Podcasts by Xena Warrior Business
A mighty podcast forged in the heat of battle, all about Xena Warrior Princess!
Further podcasts by Chris Sims and Allison Stock
Podcast on the topic TV und Film
All episodes
S6E21 - THE PINCHING OF THE PINCH from 2023-10-27T10:00
We've reached Xena's final story, and the fucks have run dry. There are no fucks left to give. The penulimate episode of Xena Warrior Princess brings us back, yet again, into Xena's d...
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The Quick and The Dead (1995) Commentary Track (COMMENTARAIMI) from 2023-10-13T10:00
We let out listeners pick our last CommentaRAIMI movie, and so we watched Sam Raimi's meticulously stylish tournament arc of a movie We talk about the appeal of Westerns, movies where...
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S6E20 - Annie Day's Degradation Kink from 2023-09-29T10:00
Bad news, everyone! A new Xena scroll has been discovered, and it says that Xena might have been a heterosexual! Does this mean Rob Tapert will finally give us season 7? Or will Xena ...
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S6E19 - Many Sapphic Returns from 2023-08-11T10:00
It's Gabrielle's birthday, so you know it's time for some psychological torture. It's also time to deprogram a rescued virgin sacrifice, and to meet one of the goofiest villains we've seen in a ...
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S6E18 - Across the Caesarverse from 2023-07-28T11:00
Julius Caesar, unsatisfied with his ending, comes back from the dead to rewrite the show Xena Warrior Princess. Will Xena and Gabrielle still fall in love, or will they meet a different, more tr...
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S6E17 - Friendtaur to the Centaurs from 2023-07-14T10:00
The victory lap continues, with Chris and Ally are well on their way to seeing Xena Warrior Princess to completion. But first, they must contend with yet another human/centaur birth, and all the...
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S6E16 - Don't Bother, They're Here... from 2023-06-23T10:15
Isn't it rich? Xena and Gab? Lesbian heroes of old...cloned in a lab? In a time of modern struggles and civil unrest, the nation cried out for a hero, and a reincarnated sorcerer teams up with s...
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S6E15 - Ancient Greek Geneva Convention Violations from 2023-06-09T10:00
When a warlord with a grudge captures the Amazon queen, ancient green World War II breaks out! Is this the end of the Amazons? Might be! Join Chris and Ally as we watch this strong nation get bl...
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S6E14 - Mixed Martial Amazons from 2023-05-26T10:00
Join us as we recall the famous tale of the scorpion and the, uh... swan? After giving the god of war his god powers back, Xena now has to contend with the consequences: the Amazons are doing wa...
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S6E13 - I Can't Believe It's Not a Clip Show! from 2023-05-12T10:00
How far would you go to get the scoop? Modern day journalist Nigel travels from heaven to hell and everywhere in between to find out the truth about Xena Warrior Princess, (and her re...
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S6E12 - Little Boots from 2023-04-28T10:00
It's time, folks. We're finally doing it: We're cancelling Caligula. This oddball episode felt like dropping in on a random episode of a tv show you've never seen... so we got special...
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S6E11 - A Time of Ancient Logs from 2023-04-14T10:00
This episode shows that having the high ground does not always provide you with the advantage. Xena may have met her equal match in Morlock, and teams up with a rebellious young amazo...
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S6E10 - Dark Shingo of the Soul from 2023-03-31T10:09
After a heavy trilogy of action, intrigue and character growth, we take a step back to reconnect with life's simple pleasures, as Xena and Gabrielle help Ares go undercover as a farme...
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Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022) Commentary Track... The COMMENTARAIMI from 2023-03-17T12:03
Despite their different opinions on the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Chris and Ally join up for a real Phase 4 treat, and to celebrate Sam Raimi's long-awaited return to the director's ...
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S6E9 - Beowulf Minus Beowulf from 2023-03-03T13:58
As the [lord of the] ring[s] trilogy comes to a close, we reflect on a lesson from the story of Beowulf: good things wont always be good. You can be in the black one day, and in the r...
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S6E8 - The The Ring Cycle Cycle from 2023-02-17T11:00
This episode shows that anyone can change. A warlord can turn into one of the good guys. A valkyrie can turn into a tree monster. Another valkyrie can turn into a fire. Amid these les...
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S6E7 - Sealed with a Kiss from 2023-01-27T10:00
What do a German opera, a Scandinavian myth and an Old English epic poem have ...
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S6E6 - A Horizontal Abyss from 2023-01-13T11:13
Xena Warrior Princess the show finally deals with the downsides of having killed off their comic relief. This episode, which was clearly an inventory script, asks the tough questions,...
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S6E5 - Down in the Gab Hole from 2022-12-19T11:55
This silly episode has everything. Manslaughter. Ethnic cleansing. The disappointing realization that your heroes are flawed people. It scared Chris so badly that he had to fake being...
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S6E4 - Gurkhan Off from 2022-11-18T11:00
The Gurkh store called, and they're running out of you! This episode strives to answer the question of our lifetime: Who's Gurkhan? Gabrielle wants vengeance, Xena wants Gabrielle's head to stay...
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Army of Darkness (1993) Commentary Track... The COMMENTARAIMI from 2022-11-04T10:33
London bridge is falling down, my fair lady! After over 5 years of watching executive producer Sam Raimi's hit action/adventure show Xena Warrior Princess, Chris and Ally are diving d...
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S6E3 - The Devil Clause from 2022-10-21T10:00
Xena has bent Odysseus's bow. She set in motion the murder of Julius Caesar. She heralded the birth of Jesus Christ. The throne of hell is vacant, but won't be for long. Will Xena accept her fat...
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S6E2 - Taunted and Haunted from 2022-10-07T10:00
As Halloween approaches, there's only one thing to do: It's time for Xena to fight the devil! A hellmouth opened up in Xena's childhood home, turning it into a haunted house. But the spirits are...
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S6E1 - Her Longest Yeah Boy Ever from 2022-09-23T10:00:44
Welcome to the sixth and final season of Xena! We really are in the endgame now, and the fanfic writers have breached the fourth wall, the fanction is now coming from inside the writer's roo...
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S5E22 - Everything but the Christ from 2022-07-22T10:00:01
It's the end of Season 5, and the end of the pantheon of Greek gods! Chris and Ally continue their debate on implied vs. explicit Christianity, while Xena and Gabrielle continue to struggle with...
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S5E21: Don't Call it a Tomb Womb! from 2022-07-08T16:48:27
Continuing where Livia left off, Eve continues to be super good at killing people, making everyone a bit unsure of how to deal with her. Chris discovers the benefits of transformative...
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S5E20 - The Distant Future from 2022-06-24T10:00
Xena punches her way out of her own coffin only to find out that she and Gabrielle have been dead for 25 years… and that her baby daughter Eve grew up to become the greatest warlord t...
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S5E19 - Death In Chair 2: Still Chairin’ from 2022-06-10T10:30:02
What happens when the person you love has changed so much that they no longer embody the characteristics that made you fall in love in the first place? Anyway, Xena has to pull off a fuckery to ...
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Darkman (1990) Commentary Track... The COMMENTARAIMI from 2022-05-27T10:39:29
What would you do if you could only have skin for 99 minutes? After over 5 years of watching executive producer Sam Raimi's hit action/adventure show Xena Warrior Princess, Chris and ...
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S5E18 - Threeopatra Comin' Atcha! from 2022-05-13T10:00:05
Xena goes undercover as Cleopatra, whose navy is about to be exploited for the Roman empire. This episode is a vestigial reinforcement of the heteronormative agenda, and we hated it. As Chris says...
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S5E17 - Joxing Off from 2022-04-29T10:00:58
Do you ever think about what you're going to do with the rest of your life? You know, when you're too old to do kicks and stuff. Or, alternately, have you ever jerked it in the woods to a lake f...
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S5E16 - Inuyasha Selma Blair from 2022-04-15T09:00
This episode was cobbled together with found footage from a failed television pilot where Selma Blair does an Inuyasha and becomes queen of the Amazons, and it shows! Chris reveals th...
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S5E15 - Sascha and Mary With Fischstäbchen from 2022-04-01T10:00:53
To celebrate this very special episode, Chris and Ally are joined by Mary and Sascha, the hosts of Radio Amphipolis, Germany’s number o...
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S5E15 - Hit it from the Back from 2022-03-18T10:00:19
In this episode, Xena tells it like it i...
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S5E13 - Elevate the Baby! from 2022-02-25T19:49:19
It's baby Eve's first big adventure, and she and mama Xena have to outrun the armies of three angry gods that want them dead. Meanwhile, Joxer is still (still!!!) trying to reconcile his feeling...
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Gabbysode #14 - Last! Herc! Ever! from 2022-02-11T11:00:01
We know we swore off Sorbo (we Sworbo’d off Sorbo) but we just had to get this last one out of our system. Becaues the writers of Hercules the Legendary Journeys have lost control of ...
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S5E12 - Closing Time from 2022-01-28T11:00:56
Folks, it's baby time! Xena's still got a bun in the oven, and that bun is doing dropkicks! As our warrior princess contends with the dangerous world she's about to bring a child into, the Twili...
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S5E11 - Latent Tendencies from 2022-01-14T15:14:25
This episode is burdened by two framing devices, each made weaker by the inclusion of the other. Will Ally make Chris laugh? Will Chris lose the bet? Find out!
We watch Season 5 Episode ...
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S5E10 - The Baddest Mamma Jammer This Side of Thrace from 2021-12-24T11:00
Chris and Ally take on one of the lost episodes of Xena (a jukebox musical that was too expensive for Netflix) and learn that things that are funny in the writer's room aren't always funny on tv...
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S5E9 - Oops! All Martyrs from 2021-12-10T11:00
Have you become numb to the violence? If so, this episode is just for you! Xena sort of finds out who her baby daddy is, Chris and Ally sort of try to understand exactly what that means, and Ren...
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S5E8 - DaphZee from 2021-11-26T11:30
In a classic "be careful what you wish for" hijinks episode, Xena finds herself in a situation that Chris and Ally really struggle with trying to describe. Ally gets dazzled by Renee O'Connor's ...
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S5E7 - She Has Many (s)Kills from 2021-11-05T10:30
With Lucy Lawless still medically prohibited from doing backflips, we get a whole episode where Xena stands in one place and doesn't move. The show also gives us something we haven't ...
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S5E6 - A Moment for Feet from 2021-10-29T11:00
Xena learns that Lao Ma might not have been a great mom, Gabrielle gives Joxer a foot job, and Joxer becomes obsessed with sizeable holes. Meanwhile, in the real world, Chris learns that Chinese...
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S5E5 - Them Will Be Bones from 2021-10-15T15:08:07
Well, listeners, it seems like Chris and Ally are going to have to learn the ways of the shamaness... sooner than you thought. Your hosts are back from hiatus and are joined by Xenite and drag q...
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Gabbysode #13 - The Rift from 2021-08-21T01:23:52
From Chris's JRPG pon farr to Ally's obsession with anime boxing, your dashing podcast hosts catch you up on what they've been up to, and answer some listener-submitted questions. Sorry for the ...
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S5E4 - Horse Springs Eternal from 2021-06-11T11:00
In a very busy episode jam-packed with so many things happening at the same time, Xena asks an important Yahoo question: "Am i gregnant?" Meanwhile, Gabrielle is living having her own Lifetime O...
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S5E3 - XOXO, Warrior Princess from 2021-05-28T09:30
Having rediscovered the joy of murder, Xena wants to do all of the murders herself. However, now that Gabrielle is done being a pacifist, she would like to do some murders of her own, thank you ...
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S5E2 - Riddle Me This from 2021-04-30T10:00
Whether you prefer the goofier episodes or lean more towards the dramatics, it can't be denied that Chakram is a very significant episode of Xena Warrior Princess. It has character development, ...
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S5E1 - Monotheism be Hitting Different from 2021-04-16T10:30
We start season 5 off on a high note: Xena and Gabrielle are dead. Anyway, we're doing bible! It's an episode about bible, in a way that only Xena Warrior Princess can give us. Our heroes get ca...
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CENA WRESTLER BUSINESS from 2021-04-01T11:00
In a time of wrestling gods, brawlers, and rings, the people cried out for a hero... and his name was John Cena!
From heel to hero, John Cena and his incredibly thick body have captivated...
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Gabbysode #12 - Young Hercules (aka REAL Hercules) from 2021-03-26T11:30
Flat-earthers beware: Ryan Gosling has entered the chat. Chris and Ally have finally watched some Young Hercules. It had child star turned A-list celeb Ryan Gosling in the titular role, and was ...
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S4E22 - Vigilante Underwear from 2021-03-12T13:30
As the old saying goes, always the Joxer...
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S4E21 - March Fifteenth from 2021-02-26T12:00
"I am just so tired of fake friends." -Julius Caesar
It's the ides of March, y'all!!! Come for the major historical event, stay for Chris's excellent Callisto impression. Both hosts are t...
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S4E20 - Pompey Circumstance from 2021-02-12T14:30
Oh Gabby, we're really in the endgame now! With the Amazons at risk of dying out, Xena kidnaps Brutus to use him against the Roman triumvirate. Meanwhile, Gabrielle has to prove that she's still...
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S419 - Takes Horse to Know Horse from 2021-01-29T14:00
Whodunnit? WHO CARES! It's a real Xena She Wrote in this goofy episode. When a bounty hunter turns up dead, it's up to Xena and the gang to find the murderer before Discord (the goddess of unmod...
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S4E18 - Horse Grumbles from 2021-01-15T15:00
Chris and Ally survived 2020 exclusively to talk about the Xena episode with one of the best scripts... and some of the dumbest fight stuff in the entire series. Joxer has his first kill, Najara...
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S4E17 - Ancient Greek Message of Peace from 2020-12-11T10:30
It's time to get meta with this one-off episode all about Ancient Greek The Producers. While Xena goes off to take care of a warlord in the next town over, Gabrielle runs into a pair ...
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Gabbysode #11 - Uberfic Revisited from 2020-12-04T11:00
In this bonus episode, Chris and Ally (aka Carlos Von Dracula and Skye V. Hickle) sift through a sea of broken links to find two more uberfics to read and discuss with you all. Brace yourself fo...
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S4E16 - The Disclaimer from 2020-11-27T10:00
We've finally made it through the the India Arc, which ended just as it began: with wildly graphic dismemberment. This controversial episode inspired anger from Hindu protesters and halfhearted ...
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S4E15 - The Girl With the Sapphic Tattoo from 2020-11-13T10:00
As you know, if you die in Greece, you go to Tartarus. If you die in the Matrix, you die in real life. But if you die in India (noted land of exotic mystery), you get reincarnated. Xe...
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S4E14 - India Stuff from 2020-10-23T09:00
In search of inner peace, Gabrielle leads Xena to a mystical and exotic land of snake charmers, sword swallowers, and a rainfall of dismembered limbs! We've been dreading this arc for years, but...
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S4E13 - A Very Subtle Bed from 2020-10-09T09:30
Listeners, draw yourself a relaxing bath and tuck yourself into your yin yang bed, because we're finally talking about Paradise Found, an episode that feels like a Star Trek shore leave one shot...
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S4E12 - Where's Your Sports Bra, Gabrielli? from 2020-09-25T07:30
Folks, a tragedy has struck. Pour one out for Gabrielle’s good outfit. The green sports bra is no more. Other than that, this episode is a one-off filler Cinderella story with bad wig...
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S4E11 - A Kidnapping for a Kidnapping Makes the Whole World Kidnapped from 2020-09-11T08:00
This is episode of Xena Warrior Princess where everything about it is... just a little bit worse than it needed to be. It's a rehash of the last Hoarde episode, only this time a blond...
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Gabbysode #10 - Monkey Business (pilot) from 2020-08-28T08:00
This Patreon-funded bonus episode is act...
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S4E10 - Deus Ex Mach-Xena from 2020-08-14T08:00
Autolycus, Joxer and Meg team up to kidnap a baby, do some hijinks, and steal a priceless treasure, while Chris demonstrates his penchant for acronyms. Meanwhile, Ally is caught off g...
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S4E9 - Pobody's Nerfect from 2020-07-31T08:30
Well, we’ve got yet another episode where Xena feels bad about her dark past, but this one actually slaps. Xena realizes that she has a copycat warlord following in her footsteps, whi...
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S4E8 - Oh, look! Swans! from 2020-07-17T10:00
As the dreaded India arc looms ever closer, Gabrielle, in a stunning display of being too busy seeing the good in other people to learn from her mistakes, falls in with yet another cult. Chris a...
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S4E7 - Crab Island from 2020-07-03T10:00
This fortnight Chris and Ally talk about Locked Up and Tied Down, the horniest name for the least horny episode of Xena Warrior Princess. The show keeps forgetting its stance on murde...
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S4E6 - Foot Lucy Lawless from 2020-06-19T10:00
No good has ever come from a dance. If you've seen Footloose, you can probably skip this episode of Xena, but don't skip this episode of Xena Warrior Business! Wannabe dictator Shitty Steve is r...
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S4E5 - What is it Good For? from 2020-05-22T15:36:41
Maybe she’s born with it — maybe it’s helmetrey! In these unprecedented times, Chris and Ally find themselves at an impasse, with Chris bemoaning this episode’s redundancy while Ally ...
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Gabbysode #9 - Simping for Hercules from 2020-05-08T10:00
"Within us all there are two Kevin Sorbo...
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S4E3 - WLW aka Women Love Wandering from 2020-05-01T16:43:55
Windmills, how do they work? After realizing that Gabrielle is alive, Xena returns to Potidea to find her, but stumbles across a rubber suit monster instead. Classic Ra...
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S4E2 - They're Just in Russia from 2020-04-17T09:00
That awkward moment when you think you've traveled to a mystical land but actually you just went to Russia... so relatable. In the strangest and most controversial episode to date, Xena proves t...
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S4E1 - A Classic Skoodlee-doo from 2020-04-03T10:00
We're sorry, Xena, but your Gabby is in ...
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GABBYSODE #8 - Implied Bathroom Stuff from 2020-03-27T15:32:41
We promised Jack, so you get Jack! Chris and Ally discuss episode 2 of Jack of All Trades (Listen
S4E4 - A Sickday in the Life from 2020-03-20T10:00
Coming to you live from quarantine, Chris and Ally jump forward to possibly the sickest episode of the entire show. It just felt right. After all the trials and tribulations of Dahak and Hope, i...
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S3E22 - 2 Sacri 2 Fice from 2020-03-06T15:40:33
In our last episode of Xena Warrior Princess season 3, Chris and Ally discuss ceiling shields as an architectural staple. Hope has hatched from her cocoon and there is havoc to be wreaked. Also,...
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S3E21.5 - The Good Episode Hole from 2020-02-21T16:47:39
Please don’t be too disaPPOINTED!!!, but Chris and Ally had to watch two more hercules episodes before they could finish season 3 of Xena. Anyway at least you get to learn what a mumf...
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S3E21 - The Goddess GOObrielle from 2020-01-31T17:28:28
On this episode of Gourmet Makes, Claire Saffitz attempts to make a human sacrifice to the goddess. As we enter the final arc of Season 3, Chris and Ally are joined by special guest Alex Reulofs...
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GABBYSODE #7 - Penultimate Situation (aka the "Big Boy") from 2020-01-24T16:35:33
In lieu of having to watch and talk abou...
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S3E20 - ATHENACEPTION from 2020-01-17T13:00
This episode was just fine, but apparently the creative team involved HATED it. Feast your ears on (the analysis of) a performance that makes Lucy Lawless cringe to this day! Ally and Chris reun...
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S3E19 - Wet Cabbages from 2019-12-20T16:41:10
This episode took Chris's love of Autolycus and Ally's love of boat stuff and SPAT IN OUR FACES. A fuckboy, a toothman and a slave owner walk into a boat. What do you get? A boring, pretty usele...
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S3E18 - Lotta Weird Fishing from 2019-12-06T20:06:41
Ally is wrist-deep in a bass, and Chris has drowned in his own reflection. In this manic one-off episode, Aphrodite steals the north star and our heroes find themselves OBSESSED with different s...
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S3E17 - Mnemosyne Mnonsense from 2019-11-22T15:55:40
Despite taking the time to proactively overcome her issues in multiple episodes now, Gabrielle seems to be struggling once again with the memory of her past misdeeds. Enchanted breast...
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S3E16 - Hot for Caesar from 2019-11-08T11:30
Chris and Ally both survived their respective plane rides, so now they get to talk about an episode that is the most dear to us in all the world. It's 'When in Rome,' with stellar costumes, a su...
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S3E15 - Ally Got Conned! from 2019-10-24T10:00
Joxer, aka a "little nothing boy", is beaten within an inch of his life by a shady casino mogul. Sounds like a great set-up for some heist hijinks and absolute tomfoolery! Chris and Ally learn t...
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S3E14 - White People Dreads from 2019-10-11T23:55
After the high point that was The Bitter Suite, the decline of Xena Warrior Princess continues with FORGIVENESS, an episode that is almost as bad as the dreadlocks/mu...
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S3E13 - The Hands of a Sissy from 2019-09-27T17:00:44
This episode exists, for some reason, but Chris and Ally aren't really sure why. It hits all the emotional beats of a good episode of Xena, but its place in the timeline makes it feel downright ...
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S3E12 - The Bitter Suite Life of Xena and Gabrielle from 2019-08-30T14:37:10
Y'all ready for some Tarot business or what? Xena and Gabrielle's rift has come to a head, things can't possibly get any worse, so the only way out is through. Through SONG, that is! Ally and Ch...
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S3E11 - Hope Floats from 2019-08-16T12:00
After a slew of wacky hijinks episodes with zany fun and kooky jokes, it's time to get sad. Xena takes us back to uncanny valley, aka centaur hell, and not even Callisto can make this better. Th...
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S3E10 - Amelia Bedelia and the Scroll of Destiny from 2019-08-02T12:00
In a totally significant turn of events, Gabrielle finds herself writing her Xena fanfiction on an enchanted scroll! This episode channels some serious Amelia Bedelia energy as absolute hijinks ...
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S3E9 - Summer Squash from 2019-07-19T16:36:55
Praise Hestia, it's a new episode! If season 2 was the good season, season 3 has got to be the NICE season. This episode gives us 3 Xenas, barely any Gabrielle, and a Joxer that fucks???? I'm so...
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S3E8 - A Soggy William from 2019-07-05T11:00
In this episode, Ally learns what a bottle episode is, Chris is flummoxed by the beauty of Gina Torres, and the concept of Xena Minus Xena is thoroughly explored. Ally also brings up ...
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S3E7 - Sapphic Skydancers from 2019-06-21T16:28:23
Put a door around your wife's neck and backhand her across the face, because all is not well in The Debt part 2. Xena's basement is flooded, while Gabrielle's loyalty is not so much questioned a...
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S3E6 - China Stuff from 2019-06-11T12:27:35
Join Chris and Ally and special guest Cathy Leamy (@metrokitty) as they delve into the most sapphic episode of Xena to date. THE DEBT (par...
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GABBYSODE #6 - Call Whoosh by Your Boing from 2019-05-28T16:05:13
Dust off your goatees and wear a headband directly across your forehead, because Chris and Ally are talking about the mirrorverse, babey!!! The Hercules: The Legendary Journeys episode called St...
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S3E5 - Gabrielle's Abs from 2019-04-23T16:00
In the midst of Passover, Easter AND 4/20, Chris and Ally get together to talk about the midst of Renee O'Connor. That is... Gabrielle's abs! Honestly there is just so much talk about fake baby ...
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S3E4 - My Life With the Thrill Kilt Cult from 2019-04-03T03:58:45
Chris and Ally have finally arrived at the Dahak arc, a dark and very drawn out period in the timeline of Xena Warrior Princess. But before we get too deep into messiahs and devils and the end o...
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S3E3 - Six Thousand Decent Kills from 2019-03-12T16:00
Loosely inspired by The Dirty Dozen, The Dirty Half Dozen gives us yet another story about bad guys teaming up to stop worse guys. Some radical bro gets his hands on some unbreakable, impenetrab...
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S3E2 - Then Put Your Little Hand In Mine from 2019-02-28T02:06:18
Hurry up and ditch Ned Ryerson, because we've finally made it to the groundhog day episode of Xena, Warrior Princess! In what is honestly one the best episodes we've seen so far, Been There, Don...
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S3E1 - THIS is the God Place! from 2019-02-13T17:45:25
Persecution or madness? I say, porque no los dos? In the season 3 premier (sort of), Xena gets a bad review and gets burdened with both (although the madness ends up being the real pr...
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S3E0 - The Gods Are Wildly Impotent! from 2019-01-29T15:50:38
Happy new year!! Chris and Ally are back and starting 2019 off strong! Special guest James D’Amato (@OneShotRPG), having somehow managed ...
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S2E22 - Horny On Main from 2018-12-11T09:00
Mere weeks after discussing the Xena XXX Porn Parody, Chris and Ally are flustered yet again with an unabashedly horny episode of Xena -- perhaps the horniest episode yet! Karl Urban's protrudin...
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S2E21 - My Name is Ocean Farm from 2018-11-27T17:00
This episode makes Allison happy, because it's filled with boat stuff, and makes Chris aprehensive because boat stuff sounds a bit like... some other stuff, the likes of which we discussed in ou...
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GABBYSODE #5 - The Xena Porn from 2018-11-13T06:21:29
You guys. It's time. Carlos VonDracula and his asexual pal are finally ready to talk about XXXena, aka Xena XXX, aka, THE XENA PORN. With a runtime of 2 hours and 47 minutes, this porn parody ha...
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S2E20 - A Wizard Did It! from 2018-10-16T19:58:51
Here's a nice, fun episode about nice, fun things: colonialism and PTSD! While Gabrielle is off discovering Charles Darwin's theory of evolution, Xena is reconnecting with her dark side. Special...
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S2E19 - Poseidon, Wetly Screaming from 2018-10-02T09:00
This is the story of how Xena un-fucks the Odyssey. Aka, There And Back Again: A Ulysses Tale. Chris and Ally are joined by special guest, ancient greek historical expert and parent of the year ...
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S2E18 - Dangling for Fun and Profit from 2018-09-18T16:14:45
So this episode ended up being a bit of a snooze, so Chris and Ally invite special guest Javier Grillo-Marxuach (@OKBJGM) to talk about the Xena reboot ...
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S2E17 - Cause of Death: JUSTICE from 2018-09-05T15:50:17
This is Lucy Lawless's first episode of THE ENTIRE SEASON where she's back in fighting form, and special guest Amanda Meadows (@amandonium) joins us ...
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S2E16 - Big Sword Energy from 2018-08-07T10:00
Last episode gave us a day in the life of Xena and Gabrielle. This episode gave us a day in the life... of Joxer, canon incel and total dweeb. At least until a bell rings, turning him into eithe...
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S2E15 - Hottest Warrior in the Butt-Kicking Biz from 2018-07-24T23:44:34
From fangirl to beloved wife, Gabrielle has gone through a considerable glow-up. This Valentine's Day episode does exactly what it says on the tin, documenting just a normal day in the life of l...
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S2E14 - The Woman Shape from 2018-07-10T15:33:22
What's better than an immortal god who hates you? TWO immortal gods who hates you! Hope you like low-budget mysticism, because this episode is full of it! Chris and Ally are joined by special gu...
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S2E13 - Warrior Princess Coffin from 2018-06-27T02:08:03
Show's over, folks. Xena, the warrior princess, is dead. We are joined by special guest James D'Amato (@OneShotRPG), a noted fan of kissing. He brin...
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S2E12 - 600 Years of Karl Urban from 2018-06-12T07:00
There's a ton of firsts in this episode! The first time Xena was crucified, the first time Xena DIES and THE FIRST TIME XENA USED THE PINCH!! It also marks the first appearance of baby Karl Urba...
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S2E11 - Of Pageants and Pronouns from 2018-05-30T01:05:37
Coming down from Chris's favorite episode of Xena, we now have the episode that Chris was dreading the most! The mainstream media didn't really know the difference between being trans and doing ...
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S2E10 - Using Every Part of the Xena from 2018-05-15T07:00
We’re perpetuating the war on Christmas by skipping A Solstice Carol (Listen
S2E8 - Whose Body Is It Anyway? from 2018-05-02T00:54
When Lucy Lawless fell off a horse, Hudson Leick took the reins! That's right, it's a Xena in Callisto's body episode, where we learn that the opposite of war isn't peace: it's losing your godda...
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S2E7 - The Warcry She Told You Not to Worry About from 2018-04-18T21:53:20
Chris and Ally are joined by special guest Ashley Anderson, who knows more about Xena Warrior Princess than any of you. Xena and Callisto have sw...
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S2E6 - Xena with a Z from 2018-04-03T17:22:18
This episode features not one, not two, but THREE Lucys Lawless. Special guest Susana Polo (@NerdGerhl) helps Chris and Ally identify who is the poli...
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GABBYSODE #4 - Chris Explains It All! from 2018-03-30T01:49:12
Just what the internet needs - a man explaining some nerdy thing to a woman. Ally hasn't been too keen on comics lately. Fortunately, Chris knows a lot about comics! In this patreon-funded bonus...
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S2E5 - BLONDZ R GEWD from 2018-03-21T17:54:44
Hudson Leick and her outie are back for this iconic episode: The Return of Callisto! But have you heardicus? Guess who’s ALSO back: It’s Perdicus! It’s reunions left and right here as...
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S2E4 - One Man’s Vampire is Another Man’s Evil Lesbian from 2018-03-07T03:44:44
There are no New Zealand actors on Black Sails (that we know of), but that doesn’t stop us from having Daphne Olive (@daphneolive) as our...
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S2E3 - Six Cubits and a Greg from 2018-02-21T03:29:11
Psst. We heard that Jonathan had an 8 pack... that Jonathan was shredded. Oh, don't you remember Jonathan, the biblical hero of the, um, uh... children of Abraham? No? Well, you probably think g...
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S2E2 - Don't Be Such A Saddle Pommel from 2018-02-06T14:50:39
Join us, folks, as Xena Warrior Business crosses over the line into the dark web! From Capoeira ruffians to Ally schooling two grown men on Renaissance Faire style clothing, if you love women ch...
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S2E1: The Gap Betwixt Horse&Man from 2018-01-16T20:13:07
Vacation's over, pals, and we're back with everything you've been waiting for: MORE CENTAURS!! And yet another barely-adequate child actor who's appeared on The Tribe. Stephen Gaulin (Listen
GABBYSODE #3 - A Most Tedious Herxmas from 2017-12-27T16:28:05
Episode 26 - Triage Warrior Princess!!! from 2017-12-06T00:06:35
Well, we finally made it. It's the end of season 1, where Chris and Ally learn that you're never REALLY friends until you've both died in each other's arms. This episode has some wonderful highs...
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Episode 25 - He Likes Drumsticks from 2017-11-14T08:00
This episode swaps Xena's dark past with a merely plaintive one as we get a fairly underwhelming origin story and a fairly underwhelming SECOND brother for Xena to play off of for a single episo...
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Episode 24 - Callisto's Discount Ladder Emporium from 2017-11-01T05:30:03
WELP. It's official. This show is officially good. Three killer episodes IN! A! ROW! Finally, we get a watershed moment for Xena coming to terms with her guilt over her [kiwi accent] dark past [...
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Episode 23 - The Great Carbonated Xena Round Table! Xena Warrior Podcast Business! from 2017-10-17T07:00
So I heard you liked Xena podcasts, so we took your Xena podcast and we put a Xena podcast on your Xena podcast. That's right, Allison is joined by Katie, Livy and Vera from Listen
Episode 22 - She's Got Those Leadership Eyes from 2017-09-27T02:14:40
In a special Marvel edition of the podcast, Ally is joined by Laura Kammerman (laurizzlek) and Andrea Towers (_...
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Episode 21 - A Very Kidnappable Young Boy from 2017-09-13T03:11:01
This is an episode of firsts for Xena. It is the first interpretation of a bible story (oh boy). It is the first time Xena and Gabrielle bathe together. It is the first (and last) time we hear a...
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Gabbysode #2 - UBERFIC! from 2017-09-04T21:12:34
Episode 20 - Land Pirates and the Townsdad from 2017-08-29T07:30
It's Home Alone IV: Lost in New Greeceland! Vegetarians beware, because Ally has some beef on this Gabrielle-centric episode of Xena. We learn what "Gabby Style!" entails, and, spoiler alert, it...
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Episode 19 - Telling the Rocks her Secret Ways from 2017-08-15T04:00
He wears green, he steals things, he's Robin Hood with a Greek name: AUTOLYCUS IS HERE! Lovingly portrayed by Bruce Campbell, the King of thieves breathes life into this wonderful episode with h...
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Episode 18 - Mopey Sadsack Lost His Magic Hat from 2017-08-01T03:59
Of all the episodes to turn upsettingly horny, Chris didn’t think this was going to be the one. Oh, well. This episode marks a return of Marcus, Xena's road not taken. Xena sees first...
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Episode 17 - Greg Coming Out of his Well to Shame Gabrielle from 2017-07-19T03:05:45
Xena has many skills. Xena also has many twins. This episode introduces the first of many dopplegangers to come, with the unexpected added bonus of a side-Greg to Greg things up. Chris and Allis...
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Episode 16 - Chekhov's Spring-Loaded Wrist Knife from 2017-07-05T02:41:06
If ever there was a time to google Ambrosia Salad, now, dear listeners, is that time. Here's a question: if New Zealand is an Island, and that Island has treature on it, and Thirst Trap, Log Lad...
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Gabbysode #1 - The Saddle from 2017-06-29T03:17:28
Episode 15 - Whiplash, but in Ancient Greece from 2017-06-21T03:40:42
Chrisicus Allisonyus, the expert critic, discusses the nature of television in those wild, syndicated, pre-streaming, pre-binging years. While network shows got regular runs and regular timeslot...
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Episode 14 - Many Wicker Lawnchairs Gave Their Lives from 2017-06-06T04:27:29
This week on Captive Princeness (that's Prince Business, not Princess), Chris Sims, the Prince of Podcasting, is stripped of his title, left for dead, and sent to cohost a Xena podcas...
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Episode 13 - #chrisandaidan from 2017-05-24T02:21:35
Hello, my friends! We've got a very special episode in store for you tonight! Join us as we discuss a rare, never-before seen episode of Xena, Warrior Princess, entitled Chris [Sims] Gets Marrie...
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Episode 12 - Oh, Crumb, Here We Go... from 2017-05-10T03:47:06
In their discussion of this very forgettable but actually pretty good episode, Chris mistakes Allison (a library of Alexandria truther) for a flat earther! Anyway... you've grown lege...
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Episode 11 - What Y'all Ladies Get Up To When There's No Guys Around from 2017-04-26T03:44:26
Hey Amazon, wanna go for a ride? We're finally in double digits all around, friends, so you know what that means. Time for Chris and Allison to behold a TRIUMPH of special effects artistry, a ho...
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Episode 10 - Another Greg Bites the Dust from 2017-04-11T03:59:36
If ever you needed a reminder that Chris and Ally are still slogging through season one, Gabrielle throws herself at yet another shitty Greg in the second episode in a row featuring a deity chai...
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Episode 09 - I'm Okay with the Diaper Stuff from 2017-03-29T03:19:21
It's the crossover you demanded--or at least, somebody demanded it and we know it wasn't us--as Hercules and Iolaus join up with Xena and Gabrielle for an adventure of... TITAN...
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Episode 08 - Don't be Sorry, Just be BETTER from 2017-03-15T04:15:14
Good Morning! Good Night! Athens! Make sure you're pronouncing that correctly so that you can wake up the newest episode of Xena Warrior Business! Christa Rodriguez (Listen
Episode 07 - Xena is TOO STRONG to use her Safeword from 2017-03-01T02:36:09
Get ready for a landmark episode, as we watch the first appearance of Ares! Well, not the FIRST first appearance, but... Listen, it's complicated, and not just because we're trying to figure out...
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Episode 06 - No Hot Springs Jokes, Please from 2017-02-14T09:00
We took the road less traveled by...but we just couldn't cut it!! This week, special guest Lucas Brown (@lokified) joins us to talk about The Path Not ...
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Episode 05 - Powder My Goatee! from 2017-02-01T03:14:18
This week, special guest Elisabeth Dubois (@elisedubois) joins us to talk about Cradle of Hope, an episode that is shockingly not about the baby Ga...
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Episode 04 - DangerousBreasts.wav from 2017-01-17T06:00
Were you ever confused about the definition of a breast dagger and/or the appropriate time to use one? Have you ever been wracked with guilt over the lasting damage caused by throwing a rock int...
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