The Most Destructive Thing in the Relationship is Lack of Honesty - a podcast by Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW and Tami VerHelst

from 2022-08-26T17:02:32

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Dr. Rob and Tami answer your questions on betrayal and sex addiction. So many addicts feel that if they tell the truth, then their spouse or partner will leave them. They’re afraid that if they truly get to see the real you, they won’t accept you, but Dr. Rob has seen the other side of the coin. He has seen betrayed spouses so hurt and not understand why their addict wasn’t honest with them. They’ve often said that if they had known this was an issue, they’d have stuck by them to work it out with them and help them. Honesty is what keeps relationships intact.

TAKEAWAYS:

[:30] My husband is six months sober but not in recovery. I’m ready to hold hands, but not ready for sex. He says to stop teasing him with physical touch because it triggers his rejection wound. What should I do?

[3:10] What your husband is saying is ridiculous!

[6:15] Dr. Rob recommends that he goes to therapy.

[6:45] I’m a sex addict and have been separated from my wife for the last month. She doesn’t want to work things out. Is there any way I can help her understand?

[10:25] When you’re acting out, you ignore what your spouse is truly saying.

[12:45] So many spouses would have helped work through this with you if you were just honest. Instead, you’re acting out has left ripples of hurt.

[13:45] Does she really want honesty?

[17:00] I want to get help, but I don’t want to tell my wife about it. What should I do?

[20:05] Tell the truth and tell it faster.

[22:25] I am a female sex addict and I’m struggling. How do I keep through?

[25:00] Slow down and focus on your sobriety.

[27:15] Working on trauma doesn’t mean your desire will go away.

RESOURCES:

Seekingintegrity.com

Email Tami: Tami@Seekingintegrity.com

Sexandrelationshiphealing.com