Intimacy Is Not Only About Sex, It’s About Connection - a podcast by Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW and Tami VerHelst
from 2022-03-11T16:45:15
Dr. Rob and Tami talk in this week’s episode about dealing with your addiction first before being able to get into a successful relationship that you want and deserve. They also talk about how integrity from your partner is important and why you need to set up healthy boundaries for yourself as your partner goes through recovery.
TAKEAWAYS:
[0:25] Do you treat addiction to sexual fantasy like addiction to porn? What are the recommended next steps to achieving real-life romance and/or sex?
[1:10] Disappearing into fantasy is porn. Dr. Rob explains further.
[2:30] Dr. Rob also shares how you can get into a successful relationship.
[6:25] Therapy is helpful over time but having a group helps further to really recover from addiction.
[7:35] Would erectile function return for a 70-year-old man? How long would it take to return?
[8:35] Sex for older people means men may not get an erection. Dr. Rob shares his advice.
[10:00] Tami shares her insights about how to not make sex the focus.
[11:35] Can you help us structure our weekly progress meeting to work well?
[12:25] Dr. Rob talks about empathic listening and how it is essential to improve relationships.
[14:45] Tami also talks about how communication should be a give and take.
[17:10] Dr. Rob shares two ways on how not to get into conflict with each other during these meetings.
[18:20] My husband says he is not homosexual. Is he acting out with same-sex relationships due to childhood trauma?
[20:44] If you have been abused, you might reenact it, but Dr. Rob explains further how it’s different when dealing with homosexuality.
[22:55] Tami adds that your husband is still cheating on you and explains why.
[24:40] My boyfriend is a professional musician who cheated on me. How do I stop being triggered by women who still attend his concerts? How do I start to be able to focus on my own life again?
[25:25] The women did not do this to you, it was your boyfriend’s choice to cheat on you.
[28:05] Dr. Rob talks about two situations where sex addicts are most likely to act out: unstructured time and travel.
RESOURCES:
Email Tami: Tami@Seekingintegrity.com
Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency Book by Robert Weiss
Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction by Robert Weiss
Cruise Control Book by Robert Weiss
Further episodes of Overcoming Betrayal
Further podcasts by Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW and Tami VerHelst
Website of Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW and Tami VerHelst