When Do I Know It’s Time to Completely Separate from My Addict? - a podcast by Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW and Tami VerHelst
from 2023-05-19T16:36:39
Dr. Rob and Tami walk through someone who is struggling to figure out whether they should pour more energy into their loved one or if they should finally make the tough decision to separate. Dr. Rob understands that the listener wants to make sure they’ve exhausted all their options so that they can leave the relationship ‘with no regret’, but he explains why that’s not always the best approach.
TAKEAWAYS:
[:30] Should I stay or should I go?
[2:45] I want to make sure I’ve exhausted all possible options before I leave my addict. Is there a strategic plan for this?
[7:10] Wanting things to work out is a feeling, but they’re not facts. What are the facts when it comes to your addict’s actions?
[10:25] Should I do a formal disclosure even though we are no longer living together?
[13:15] When I first found out, I was SO MAD. Despite it being four years ago, I still feel the need to rage every few months. How can I better control this?
[19:35] Anger is a healthy emotion, but uncontrollable rage isn’t.
[20:25] My addict is resistant and I just want to leave. I need some confirmation.
[27:50] Don’t do the disclosure UNLESS you plan to be 100% truthful. Because the ‘white lies’ will come out later on.
RESOURCES:
Email Tami: Tami@Seekingintegrity.com
Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, by Robert Weiss
Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction, by Robert Weiss
Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, by Robert Weiss
Further episodes of Overcoming Betrayal
Further podcasts by Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW and Tami VerHelst
Website of Robert Weiss, PhD, MSW and Tami VerHelst