12 Damaging Ways Your Narcissistic Mother Lied to You About Who You Are - a podcast by Rhoberta Shaler, PhD

from 2018-07-29T17:17:52

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SAVE YOUR SANITY: HELP FOR HANDLING HIJACKALS®

with Rhoberta Shaler, PhD, The Relationship Help Doctor


12 DAMAGING WAYS YOUR NARCISSISTIC MOTHER LIED TO YOU ABOUT WHO YOU ARE


You don't have to wonder where your self-doubts came from if you were raised by a mother who had narcissistic, borderline, histrionic, or antisocial--Hijackal®--tendencies. She made sure you learned to walk on eggshells, second-guess yourself, and question your sanity! She would never let you feel good enough. Right?


In fact, she competed with you every second, on some level. And, she always HAD to win!


A narcissistic mother has to be at the top of the pile. She'll make sure she stays there, too. So, where does that leave you? At the bottom somewhere. Now, yes, you may be what is called her "Golden Child," the child who can do no wrong. She may haven one of those, especially if you have siblings. She may also choose on "Scapegoat Child," the one who can NEVER do anything right. And, the other siblings will be lost in the mix.


If your mom was like mine--and I was an only child--she just simple competed with me on every level all the time. So, how did she do that? By withholding approval, withholding acceptance, withholding affection, and withholding attention. It wasn't that she could play the piano or do other things I did. She didn't--and couldn't compete there--but, she simply ran hot and cold about my abilities. Such a Hijackal! One minute, she's telling the world about competitions I won and getting the credit for paying for all those music lessons, and the next, she's telling me that it's so annoying that I make so much noise practicing all the time. No-win situation!


Today, I'm talking about twelve ways your narcissistic mother, your borderline mother, your histrionic mother, or your antisocial mother will have lied to you about who you are. They cannot help it. They just have to do it. And, at deep levels, you had no choice but to take it in and believe it. It was, and is, emotional abuse!


Hijackals ® behave badly. They have an absolute need to have power and control over others. They are invested in keeping you down, controlled, and as powerless as possible. They feel they have done that when you are second-guessing yourself, and questioning your sanity.


When you've had a Hijackal mother, you have a lot of unpacking to do, to unearth and replace all the lies she told you about not being good enough, competent, capable, and more. Please take the time to do this. You matter, and your life can be so much more free, rewarding, and fulfilling when you don't believe the lies your mother told you. You can have healthy relationships that are emotionally intimate, once you stop believing her. She was wrong!


If you need help with this, I'm here for you. Subscribe to my newsletter, Tips for Relationships, HERE.


Let's talk soon. I can help. Schedule an initial hour consultation HERE for only $97.


I hope this empowers you to make positive changes NOW.


Talk soon.

Rhoberta


Rhoberta Shaler, PhD,

The Relationship Help Doctor

ForRelationshipHelp.com


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You can also listen to the last 32 episodes of Save Your Sanity on Mental Health News Radio Network. That's a great place to get in-depth insights for shoring up mental and emotional health of all kinds.


#Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople 

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