happens. Even I might no...

Issue 153: Naughty Bedtime Stories from 2020-07-22T08:54:07

To help Ilyana fall asleep, Kitty tells a story in which a character named Kitty is a asleep and having an erotic dream. It's a night time Roman à clef! The X-Men play themselves, with a special...

Issue 152: The Hellfire Club is basically the Girl Scouts from 2020-07-12T14:52:58

Mind swapping and body horror! When's the ideal time to kill Hitler? The Girl Scouts, the Illuminati and the Hellfire Club are all basically the same thing! Also, weather will always rip the clo...

Issue 151: Touching the weather with someone else's body from 2020-07-04T10:17:37

This is a great one! Kitty leaves Xavier's school, Ororo and Emma Frost have a significant encounter, Peter wears a Speedo, we encounter a preppy, and Brian explains to his Jewish wife why he's ...

Issue 150: He's got some good ideas from 2020-06-29T12:44

How do we cram a double-sized issue into a single-sized episode? Easy! We record when Brian is in a bad mood. Bad mood or not, we can't resist the allure of silver fox Magneto and his, actually,...

The X-Men Files go to the movies! from 2020-06-23T12:55:38

We all saw 2020's The X-Men on Saturday night and we're here with our thoughts. First, though, we waste a lot of time talking about what happened and where we were living in July 2020! It's bori...

Issue 149: And the living shall be bored to death from 2020-06-16T19:42:34

I'm not gonna lie to you, folks. This is a difficult one. We hit a series low point as the X-Men travel to the southern hemisphere armed with flashlights. They kill time waiting for issue 150 wh...

Issue 148: Why is any of this happening? from 2020-06-09T14:11

An issue with both a lot and a little going on. Cyclops and Lee have a ridiculous fight, Banshee meets his daughter after conducting some small engine repair, Moira is mad, and, uh ... Spider Wo...

Issue 147: Put some clothes on her! from 2020-05-31T13:35

The new, newy, newish musical music, our first use of the 80's stinger and we both wish that our heroines had more clothes on.

Issue 146: Even worse than the real Space Mountain from 2020-05-26T00:00

Walt Disney is a terrible person! The DCU can't hold a candle to the MCU no matter how much we focus! Space Mountain is a terrible ride! Counterpoint: it isn't!

Issue 145: Stormy Doom from 2020-05-25T12:47

A week after we meet the Fantastic Four, we meet the FF's arch-nemesis: Doctor Doom! The Latverian monarch formerly known as Orderly Doom menaces our heroes. But first, we visit Lincoln Center a...

Annual 5: Storming the castle with a shawarma scene from 2020-05-12T16:11

We celebrate Mother's Day and almost immediately start tossing around a crass bit of slang. We meet the Fantastic Four, and Brian talks about how tremendous the Invisible Woman is. We storm the ...

Issue 144: Up with hope! from 2020-05-06T13:22

In which we talk about the best weapon against despair, the weird history of the Man-Thing, using super powers for home repair, and why Brian loves it when children get teased!

Issue 143: Home Alone ... with Monsters! from 2020-04-29T14:47

We talk about comparative religion, strong heroines, the Alien movie franchise and we do it all with a big E rating slapped on the episode! We bid a fond farewell to thigh-loving Canadian, John ...

Issue 142: The past is prologue from 2020-04-28T19:47

We conclude our discussion of the classic Days of Future Past. Speaking of time, this week we switch to recording in the morning! Crossbows make excellent murder weapons!

Issue 141: Days of Future Present from 2020-04-21T09:18

Our past is someone else's future, and the past future has its own past that's trying to change the future, but not OUR future. Also, Kitty calls herself Kate when she grows up - a thing which h...

Issue 139-140: Welcome to the X-Men Files, hope you survive the experience! from 2020-04-11T14:01

Following a meta issue, we dive into our first real story. Kitty Pryde joins the X-Men, where her first challenge is to clean a broom closet. Wolverine and Nightcrawler go to Canada where we hea...

Issue 138: Exit Cyclops, enter podcast from 2020-04-05T10:07

Inessa reads her very first X-men comic and this one tells the entire history of the X-Men! We go deep into the meta elements of this comic. The navel gazing continues as Brian talks about the s...